Along the Jericho Road
Viewing comments for Chapter 22 "Poha Moon, Pt. 2"Murder Mystery
41 total reviews
Comment from Tina55
Nice, smooth writing, Bev. I find it a little odd that the priest doesn't ask his housekeeper 'who' tossed her into the closet when she mentions that 'he threw me to the floor and made the lights explode.' Have I missed something? I guess I'm just not giving enough leeway for him to help her to her senses.
Interesting, twisting dialogue between the priest and his housekeeper. I like how you use the dog to kind of give the scene a little breather.
Great tension!
Nicely done, Bev. Sorry it's taken me so long to catch up...
Tina
:)
reply by the author on 07-Nov-2012
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Nice, smooth writing, Bev. I find it a little odd that the priest doesn't ask his housekeeper 'who' tossed her into the closet when she mentions that 'he threw me to the floor and made the lights explode.' Have I missed something? I guess I'm just not giving enough leeway for him to help her to her senses.
Interesting, twisting dialogue between the priest and his housekeeper. I like how you use the dog to kind of give the scene a little breather.
Great tension!
Nicely done, Bev. Sorry it's taken me so long to catch up...
Tina
:)
Comment Written 07-Nov-2012
reply by the author on 07-Nov-2012
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Thanks so much, Tina. I can appreciate the lack of time issue! And I appreciate your comments and generous review of the chapter.
Father Brian did have an encounter with the energy in a previous chapter and felt it was demonic. He is convinced that he will have to face this demon personally.
Always good to get your keen insights on my writing, Tina. You don't miss much LOL.
Hugs, Bev
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Yes, I remember that Father Brian had that encounter...I guess I just couldn't remember if his housekeeper knew about it/HIM, or if the encounter had been kept secret. So, it wasn't clear to me that the Father would automatically know who she meant by 'HE'.
How's that for rambling? LOL
Have a great night!! :)
Comment from wordsfromsue
Do you know what? I read this last Saturday, and it was soooo good, but I wanted to give you a six, so I was waiting until I got my new allowance, so then I forgot, until the next chapter came out, and now I see I can't give you a six anyway, because you're too good and already have your limit of them from me!!!
This chapter WAS scary darey and I loved it!!! I love that the terrifying bits of information are starting to come to light little by little.... so, this thing's been around for awhile..... and she smelled that stinky stank when the Monsignor lived there. I'm almost surprised she's still alive to talk about it.
Keep the doggie active in the story, I love his appearances. :-)
reply by the author on 03-Nov-2012
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Do you know what? I read this last Saturday, and it was soooo good, but I wanted to give you a six, so I was waiting until I got my new allowance, so then I forgot, until the next chapter came out, and now I see I can't give you a six anyway, because you're too good and already have your limit of them from me!!!
This chapter WAS scary darey and I loved it!!! I love that the terrifying bits of information are starting to come to light little by little.... so, this thing's been around for awhile..... and she smelled that stinky stank when the Monsignor lived there. I'm almost surprised she's still alive to talk about it.
Keep the doggie active in the story, I love his appearances. :-)
Comment Written 03-Nov-2012
reply by the author on 03-Nov-2012
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Sue, you are such a sweetheart. How kind of you to want to give me a six. I'm just truly thrilled with your continued interest in my story and all the support you've given me! Yes, Alyx may end up being even more heroic as the story continues. So glad you enjoyed the read. The supernatural aspect will continue in further chapters, something I just can't seem to get away from LOL. Thanks so much! Hugs, Bev
Comment from GrayWitch
Look forward to reading more. Good, believable characters and I like the Irish nomenclature throughout the piece. The chapter leaves the reader wanting to know more and adds to the suspense...
reply by the author on 30-Oct-2012
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Look forward to reading more. Good, believable characters and I like the Irish nomenclature throughout the piece. The chapter leaves the reader wanting to know more and adds to the suspense...
Comment Written 30-Oct-2012
reply by the author on 30-Oct-2012
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Thanks for the great review, GrayWitch. I appreciate you taking time to read. Warm regards, Bev
Comment from Scribbler67
Another pacy and enthralling chapter. You have a clean, uncluttered style, with that added human touch which brings your well-realised characters into sharp relief.
I'm enjoying this very much. Very gripping.
reply by the author on 30-Oct-2012
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Another pacy and enthralling chapter. You have a clean, uncluttered style, with that added human touch which brings your well-realised characters into sharp relief.
I'm enjoying this very much. Very gripping.
Comment Written 30-Oct-2012
reply by the author on 30-Oct-2012
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Thanks for the really helpful review, Scribbler. I do appreciate you taking time to read my chapter and thank you for your generous support. Warmest regards, Bev
Comment from kleck140
Great writing again...I learn so much from your
writing. The descriptive writing that I wish I had.
