To Love a Loser
about loving an abuser33 total reviews
Comment from Simple Reflection
This is good! You've shown how a woman sits and waits, longing for her abuser to come home when she knows that in reality she is fearful of him. Your words have good expression. The last line is very poignant!
reply by the author on 16-Nov-2013
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This is good! You've shown how a woman sits and waits, longing for her abuser to come home when she knows that in reality she is fearful of him. Your words have good expression. The last line is very poignant!
Comment Written 16-Nov-2013
reply by the author on 16-Nov-2013
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Thanks for the great review. It's sad to think this happens all the time.
Comment from ann marie mazz
hello
you have written with dignity and grace
the words are vivid and clear
the presentation and illustration are marvelous
never did you stray and you have met the challenge
I know of your words only second hand as I have worked in shelters for women and children so I know many stories
thank you for sharing
good luck with the contest
ann marie
reply by the author on 10-Oct-2013
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hello
you have written with dignity and grace
the words are vivid and clear
the presentation and illustration are marvelous
never did you stray and you have met the challenge
I know of your words only second hand as I have worked in shelters for women and children so I know many stories
thank you for sharing
good luck with the contest
ann marie
Comment Written 10-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 10-Oct-2013
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Thanks for the wonderful review. We see this sort of thing all too often. Glad you only know of it second hand. My loser was never violent, so in a way I was lucky.
Comment from Majormajormajormajor
what was the love that started the relationship? What is the magnetic draw back to the abuser: a childhood premonition that she was to be abused? Or a bourgeoisie routine that became comfortable? Or was it a "drawn to the flame" excitement of violence? All of the above sound horrendously callous, but on the underside of that callousness is where I think the true interest of the story lies. Nobody starts a relationship with a jab and two body shots, even in prison. We all get abused and taken advantage of every day - having been through a horrific experience, try to tell us why we let ourselves into these vulnerable situations, and having been there, how you, and thereby we, might have a guide out.
reply by the author on 02-Oct-2013
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what was the love that started the relationship? What is the magnetic draw back to the abuser: a childhood premonition that she was to be abused? Or a bourgeoisie routine that became comfortable? Or was it a "drawn to the flame" excitement of violence? All of the above sound horrendously callous, but on the underside of that callousness is where I think the true interest of the story lies. Nobody starts a relationship with a jab and two body shots, even in prison. We all get abused and taken advantage of every day - having been through a horrific experience, try to tell us why we let ourselves into these vulnerable situations, and having been there, how you, and thereby we, might have a guide out.
Comment Written 02-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 02-Oct-2013
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A few of the guys didn't like this one much. I don't know how these relationships get started. I don't know why some women tolerate them. We all face jerks in everyday life, but I can't imagine allowing one in my home. I just know it happens far too much, and the woman usually gets the worst of it.
Comment from 9999pool
This write is very beautifully written, the sad story aside. The words and the lines are weaved intricately and the rhyming is so perfect that the flow of the story was not hindered but come to the forefront about a desperate woman who cling on to her husband although he was no good in every way.
Why she stayed, many will question but then again this is what we are willing to sacrifice for the sake of love.
Such love-hate relationship is hard to define and we can never judge to say she should have left him. If that was what she wanted she would have been gone by now.
A truly remarkable story about love and sacrifice and of how much pain and suffering we are wiling to endear to stick to the marriage/union.
Excellent piece of work and has a very good chance of winning this contest, smiles.
Cheerio, hugs, Ritchie. :))
reply by the author on 24-Sep-2013
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This write is very beautifully written, the sad story aside. The words and the lines are weaved intricately and the rhyming is so perfect that the flow of the story was not hindered but come to the forefront about a desperate woman who cling on to her husband although he was no good in every way.
Why she stayed, many will question but then again this is what we are willing to sacrifice for the sake of love.
Such love-hate relationship is hard to define and we can never judge to say she should have left him. If that was what she wanted she would have been gone by now.
A truly remarkable story about love and sacrifice and of how much pain and suffering we are wiling to endear to stick to the marriage/union.
Excellent piece of work and has a very good chance of winning this contest, smiles.
Cheerio, hugs, Ritchie. :))
Comment Written 24-Sep-2013
reply by the author on 24-Sep-2013
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Thanks for the six! I have no idea why women stay with men like that, but they do. I could never put up with it. Thanks again for the kind words and the six stars.
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Thanks for the reply and have a wonderful day ahead.
Cheerio, hugs, Ritchie. :))
Comment from Spitfire
What a sad poem, moreso because women can't let go! They think it will get better. I suspect the answer is in these lines:Her happiness depends on the love of him
And her future prospects grow so dim.
reply by the author on 16-Sep-2013
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What a sad poem, moreso because women can't let go! They think it will get better. I suspect the answer is in these lines:Her happiness depends on the love of him
And her future prospects grow so dim.
Comment Written 15-Sep-2013
reply by the author on 16-Sep-2013
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It's so sad that this happens so often. Thanks for the great review.
Comment from lakeport
To love a loser,indeed that's a very heartfelt expressed poem, nice rhyming, thanks for sharing it, God bless you. Hugs!Lakeport.
reply by the author on 12-Sep-2013
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To love a loser,indeed that's a very heartfelt expressed poem, nice rhyming, thanks for sharing it, God bless you. Hugs!Lakeport.
