Precious Gems: An Anthology
Viewing comments for Chapter 11 "Absolution"A Rhyming Collection of Treasured Works
26 total reviews
Comment from storymama
Your poem is completely heartbreaking. I knew I wouldn't want to read the entries for this contest. I'm running out of tissues. This is beautifully written. God bless you. Laura
reply by the author on 14-Aug-2008
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Your poem is completely heartbreaking. I knew I wouldn't want to read the entries for this contest. I'm running out of tissues. This is beautifully written. God bless you. Laura
Comment Written 14-Aug-2008
reply by the author on 14-Aug-2008
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Hi Laura. Yes, I've read a few of the entries, and there are some real heart clenchers in there. I'm glad you liked this one, although am a bit sorry it upset you so much! Thanks very much for your review and comments. God bless you right back! xoxoxoxxo
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Oh, don't be sorry. It is beautifully written. I made myself read all of them in one night. I knew I couldn't handle it two nights in a row. I'm sure I wouldn't have cried if I didn't need to. Have a great weekend. God bless you. Laura
Comment from fayesh
It was nicely done, and it captured the tragic relationships in families. Not only did you capture the trgic loss of a motehr, but also the loss of connection with family. Good job.
reply by the author on 13-Aug-2008
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It was nicely done, and it captured the tragic relationships in families. Not only did you capture the trgic loss of a motehr, but also the loss of connection with family. Good job.
Comment Written 13-Aug-2008
reply by the author on 13-Aug-2008
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Thanks so very much fayesh! I appreciate this review xoxoxoxoxo
Comment from Mischief's Momma
Great job on this poem alpacalady.
You have captured very well the essence of the spouse who is left alone when the other dies. Things are so often said that no-one means at times of tragedy.
Very well done, no spags, good luck in the contest!
MM
reply by the author on 12-Aug-2008
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Great job on this poem alpacalady.
You have captured very well the essence of the spouse who is left alone when the other dies. Things are so often said that no-one means at times of tragedy.
Very well done, no spags, good luck in the contest!
MM
Comment Written 12-Aug-2008
reply by the author on 12-Aug-2008
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Hi MM. Thanks so much for reading and reviewing this! It cheered me up a bit, as after looking at the votes, the old heart sank quite a bit! Still, that's the way the cookie crumbles...
I'm glad you enjoyed this. It is a sad scenario, and one that to a small degree, I personally know about. Family can be one's nemesis at times. xoxoxoxo
Comment from jshep
You have me in tears. I don't know how I missed this piece. It is heartrending, draws the reader in so tightly they want to sob. It made me think of my father (a reverse situation of this poem- my posted story Absolution) who died of cancer and had not spoken to me for the 8 years before he died. Broke my heart. A powerful piece. Top contender, you have my vote. Excellent job.
reply by the author on 11-Aug-2008
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You have me in tears. I don't know how I missed this piece. It is heartrending, draws the reader in so tightly they want to sob. It made me think of my father (a reverse situation of this poem- my posted story Absolution) who died of cancer and had not spoken to me for the 8 years before he died. Broke my heart. A powerful piece. Top contender, you have my vote. Excellent job.
Comment Written 11-Aug-2008
reply by the author on 11-Aug-2008
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Thanks so very much jshep. I am sorry to hear about what happened with your own father. Sometimes family can be our nemesis. This poem is, although a little speculative and partly fictional, quite relative to the situation between myself and my father. He insulted and criticised me for the last time two years ago, and I wonder sometimes who should make the first move now. I've tried in the past, to no avail. My mother, as always, stays out of things, saying she wants an end to it, but does nothing. So this poem is fictional with regards to the dying father and "son", yet it hurt to write it and to read it sometimes, unless I'm criticising it!
Thank God I'm not a comedian! I'd laugh at me own jokes...
Again, I thank you very much for your words, and hope that you managed to find some peace with your own situation. I also greatly appreciate your voting sentiments - that made my day! xoxoxoxoxxoo
Comment from CARoseKlix
Very sad. It's just like a man to keep everything all bottled up inside. Good job portraying the character. Good luck in the contest.
Rose
reply by the author on 11-Aug-2008
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Very sad. It's just like a man to keep everything all bottled up inside. Good job portraying the character. Good luck in the contest.
Rose
Comment Written 11-Aug-2008
reply by the author on 11-Aug-2008
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Thanks so much for stopping by and reviewing Rose, I'm glad you enjoyed this one. Thanks so much for the good luck wishes too! xoxoxoxxo
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You are welcome.
Rose
Comment from vertigo50
This is a moving piece of writing. The images are real and speak to all people.
Things have been so different since your Mother up and died
She isn't here to talk to, or come sit with me, outside
The best thing to do is live for today. Ralph Waldo Emerson advised us to live each day and not think back.
Your poem has caused me to remember some philosophy. Emerson also said.
?They who talk much of destiny, their birth-star, etc., are in a lower dangerous plane, and invite the evils they fear.?
Here is something I wrote.