You tell a great story and held my interest to the
end. I printed it, so I can read it again and learn.
Thanks for sharing.
reply by the author on 30-Oct-2012
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Great writing again...I learn so much from your
writing. The descriptive writing that I wish I had.
You tell a great story and held my interest to the
end. I printed it, so I can read it again and learn.
Thanks for sharing.
Comment Written 30-Oct-2012
reply by the author on 30-Oct-2012
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Ellie, thank you so much for this postive and encouraging review. I am honored that you found my chapter interesting and helpful. There's so much we can learn from each other, isn't there? The great thing about this site. I appreciate you! Hugs, Bev
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Thanks for your quick response. How do you find time to write? That is the problem I have.
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That's a very good point about time for writing. I am retired, which makes it easier. But the time I need to devote to improving my skills ends up taking up a lot of my day. I don't know how working folks do it and I admire their efforts even more.
Even with all the time I have, I still procrastinate. THAT's my biggest issue LOL.
Xxx Bev
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Thanks for your encouragement. I am trying to post Chapter One of my book this week.
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Good! I'm really looking forward to reading that. Xxx Bev
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Thanks for your quick response!
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You bet! :0)
Comment from Margaret Snowdon
a great chapter, Bev - rather
creepy. The conversation between the
Brian and Carolyn flowed perfectly.
It seems a while since I read your work
so it was great to find a chapter waiting.
I've not been on line much at all since
I've been caring for my older sister, have
had family staying to feed - just not enough
time... thus I'm late in reviewing.
Margaret
reply by the author on 30-Oct-2012
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a great chapter, Bev - rather
creepy. The conversation between the
Brian and Carolyn flowed perfectly.
It seems a while since I read your work
so it was great to find a chapter waiting.
I've not been on line much at all since
I've been caring for my older sister, have
had family staying to feed - just not enough
time... thus I'm late in reviewing.
Margaret
Comment Written 30-Oct-2012
reply by the author on 30-Oct-2012
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Thank you, Margaret. I definitely understand about the time constraints. I'm just glad you choose to read and follow. That's a blessing in itself. Hope your sister is better soon!
Hugs, Bev
Comment from fictionwriter
Another great addition to the story. I'm not sure I'd want to meet that thing in the dark. Thank goodness for the good ghosts. Well done.
reply by the author on 30-Oct-2012
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Another great addition to the story. I'm not sure I'd want to meet that thing in the dark. Thank goodness for the good ghosts. Well done.
Comment Written 29-Oct-2012
reply by the author on 30-Oct-2012
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Thank you, Tricia. I appreciate you staying faithful to my novel. Your support and generosity mean a lot. Warmest regards, Bev
Comment from mizzkris20
Along the Jericho Road
The name caught me and the picture dragged me
to read the chapter. I am sure glad that I did...
This is great! I like the way you write what previously
happened, thanks for sharing
reply by the author on 29-Oct-2012
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Along the Jericho Road
The name caught me and the picture dragged me
to read the chapter. I am sure glad that I did...
This is great! I like the way you write what previously
happened, thanks for sharing
Comment Written 29-Oct-2012
reply by the author on 29-Oct-2012
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Thank you! I really appreciate you choosing to read my chapter, mizzkris. Really nice to hear from you. Warm regards, Bev
Comment from Maureen's Pen
Sharp teeth in this one, had me holding my breath. :D
As always your writing has kept me glued to the screen and reading is smooth with great character emotion in this that grabs the reader too.
Well done my friend and thanks for sharing.
Maureen
reply by the author on 29-Oct-2012
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Sharp teeth in this one, had me holding my breath. :D
As always your writing has kept me glued to the screen and reading is smooth with great character emotion in this that grabs the reader too.
Well done my friend and thanks for sharing.
Maureen
Comment Written 29-Oct-2012
reply by the author on 29-Oct-2012
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Hello, my friend. Thank you so much for continuing to follow my story. I really do appreciate your generosity and support, given what's going on in your own life. You are such an inspiration! Love, Bev
Comment from RogerDodger
This is excellent work. It makes me want to read more. The work has been edited very well. I will review more of your work when time allows me to. Thank you for the great read.
Roger
reply by the author on 29-Oct-2012
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This is excellent work. It makes me want to read more. The work has been edited very well. I will review more of your work when time allows me to. Thank you for the great read.
Roger
Comment Written 29-Oct-2012
reply by the author on 29-Oct-2012
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Thank you so very much, Roger. I am thrilled with this awesome and generous review. I really appreciate it! Warmest regards, Bev
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Your welcome Bev.
I hope to see more of your work.
Roger
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Thank you, Roger!