I Had to Tinkle, and Got A Medal

During March of 1979, while in West Germany, I participated in the Return of Forces to Germany (REFORGER) operation. This is where troops from different United States military bases came to Germany temporarily to play war games. This isn’t intended to offend anyone, but that is what the Army calls it, war games. However, even during war games military personnel can be killed accidentally. And we did have a few personnel killed. There were accidents.

There were soldiers and sailors from all different North Atlantic Treaty Organization (NATO) countries participating. German, French, Norwegian, U.S. Army, U.S. Marines etc. The war games were split into two armies. The Red army, and the blue army. It was decided by higher ranking military personnel, that the blue army would be the good guys, and red army would be the bad guys. The blue army was the NATO forces.

The war games were conducted in the Black Forest in Southern West Germany. All the soldiers wore electronic vests, and whenever they were shot, an alarm would sound, and you were eliminated from the battle. The weapons all had flash suppressors on the end of the barrels and fired blanks. There were also small blue hand grenades that made a loud noise when thrown, and if you were in a certain distance of the hand grenade, then you were a casualty.

There were personnel that were grading the war games as they progressed, to decide who became a casualty on both sides. This was a way to learn from the training and see what could be done better in a real-life scenario.

There was infantry, tanks, artillery, medical units, helicopters, etc., that participated. The weather was lousy. It was snowing, and raining constantly, and it was muddy too. This added some realism to the situation. A soldier must be able to fight in all weather conditions.

My unit was at the edge of the Black Forest, and we had set up large tents for our battalion. When an army unit sets up, there is always a perimeter set up as well. Out in front of the perimeter on all sides is a machine gun post. That post watches for the enemy and alerts the unit in case of an attack.

I was put on the Northern perimeter on an M-60 machine gun post. My job was to fire the machine gun and throw hand grenades. I had an assistant that would help feed the ammunition into the machine gun.

At night in the Black Forest, the wind would blow hard, and the snow would pile up fast. The trees were all very tall, and about one foot in circumference. When the wind whipped through the forest it sounded ghostly, almost like someone whining or crying.

 One night, I was standing watch at my post with an African American man from Alabama. I can’t remember his first name, but his last name was Branford. He was a character. He had me laughing constantly with the things he would say and do. We had to be quiet because there were troops that would be aggressing other troops at night.

However, I had to tinkle, and I told Branford I was going over among the trees, and do my business, and he should be watching the tree line for any aggressing troops. While I was in the forest, the wind whipped so hard around the trees, and it was freaky sounding, and I was freezing.

Suddenly, there was something in the trees moving slowly. I could make out a helmet with leaves on it. Then a rifle, and I could see it was the red army moving toward our position. I didn’t have time to run because they were too close to me, so I threw two hand grenades in that direction, and alarms started ringing out. I ran back to my post and yelled at Branford to fire the machine gun. Then there were more alarms ringing.

He fired in the direction of the troops in the forest, and I kept throwing hand grenades. Then the other soldiers in our unit came and started firing their weapons as well. We could see the troops in the forest were turning back. The battle only lasted a few minutes. Our captain asked us what happened, and I had to explain my situation to him. I told him I went to tinkle, and saw troops in the forest, and threw hand grenades, and told Branford to fire the machine gun. He started laughing and told us we did a good job and saved our unit from being captured.

About a month later while we were still in the field, the captain called us to assemble in formation. The platoon formed up in lines of four. We had four squads, and I was the third squad leader. To my surprise, the captain called my name to come forward in front of the platoon. I stood at attention, and the captain started reading off an award letter. I had been awarded the Army Commendation Medal. 

The Army Commendation Medal is awarded to any member of the U.S. Armed Forces, other than General Officers, who, while serving in any capacity with the U.S. Army after December 6, 1941, distinguishes themselves by heroism, meritorious achievement, or meritorious service. 

I was awarded this medal for my actions during the war games in West Germany. The war games continued for another two months, and it was decided that the blue army won. So, it’s kind of funny when I think about it today. I had to go tinkle, and I got a medal.