One Leaf-(Cinquain)
leaf falling on a windy day4 total reviews
Comment from mickbey
Nice job of capturing the moment, the illustration is a crisp image and lets us visualize everything described in the poem, it lets the mind 'wander' right into the sight that we have all seen, nice work, good luck.
reply by the author on 20-Oct-2013
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Nice job of capturing the moment, the illustration is a crisp image and lets us visualize everything described in the poem, it lets the mind 'wander' right into the sight that we have all seen, nice work, good luck.
Comment Written 20-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 20-Oct-2013
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Thank you
Comment from Sueellen11
Perfect description of a cold wind stripping leaves from trees,,, its imagery is so perfect,,, I felt as I was the leaf,,, great entry,,, good luck,,blessings,,,sueellen
reply by the author on 19-Oct-2013
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Perfect description of a cold wind stripping leaves from trees,,, its imagery is so perfect,,, I felt as I was the leaf,,, great entry,,, good luck,,blessings,,,sueellen
Comment Written 19-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 19-Oct-2013
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Thank you
Comment from mmayen
Gust of
wind blows (place another word)
single leaf snaps off tree
drifting slowly down, floating through
cold air
you don't need the capital letters expect for the first line.
reply by the author on 18-Oct-2013
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Gust of
wind blows (place another word)
single leaf snaps off tree
drifting slowly down, floating through
cold air
you don't need the capital letters expect for the first line.
Comment Written 18-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 18-Oct-2013
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Thank you-I will read again and adjust if I can
Comment from kiwisteveh
Your cinquain poem follows the syllable count correctly, but is very plain in its description. I would hope to see more vivid word choices to illustrate colour or movement. 'drifts' is good.
Also your phrases seem disjointed because of the need to have a precise syllable count. The worst affected line is 'wind blows - single' where 'single' really belongs with the next line.
Steve
reply by the author on 18-Oct-2013
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Your cinquain poem follows the syllable count correctly, but is very plain in its description. I would hope to see more vivid word choices to illustrate colour or movement. 'drifts' is good.
Also your phrases seem disjointed because of the need to have a precise syllable count. The worst affected line is 'wind blows - single' where 'single' really belongs with the next line.
Steve
Comment Written 18-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 18-Oct-2013
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Thanks