Reviews from

Burn It All Down

Viewing comments for Chapter 15 "The Inferno"
A war of a few against a syndicate

2 total reviews 
Comment from lancellot
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

An action-packed chapter, with good pacing.

notes:


"We still have this," he stated. Grayson regarded it cautiously,

"You sure you're ready to use it now?" Alex hesitated before responding.

-Recommend separating the speakers and actors here.


"We still have this," he stated.

Grayson regarded it cautiously,

"You sure you're ready to use it now?"

Alex hesitated before responding.


I would also recommend separating their lines at the end.

 Comment Written 18-Jan-2025


reply by the author on 19-Jan-2025
    lol, do you know what happens, when i'm editing, i get into reading the book and forget what i'm doing
Comment from Michael Ludwinder
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Your story pulls me right into the craziness. I loved how the action felt so
intense. The dialogue between Alex and Grayson really stood out. I could picture every moment of the battle. The tension in Alex's decision was gripping. And the way you wrapped it up was just perfect. Great job creating such a thrilling chapter.

 Comment Written 18-Jan-2025


reply by the author on 19-Jan-2025
    more to come