A Philosophy for the Good Life
As seekers after what is noble, beautiful, and just, let us take inspiration and guidance from the following lines by E. E. Hale in Ten Times One Is Ten (1870):
To look up and not down,
To look forward and not back,
To look out and not in, and
To lend a hand.
reply by the author on 01-Aug-2008
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This is a moving piece of writing. The images are real and speak to all people.
Things have been so different since your Mother up and died
She isn't here to talk to, or come sit with me, outside
The best thing to do is live for today. Ralph Waldo Emerson advised us to live each day and not think back.
Your poem has caused me to remember some philosophy. Emerson also said.
?They who talk much of destiny, their birth-star, etc., are in a lower dangerous plane, and invite the evils they fear.?
Here is something I wrote.
A Philosophy for the Good Life
As seekers after what is noble, beautiful, and just, let us take inspiration and guidance from the following lines by E. E. Hale in Ten Times One Is Ten (1870):
To look up and not down,
To look forward and not back,
To look out and not in, and
To lend a hand.
Comment Written 01-Aug-2008
reply by the author on 01-Aug-2008
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G'day again vertigo!
I appreciate your philosophy, although I have to say I'm more into balance, so I guess if I were to re-write this verse, I'd be saying:
To look up, then down, then level your head
look forward, back, then forge ahead
Look out, then in, if in's ok
Then lend a hand, don't run away*
* in other words, help out if your intentions are from purity of heart, not for your own personal gain, or to score browny points.
ANYWAY! This is s'posed to be a reply to a review, so best get to that bit! Thank you, again, for a thoughtful, supportive and encouraging review. I am nodding off a bit - it's getting way past my bed-time, so hope I've made sense. Sorry if I haven't!
Again, thank you muchly. I appreciate your time, comments and support! xoxoxoxoxoxxoo
Comment from bard owl
This poem is extraordinary. It has perfect rhythm and rhyme and the imagery is emotionally charged. Visualization is so easy - two elderly people sitting in their swing enjoying each other's company. Then death claims one, the other left to grieve until he too is called. That he asks for forgiveness of someone unnamed just adds to the utter sadness of the piece. You don't need good luck wishes for the contest. This is a winner. Blessings to you, Linda
reply by the author on 23-Jul-2008
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This poem is extraordinary. It has perfect rhythm and rhyme and the imagery is emotionally charged. Visualization is so easy - two elderly people sitting in their swing enjoying each other's company. Then death claims one, the other left to grieve until he too is called. That he asks for forgiveness of someone unnamed just adds to the utter sadness of the piece. You don't need good luck wishes for the contest. This is a winner. Blessings to you, Linda
Comment Written 23-Jul-2008
reply by the author on 23-Jul-2008
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Well, I can only say a HUGE thank you for this review Linda. Considering it's no longer on the listing, it's a great privilege to get any review at all, let alone one as great as this. Your support is continually consistent, encouraging and something I look forward to each time I post something. I thank you my friend from the bottom of my heart for your words, thoughts, and as said, your continued support. Blessings to you. xoxoxoxoxxo
Comment from Margaret Snowdon
This is a great piece of verse,
albeit oh... so sad.
Cleverly thoughtout and well
presented, with a smooth flow
to the words and to both rhythm
and rhyme.
A sure winner - good luck.
Margaret.
reply by the author on 19-Jul-2008
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This is a great piece of verse,
albeit oh... so sad.
Cleverly thoughtout and well
presented, with a smooth flow
to the words and to both rhythm
and rhyme.
A sure winner - good luck.
Margaret.
Comment Written 19-Jul-2008
reply by the author on 19-Jul-2008
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Thanks so much Margaret. Imagining what it'd be like being in the shoes of the father is what brought this on. I hope this is never something to be faced later on in life...xoxoxoxoxo
Comment from Robbin
A great "Sad poems" contest entry. Very emotional words that were expressed deeply. A sad time, trying to make a mends with what he will leave behind. Pain and suffering alone were described well. Good luck with the contest. Robbin
reply by the author on 19-Jul-2008
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A great "Sad poems" contest entry. Very emotional words that were expressed deeply. A sad time, trying to make a mends with what he will leave behind. Pain and suffering alone were described well. Good luck with the contest. Robbin
Comment Written 19-Jul-2008
reply by the author on 19-Jul-2008
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Thanks so much Robbin for your comments and good luck wishes. Guess this sort of thing happens more than we hear/know about..xoxoxoxoxoxo
Comment from Pen&Ink
Hi alpacalady,
This is a beautiful poem. Yes, we need to make our feelings known, and make amends where needed. One never knows God's timetable.
Ray
reply by the author on 18-Jul-2008
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Hi alpacalady,
This is a beautiful poem. Yes, we need to make our feelings known, and make amends where needed. One never knows God's timetable.
Ray
Comment Written 18-Jul-2008
reply by the author on 18-Jul-2008
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Thanks Pen&Ink for this wonderful review - it is much appreciated! xoxoxoxxo