Comment from dragonpoet

Excellent

Hi Steve,
This is a very well written acrostic retelling the old story and reminding us that poverty leads to other bad things, and we must not overlook any of them.
Keep writing and stay heatlhy
Have a wonderful rest of your week.
Joan

 Comment Written 16-Jan-2025

Comment from Marilyn Hamilton

Excellent

An excellent entry for the Acrostic Poetry Contest. Your poem is very clever and imaginative. A Godawful tale of child abuse indeed! LOL Wish I had a 6 left. Good luck in the contest.

 Comment Written 11-Jan-2025

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reply by the author on 12-Jan-2025

Marilyn, thank you for the great review and the virtual six stars - much appreciated.

Steve

Comment from Cecilia A Heiskary

Excellent

Steve,

This is a great acrostic poem. Who knew the old lady beat her kids. Growing up that was a classical fairy tale. They that stuff today and you will land in jail. Her kids wouldn't stop crying, so she gave them something to cry for. Isn't that what all our parents did.

This poem is well organized an flows nicely.

Good luck in the contest.

Cecilia

 Comment Written 11-Jan-2025

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reply by the author on 12-Jan-2025

Thanks, Cecilia. It's always been a slightly disturbing 'story' especially since it is so often recited and taught to small children. Only with the context of the era when such beatings were relatively common can we understand it.

Steve

reply by Cecilia A Heiskary on 12-Jan-2025

You're welcome

Comment from rspoet

Exceptional

Hello Steve,
Marvelous reinterpretation of the old nursery rhyme. It is stunning how cruel
many of the old stories and rhymes were. I think of Hansel and Gretel and the witch who kept kids in cages to later bake them in an oven. A Grimm tale.
Excellent rhythm and rhymes in your expanded acrostic.
Good luck in the contest.
Best wishes.
Robert

 Comment Written 11-Jan-2025

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reply by the author on 12-Jan-2025

Hi, Robert - hope all goes well with you and yours.

Thanks for the kind review. I believe many of the old rhymes and tales were told and retold with the specific intention of being a warning to youngsters, hence Hilaire Belloc's famous Cautionary Tales which parody them like Jim who ran away from Nurse and was eaten by a lion!

I had fun with this, although the damn poem abruptly changed meter all by itself halfway through, so I had to go back and try to fudge up the first half to match with the deadline almost upon me.

Steve

Comment from Elias Noor

Excellent

The poem is a chilling and thought-provoking reinterpretation with vivid imagery and emotional weight. Further exploration of the mother's complexity and slight refinements in tone could elevate it even more.

 Comment Written 11-Jan-2025

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reply by the author on 12-Jan-2025

Thanks, Elias.
I may have been tempted towards a more nuanced exploration of motives etc except for the demands of the Acrostic form!

Steve

Comment from June Sargent

Excellent

In the real world, we would call child protective services, raid the shoe and throw out all the junk she's hoarding, arrest the boyfriend who might just be a pedophile and put her in jail. But it would not make for a pleasant nursery rhyme.

 Comment Written 11-Jan-2025

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reply by the author on 12-Jan-2025

Thanks, June.
Of course the original rhyme was not very pleasant anyway as was the custom of the time when gruesome punishments for badly behaved children were often the subject of bedtime stories!

Steve

Comment from Barry Penfold

Excellent

Certainly a different take on the original. Well done and I hope it does well for you in the contest. Thanks for sharing and take care. Hope you have some space to spare as the shoe has no room to spare.
Cheers
Barry Penfold.

 Comment Written 11-Jan-2025

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reply by the author on 12-Jan-2025

Thanks, Barry.
Try finding the other poem mentioned in my notes for a truly different (and scary) take on the old rhyme.

Steve

Comment from Karen Cherry Threadgill

Excellent

Hopefully she can be offered birth control, and be moved into better housing, and find places for the smaller children at least. In this day and age, with old white men who can never get pregnant trying to abolish abortion, this will start happening everywhere. Whose business is it what I or anybody else wants to do with our own body? You brought this stuff up in me. Karen

 Comment Written 11-Jan-2025

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reply by the author on 12-Jan-2025

Many thanks, Karen.
Yeah, you veered off-track there a little, but yes she could have done with a few morning after pills! I was doing some minor genealogical stuff the other day and came across one family who had thirteen daughters in a row! She popped them out regular as clockwork every two years from about 1880 to 1902

Steve

reply by Karen Cherry Threadgill on 12-Jan-2025

Through the years. a lot of women died, simply because the guy they were married to,wanted a male offspring. I hope this backwards thinking is a thing of the past. Don't you?
Karen

Comment from Y. M. Roger

Excellent

Okay, not sure if I should laugh or cry.... but I must confess to some serious giggles here, sir!! What a wonderful creation! Wish I had another star for you, but know that this has a 'plus' or two on the end (the 'e' in 'olde' notwithstanding - wink, wink!)... Thanx for sharing and best of luck in the contest! ;)

 Comment Written 10-Jan-2025

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reply by the author on 12-Jan-2025

Thank you! I must admit I was a little torn between making this humorous or tragic I appreciate your virtual extra star!

Steve

Comment from artisart4u

Excellent

I like your poem about children getting abused.
I remember the nursery rhyme. Today, broth is good for you and of course a slice of bread can calm the churning in your stomach. At least your stomach has something in it. I don't know if it will suffice all day.
Your acrostic poem is very nice. I like your picture and the old fonts you used to write it.
Good luck in the contest and with your poem as well.

 Comment Written 10-Jan-2025

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reply by the author on 12-Jan-2025

Thank you fn 150 years ago.

Steveor the kind words. The cruelty described in the original rhyme seems very harsh to us today but would have been quite commo