The Day the Earth Died
For the Conundrum of Purple Roses competition.22 total reviews
Comment from MissCellanea
Slightly rushed? I was in awe during the entire reading! The use of imagery was breathtaking, pulling the reader through the story.
You captured the emotions of a soldier well. The use of the journal extracts was spot on.
Great read. I truly enjoyed reading this.
Sue
reply by the author on 03-Sep-2008
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Slightly rushed? I was in awe during the entire reading! The use of imagery was breathtaking, pulling the reader through the story.
You captured the emotions of a soldier well. The use of the journal extracts was spot on.
Great read. I truly enjoyed reading this.
Sue
Comment Written 02-Sep-2008
reply by the author on 03-Sep-2008
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Thankyou Sue :-). Historically, most of my best stuff has been written at breakneck speed with a deadline fast approaching; it seems to enhance my creativity somewhat! Of course, I usually have to do some editing afterwards, and I'd hate to be under that level of pressure all the time, but it's certainly exciting. I'm glad you enjoyed my story.
Comment from jojosug
Beautifully crafted, you summed up the emotions and feelings so well, yet kept the issue of war at the forefront. A good read.
reply by the author on 01-Sep-2008
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Beautifully crafted, you summed up the emotions and feelings so well, yet kept the issue of war at the forefront. A good read.
Comment Written 01-Sep-2008
reply by the author on 01-Sep-2008
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Thanks jojo; I was really pleased with this one, and it's generated a flattering (and highly encouraging!) response. Although it didn't quite win the contest, I'm extremely happy I wrote it :-)
Comment from storymama
You have an amazing imagination! This is very well written, especially for being rushed. I only have a couple of suggestions.
could have got there in time- 'got' should be 'gotten'
we wont need - won't
general Bethesda - General
years old(,) for heaven's
I'm going to give you five stars anyway, and trust you to handle the edits. God bless you.
reply by the author on 01-Sep-2008
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You have an amazing imagination! This is very well written, especially for being rushed. I only have a couple of suggestions.
could have got there in time- 'got' should be 'gotten'
we wont need - won't
general Bethesda - General
years old(,) for heaven's
I'm going to give you five stars anyway, and trust you to handle the edits. God bless you.
Comment Written 31-Aug-2008
reply by the author on 01-Sep-2008
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Edits duly applied; thanks for pointing them out Storymama. And congrats on winning the compo; yours was my favourite entry. Thankyou for taking the time to review my story :-)
Comment from c_lucas
A very well written, but unusual science fiction story. It has very good imagery and a very good descriptive scheme. Your story line is highly imagitive. Good luck in your contest.
reply by the author on 01-Sep-2008
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A very well written, but unusual science fiction story. It has very good imagery and a very good descriptive scheme. Your story line is highly imagitive. Good luck in your contest.
Comment Written 31-Aug-2008
reply by the author on 01-Sep-2008
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... A close second in the end, but that's fine as the compo gave me the story idea, and I loved writing it. Sci-Fi is something I keep meaning to write more of. Thanls for the review :-)
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You're welcome
Comment from DrCook
Very good and engaging story. I am not familiar with the term "potted history" and would, as a former history professor, appreciate a definition. Thanks for sharing your imagination!
reply by the author on 31-Aug-2008
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Very good and engaging story. I am not familiar with the term "potted history" and would, as a former history professor, appreciate a definition. Thanks for sharing your imagination!
Comment Written 31-Aug-2008
reply by the author on 31-Aug-2008
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I had a worrying half hour just now looking up a term that I thought was standard but turned out to be quite rare! Anyway, I can now say with reasonable confidence that a "potted history" is a brief/outline history of something, as taken from a little-known third meaning of the word potted, as per below (taken from www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary):
POTTED
adjective
Date: 1646
1: preserved in a pot, jar, or can
2: planted or grown in a pot
3: briefly and superficially summarized
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Great! Now I have a new word! Thanks!:-)
Comment from butterflykiss
This was very good, and I'll bet that the government would act just like you said if we were to be visited by aliens from outerspace. It was sad that something so beautiful would be the end of us.
Butterflykiss
reply by the author on 30-Aug-2008
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This was very good, and I'll bet that the government would act just like you said if we were to be visited by aliens from outerspace. It was sad that something so beautiful would be the end of us.
Butterflykiss
Comment Written 30-Aug-2008
reply by the author on 30-Aug-2008
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I think the arrogance of believing too much in ourselves and our reality is humanity's fatal flaw. In that sense, I suppose this story is a tragedy of sorts :-). Thankyou for reading my story.
Comment from lawriemac
I enjoyed reading this short story very much.
It kept me enthralled the moment I started reading right up to the ending.
Your science 'fiction' may well become 'fact', knowing how arrogant the human race can be.
A lovely story that had me engrossed.
Best wishes and good luck in the contest.
Lawrie
reply by the author on 30-Aug-2008
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I enjoyed reading this short story very much.
It kept me enthralled the moment I started reading right up to the ending.
Your science 'fiction' may well become 'fact', knowing how arrogant the human race can be.
A lovely story that had me engrossed.
Best wishes and good luck in the contest.
Lawrie
Comment Written 30-Aug-2008
reply by the author on 30-Aug-2008
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Thanks Lawrie; I enjoyed writing it too :-). Thankyou for the review.
Comment from amadan01
I enjoyed it, and "space stuff" is not usually my thing, but this was interesting to read. I really liked the use of the diary entries. The time passage was very well played. Just right, neither too big of leaps or too much of the same. Good job.
reply by the author on 29-Aug-2008
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I enjoyed it, and "space stuff" is not usually my thing, but this was interesting to read. I really liked the use of the diary entries. The time passage was very well played. Just right, neither too big of leaps or too much of the same. Good job.
Comment Written 29-Aug-2008
reply by the author on 29-Aug-2008
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Thanks Amadan; this was an experiment for me, and I enjoyed writing it immensely :-)
Comment from Aleksandramarie
hmmm, I'm not normally one for Sci-fi...but this was compelling and an unusual read for me.
We never really find out 'what' the roses are, I love the last two paragraphs and their descriptions... even the most innocuous things can be dangerous... or be careful what we wish for?
you did a fine job with this, and I think you got the nits. I read this in the morning, and now I don't see the offenders again, perhaps I am just sleepy,
Good luck in the contest, msp
reply by the author on 29-Aug-2008
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hmmm, I'm not normally one for Sci-fi...but this was compelling and an unusual read for me.
We never really find out 'what' the roses are, I love the last two paragraphs and their descriptions... even the most innocuous things can be dangerous... or be careful what we wish for?
you did a fine job with this, and I think you got the nits. I read this in the morning, and now I don't see the offenders again, perhaps I am just sleepy,
Good luck in the contest, msp
Comment Written 28-Aug-2008
reply by the author on 29-Aug-2008
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I suspect the nits are still in there, but thankfully most people don't seem to have noticed ;-). I'll have another read through...
Comment from jlsavell
Fleedleflump, I have totally enjoyed this pice of work. Well written in a short amount of time.The storyline kept me engaged, Stark mental picture of destruction and despair..even the haze of a beautiful but deadly purple.
wonderful and creative write..jlsavell
reply by the author on 29-Aug-2008
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Fleedleflump, I have totally enjoyed this pice of work. Well written in a short amount of time.The storyline kept me engaged, Stark mental picture of destruction and despair..even the haze of a beautiful but deadly purple.
wonderful and creative write..jlsavell
Comment Written 28-Aug-2008
reply by the author on 29-Aug-2008
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Thankyou jlsavell. Your words are encouragement :-)