Comment Written 12-Sep-2013
reply by the author on 12-Sep-2013
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I'm glad you liked it. Thanks for the great reviw.
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your welcome.Hugs!Lakeport,
Comment from Sally Carter
I would absolutely give this a 5 on content, Cindy. In a previous life I used to have to take interviews from people in this situation (usually women, but the occasional man), and everything you have said rings totally true.
I used to wonder why they took it, but the more I listened, and sometimes to tape recorded conversations, the more I began to understand. It's very difficult for someone to explain the mental undermining that accompanies physical violence, until the abused is no longer sure what is true and what is her fault.
All this you have captured superbly.
The reason for the 4 is that the meter is somewhat clunky. I have not counted syllables, and it maybe that the syllable count is consistent, but the patterns of stresses and unstressed syllables is not there.
I don't know you, so I don't know how much detail you like to get in a review, so I will leave it there unless you ask me to elaborate. I have a very bad tendency to try and re-write lines, which is rude! I would simply recommend you decide what is the dominant meter and then see how the existing lines can be tweaked to fit. If you want to talk further, I love talking meter, lol.
With best wishes
Sally
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reply by the author on 07-Sep-2013
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I would absolutely give this a 5 on content, Cindy. In a previous life I used to have to take interviews from people in this situation (usually women, but the occasional man), and everything you have said rings totally true.
I used to wonder why they took it, but the more I listened, and sometimes to tape recorded conversations, the more I began to understand. It's very difficult for someone to explain the mental undermining that accompanies physical violence, until the abused is no longer sure what is true and what is her fault.
All this you have captured superbly.
The reason for the 4 is that the meter is somewhat clunky. I have not counted syllables, and it maybe that the syllable count is consistent, but the patterns of stresses and unstressed syllables is not there.
I don't know you, so I don't know how much detail you like to get in a review, so I will leave it there unless you ask me to elaborate. I have a very bad tendency to try and re-write lines, which is rude! I would simply recommend you decide what is the dominant meter and then see how the existing lines can be tweaked to fit. If you want to talk further, I love talking meter, lol.
With best wishes
Sally
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 06-Sep-2013
reply by the author on 07-Sep-2013
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Thanks for an honest review.
Comment from mfowler
I have rated this five because of the themes you've explored and the emotional impact of your words. I found the structure a bit awkward. It might pay to simply separate each rhyming paired lines. That would give each idea a bite sized emotional impact, something these difficult topics need if a reader is given visual time to absorb the details.
reply by the author on 03-Sep-2013
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I have rated this five because of the themes you've explored and the emotional impact of your words. I found the structure a bit awkward. It might pay to simply separate each rhyming paired lines. That would give each idea a bite sized emotional impact, something these difficult topics need if a reader is given visual time to absorb the details.
Comment Written 03-Sep-2013
reply by the author on 03-Sep-2013
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Thanks for your input and for reviewing. I'll have to take another look at it. I thought it was too short to break it up. Could be I was wrong.
Comment from Dawn Munro
Oh my, this is such a touching poem, and the imagery is quite vivid in my mind - I see her pouring that wine.
I am pleased to see your notes because it gives me the opportunity to say that's the very thing I try to tell people when they think something I write is about me/my life - it's about my experiences/observations in life most often - fiction, but for immediacy, I often make it first person. :)
Wonderful job!!! I was very moved, and your rhyme is excellent too. I also want to compliment you on your choice of artwork - it's stunning!
reply by the author on 03-Sep-2013
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Oh my, this is such a touching poem, and the imagery is quite vivid in my mind - I see her pouring that wine.
I am pleased to see your notes because it gives me the opportunity to say that's the very thing I try to tell people when they think something I write is about me/my life - it's about my experiences/observations in life most often - fiction, but for immediacy, I often make it first person. :)
Wonderful job!!! I was very moved, and your rhyme is excellent too. I also want to compliment you on your choice of artwork - it's stunning!
Comment Written 03-Sep-2013
reply by the author on 03-Sep-2013
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No, it isn't about me. I'd have the creep arrested. I saw this and I was trying to understand why she didn't. The guy was on the show and I wanted to reach thru the TV and choke him. I'm glad my work touched you. Many thanks for the review.
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You are very welcome.
Comment from Titanx9
There are women out there like the one you described here. I used to be judgmental, but not anymore. I realize some folks are just weaker than others and don't have the fortitude to fight back. I pity them, because they literally are trapped as surely as though they're in a cage. I don't understand it, because I'd either be dead or serving time before I allowed someone to abuse me in that fashion. Good luck in the contest!
reply by the author on 03-Sep-2013
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There are women out there like the one you described here. I used to be judgmental, but not anymore. I realize some folks are just weaker than others and don't have the fortitude to fight back. I pity them, because they literally are trapped as surely as though they're in a cage. I don't understand it, because I'd either be dead or serving time before I allowed someone to abuse me in that fashion. Good luck in the contest!
Comment Written 02-Sep-2013
reply by the author on 03-Sep-2013
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I can't imagine putting up with that. I know that millions of women do. Like you, I used to judge. I'd have him arrested and put in a cage. Many thanks for the review and good wishes in the contest.