No - Say It Ain't So!
Viewing comments for Chapter 9 "No! Say It Ain't So!, Ch 11-12"I woke up one morning feeling...
7 total reviews
Comment from Faith Williams
Sorry for skipping over some chapters, Wayne. My youngest brought home the stomach bug from school, and it has made the rounds.
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Suggestions to consider:
"Mr. President, one of the reporters began. I believe there should be quotations following President."
"Speaker Johnson's vote will break all tie," I confidently declared. And even with one absence, the tie goes to the party in power and that's me. Next question." I believe there should be quotations before 'And'.
"Eleven minutes ago. "His aide called a few minutes before that telling us to prepare for the call. Normally we have an hour or so heads up... protocol." The quotations before 'His' can be deleted.
"The Secretary of State interrupted him even as his lips began to reply. "Has there been any notable military action?" The quotations before 'The' can be deleted.
General suggestion:
I like that you added who is speaking at the beginning of each chapter. It's definitely easier for the reader. I would suggest maybe adding a date at the beginning of each chapter. I find it difficult to figure out how much time has passed between events or chapters.
Another interesting chapter. I look forward to seeing how they remove Vance from the picture.
reply by the author on 02-Mar-2025
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Sorry for skipping over some chapters, Wayne. My youngest brought home the stomach bug from school, and it has made the rounds.
Â
Suggestions to consider:
"Mr. President, one of the reporters began. I believe there should be quotations following President."
"Speaker Johnson's vote will break all tie," I confidently declared. And even with one absence, the tie goes to the party in power and that's me. Next question." I believe there should be quotations before 'And'.
"Eleven minutes ago. "His aide called a few minutes before that telling us to prepare for the call. Normally we have an hour or so heads up... protocol." The quotations before 'His' can be deleted.
"The Secretary of State interrupted him even as his lips began to reply. "Has there been any notable military action?" The quotations before 'The' can be deleted.
General suggestion:
I like that you added who is speaking at the beginning of each chapter. It's definitely easier for the reader. I would suggest maybe adding a date at the beginning of each chapter. I find it difficult to figure out how much time has passed between events or chapters.
Another interesting chapter. I look forward to seeing how they remove Vance from the picture.
Comment Written 02-Mar-2025
reply by the author on 02-Mar-2025
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Thank you for your great review. Yes, you got me thinking that day numbers at the start of every chapter (day 1, day 10, day 14, etc).
I remember the days of kids bringing home what was going around. I hope it's all passed.
Best wishes.
Comment from lyenochka
I wish that it were that easy. And really? Putin and Trump can't talk without anyone there? It happened for some time during his first time as president where Putin took him to a private meeting without anyone. And Trump doesn't speak Russian! Maybe that's when he got the injection that makes him a puppet for Russia.
Question: Who is Richard Shephard? And their's an Amos Quick but no Leo Quick. I think the one I'd like resigned is MTG. But maybe you are making up names to avoid any lawsuits?
You probably already fixed:
me inTrump's body. (in Trump's)
reply by the author on 28-Feb-2025
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I wish that it were that easy. And really? Putin and Trump can't talk without anyone there? It happened for some time during his first time as president where Putin took him to a private meeting without anyone. And Trump doesn't speak Russian! Maybe that's when he got the injection that makes him a puppet for Russia.
Question: Who is Richard Shephard? And their's an Amos Quick but no Leo Quick. I think the one I'd like resigned is MTG. But maybe you are making up names to avoid any lawsuits?
You probably already fixed:
me inTrump's body. (in Trump's)
Comment Written 28-Feb-2025
reply by the author on 28-Feb-2025
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Thank you for your fabulous review.
Trump met with Putin in Reykjavik, Iceland in 2017 w/o an American. Following the mtg, Trump took the Russian translator's notes away from him. Soon after that mtg an increase in Russian intelligence assets were murdered. That was the same time that Trump said he believed Russia and Putin over the U. S. Intelligence officers.
Leo and Richard are made-up names. Trump is the only real name I use. He is the only one I wouldn't mind going to jail over. But I'm pretty sure his name is in the public domain.
