Reviews from

Looking for Orion - 2

Viewing comments for Chapter 20 "Investigation"
Brothers fight for faith ... and for their lives.

9 total reviews 
Comment from Ulla
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Hi Debora, II think you strike just the right tone in this chapter. Mum is striking the right tone and I like the jokes and banter between the two brothers. I'm looking forward to what's next. All best. Ulla:)))

 Comment Written 02-Jul-2020

reply by the author on 03-Jul-2020
    Thank you, Ulla! I always appreciate your encouraging words.
    Be blessed,
    Deb
Comment from Pearl Edwards
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I think you've got the banter between the two brothers spot on with this one Deb. You can feel the emotion behind their words, but no they'd not dare to show them. Great chapter,
cheers
valda

 Comment Written 02-Jul-2020

reply by the author on 02-Jul-2020
    Thank you for the encouragement! Appreciate you, as always.
    Blessings,
    Deb
Comment from Precious Owuamalam
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This is just beautiful. Mum's are always priceless. Their love knows no bounds. I enjoyed reading this. Beautiful tale!

Over to the next chapter.

You've written very well.

My best wishes, now and always!

 Comment Written 01-Jul-2020

reply by the author on 01-Jul-2020
    I like Rachel a lot. She's a combination ofmy mom and all the great moms I've known. Makes her super mom!
    Be blessed,
    Deb
Comment from Sandra Stoner-Mitchell
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That was so nice. The two brothers are teasing each other again, and that's good. My sons are 46 and 49, and they are still like that! lol. Love them both. Now to get those men that did this. I wonder if the police have found them. Excellent writing, my friend. Don't let me miss a chapter again!! :)) Sandra xx

 Comment Written 01-Jul-2020

reply by the author on 01-Jul-2020
    Yeah, I felt like we needed a bit of a breather before the action starts again. (Oh, was that a spoiler/ Oh, no! lol)
    My boys are 27 and 31. Sometimes they get a long great. But the older one is willing to eat peanut butter sandwiches or live in his truck when needed to fund his business. The younger is pretty self-indulgent. Go figure -- sometimes they clash BIG TIME.
    I'm glad you're enjoying the LOOONNNGGG read!
    Be blessed,
    Debby
Comment from thaities, Rebecca V.
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This is a perfectly great story to follow with all its twists and turns. So happy Cody is alive and their mother has her two sons. You have a great storytelling ability!

 Comment Written 29-Jun-2020

reply by the author on 29-Jun-2020
    Thank you, Rebecca! I only hope you odn't hate me after the next chapter goes up ? Yep, that was meant to be a 'reply cliff-hanger'. lol
    Blessings,
    Deb
reply by thaities, Rebecca V. on 29-Jun-2020
    I'll just keep in mind this is fiction! ha ha
Comment from royowen
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This is a fantastic episode, and I applaud you in it, the emotion and the descriptions of the emotions and the great imagery, and the spag free work was always outstanding, well done Debora, blessings Roy

 Comment Written 29-Jun-2020

reply by the author on 29-Jun-2020
    Thank you, Roy. I appreciate your encouragement!
    Blessings for the week,
    Deb
reply by royowen on 29-Jun-2020
    Most welcome
Comment from Margaret Bednar
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You do family SO well. The tender things, swiping the hair from his forehead, the brotherly banter, the not being able to fool his mother about wanting the shake... it is all so well done!

 Comment Written 29-Jun-2020

reply by the author on 29-Jun-2020
    Thank you, Margaret. I just wanted an emotional breather before the next bit. But I do love Rachel. She's my mom, had my mom lived to see us grown. She'd have been that tender, get-your-head-out-of-your-butt kind of woman that Rachel is. :) (Or at least, that's how I imagine how she'd be.) So I wrote her. lol. Ah, the freedom of writing.
    Blessings,
    DebBlessings,
    Deb
Comment from Iza Deleanu
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Finally Cody is out of the woods, he made it and now you let some tension out and crack some jokes like this one :"if it happens again, though, I'll double my overnight babysitting rates and bankrupt you." Thank you for sharing and good luck with the next chapter.

 Comment Written 29-Jun-2020

reply by the author on 29-Jun-2020
    Thank you, Iza. But the action isn't over, so take a deep breath ? :)
    Blessings,
    Deb
Comment from lyenochka
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You seem to know hospital scenes well - you made it seem very realistic right down to the ice chips and thin gowns. Touching scene between mother and sons! (I think you'd get more reviews if you promoted these.)

"He swisheded the ice " (swished)
"Jack looked chagrinned" (chagrined)

 Comment Written 29-Jun-2020

reply by the author on 29-Jun-2020
    I didn't promote it!? Oi! Let me go do that ? duh.
    Thank you for the catches. :)
    Blessings and a good week to you!
    Deb