100% on MTG, but the one I made cry was Boebert. The mileage thing is true. I should have used the incident of the 'Wicked Witch' play.
Thank you for the catches.
Comment from Carol Hillebrenner
Phil does know how to do a good Trump imitation by making no sense that anyone notices. There is a problem with what Trump does when he is in his own body. Today in his talk (snarling at) Zelensky, it was clearly a deranged Trump. And the VP did his share of screwing up. Please Phil, take over Trump permanently before he starts a war or hands our country over to Putin.
reply by the author on 28-Feb-2025
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Phil does know how to do a good Trump imitation by making no sense that anyone notices. There is a problem with what Trump does when he is in his own body. Today in his talk (snarling at) Zelensky, it was clearly a deranged Trump. And the VP did his share of screwing up. Please Phil, take over Trump permanently before he starts a war or hands our country over to Putin.
Comment Written 28-Feb-2025
reply by the author on 28-Feb-2025
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Thank you. I wish I could stay in my tale for sure.
Thank you for your great review and for the six stars!
Comment from Iza Deleanu
This is such a fun read, and what if this will happen in reality, what if T has an evil double, that is doing more damage than your hero. Thank you for sharing and good luck with your writings.
reply by the author on 28-Feb-2025
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This is such a fun read, and what if this will happen in reality, what if T has an evil double, that is doing more damage than your hero. Thank you for sharing and good luck with your writings.
Comment Written 28-Feb-2025
reply by the author on 28-Feb-2025
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Ugh. My imagination only ran to the good possibilities. What if when Trump is finally gone, replaced by a good person he/she was switched with an evildoer? Perish the thought!
Thank you for your great review and for the six stars!!!
Comment from Wendy G
Again, very clever. Sufficient mumbling and crazy talk will mean that no one can tell the difference. Trump the real one was asked about the Aukus agreement with Australia, which is a fairly significant one - he had no clue what it was about. "I don't know anything about it!" he claimed.
Very well done, Wayne. Unfortunately the dramas of real life are never ending.
Wendy
reply by the author on 28-Feb-2025
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Again, very clever. Sufficient mumbling and crazy talk will mean that no one can tell the difference. Trump the real one was asked about the Aukus agreement with Australia, which is a fairly significant one - he had no clue what it was about. "I don't know anything about it!" he claimed.
Very well done, Wayne. Unfortunately the dramas of real life are never ending.
Wendy
Comment Written 28-Feb-2025
reply by the author on 28-Feb-2025
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Thank you. It's hard to stay relevant with the current pace of idiocy.
Thank you for your great review.
Comment from jim vecchio
Your combined series continues very well. Things are a little confusing nd complicated, but not more so than today's actual happenings. I try to avoid the news and watch old classics, even the Three Stooges. Which reminds me of the time I morphed into the Stooges. No, not to Moe, but to Curly, sometimes Shemp, and even Joe Besser once. I always morphed just as Moe was poking their eyes or hitting them in the head. Tht morph lasted for seventeen hours.
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2025
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Your combined series continues very well. Things are a little confusing nd complicated, but not more so than today's actual happenings. I try to avoid the news and watch old classics, even the Three Stooges. Which reminds me of the time I morphed into the Stooges. No, not to Moe, but to Curly, sometimes Shemp, and even Joe Besser once. I always morphed just as Moe was poking their eyes or hitting them in the head. Tht morph lasted for seventeen hours.
Comment Written 27-Feb-2025
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2025
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Seventeen pretty rough hours, I would say!
Thank you for your great review.
Comment from Michael Ludwinder
This is another strong chapter! The tension is sharp. The dialogue feels so natural. The whole switch situation adds a fantastic twist. Especially with how the characters react to it. I also got a kick out of the line about Trump not making the call unassisted. This was a enjoyable read.
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2025
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This is another strong chapter! The tension is sharp. The dialogue feels so natural. The whole switch situation adds a fantastic twist. Especially with how the characters react to it. I also got a kick out of the line about Trump not making the call unassisted. This was a enjoyable read.
Comment Written 27-Feb-2025
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2025
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Thank you so much. I'm trying hard to stay relevant, hoping I can get it all up there before the explosion.
