Stray Goat On A Risky Hill
Viewing comments for Chapter 4 "Stray Goat On A Risky Hill-ch. 4"part One
16 total reviews
Comment from Teri7
I wasn't born when the Life of Riley was on. I enjoyed listening to this you put on here for us. I always enjoy your work my friend. Thank you for sharing! Blessings, Teri
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I wasn't born when the Life of Riley was on. I enjoyed listening to this you put on here for us. I always enjoy your work my friend. Thank you for sharing! Blessings, Teri
Comment Written 27-Apr-2024
Comment from Marilyn Hamilton
This is the first I have seen of this story and I am intrigued. I think I need to look up the rest and see where it goes. Your dialogue seems very natural and I might need your help on mine in the short story I just finished. Nicely done.
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This is the first I have seen of this story and I am intrigued. I think I need to look up the rest and see where it goes. Your dialogue seems very natural and I might need your help on mine in the short story I just finished. Nicely done.
Comment Written 27-Apr-2024
Comment from GoWiSt
"Stray Goat On A Risky Hill" Wow, interesting title.
Good complementary picture art choice.
"the Radio station" Either Radio Station, or radio station.
"here are the studio monitor speaker's" Take out the apostrophe in speakers.
"on air light, which is on which means "ssshhhh" Should be 'On Air' light, which when on means "ssshhhh!"
"They're internists at the station" Internists means doctors of internal medicine. So, are Matt and Maury doctors, or did you mean they are interns--newbie, novice, trainee workers at the station?
"but he who steals my brain, steals trash!" Add a closing quotation mark after trash.
"Can we combine our investigation" Investigations--plural.
Hmm! I woner what's up with Matt and Maury. Interesting tale.
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"Stray Goat On A Risky Hill" Wow, interesting title.
Good complementary picture art choice.
"the Radio station" Either Radio Station, or radio station.
"here are the studio monitor speaker's" Take out the apostrophe in speakers.
"on air light, which is on which means "ssshhhh" Should be 'On Air' light, which when on means "ssshhhh!"
"They're internists at the station" Internists means doctors of internal medicine. So, are Matt and Maury doctors, or did you mean they are interns--newbie, novice, trainee workers at the station?
"but he who steals my brain, steals trash!" Add a closing quotation mark after trash.
"Can we combine our investigation" Investigations--plural.
Hmm! I woner what's up with Matt and Maury. Interesting tale.
Comment Written 27-Apr-2024
Comment from CrystieCookie999
I liked reading this. It sounds like Oliver Wendigo's visions add to current mysteries. I had to go look up "The Life of Riley," since it was before my time. I guess it was in the same era as Abbott and Costello, etc. Sounds like it was a great cultural phenomenon as well.
I only have one suggestion:
"I'll give you the "Everything You Wanted To Know tour," Anna laughed.
I think maybe just capitalize Tour. Or else put single quotation marks like this:
"I'll give you the 'Everything You Wanted to Know' tour," Anna laughed.
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I liked reading this. It sounds like Oliver Wendigo's visions add to current mysteries. I had to go look up "The Life of Riley," since it was before my time. I guess it was in the same era as Abbott and Costello, etc. Sounds like it was a great cultural phenomenon as well.
I only have one suggestion:
"I'll give you the "Everything You Wanted To Know tour," Anna laughed.
I think maybe just capitalize Tour. Or else put single quotation marks like this:
"I'll give you the 'Everything You Wanted to Know' tour," Anna laughed.
Comment Written 25-Apr-2024
Comment from nomi338
I enjoyed the reference to comedy form yesteryear. Some of the comedy from that bygone tie is pure, inventive and not that likely to turn the ear red with embarrassment over some of the words that have somehow gained everyday use. I purchased a box set of videos of the Red Skelton show and have made myself nearly sick with sustained laughter.
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I enjoyed the reference to comedy form yesteryear. Some of the comedy from that bygone tie is pure, inventive and not that likely to turn the ear red with embarrassment over some of the words that have somehow gained everyday use. I purchased a box set of videos of the Red Skelton show and have made myself nearly sick with sustained laughter.
Comment Written 25-Apr-2024
Comment from Sanku
I wonder what caused the tingling regarding Matt and Maury. I loved that misquote from Shakespeare very.much .it was funny. I.THINK.I HAVe MISSED ONE CHAPTER. Will go bsvk.and read it
reply by the author on 25-Apr-2024
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I wonder what caused the tingling regarding Matt and Maury. I loved that misquote from Shakespeare very.much .it was funny. I.THINK.I HAVe MISSED ONE CHAPTER. Will go bsvk.and read it
Comment Written 25-Apr-2024
reply by the author on 25-Apr-2024
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Something about what the boys were doing intrigued Wendigo about a past clue. The misquote from Shakespeare was from an actual recording of "Life Of Riley".
Comment from BethShelby
This is good. You write very believable dialogue. I may have missed some episodes of this story. Is this just one case they are trying to solve of a missing child?
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This is good. You write very believable dialogue. I may have missed some episodes of this story. Is this just one case they are trying to solve of a missing child?
Comment Written 25-Apr-2024
Comment from Pearl Edwards
This was a good chapter Jim and an intriguing end
Now I am wondering what it is about Matt and Maury that gave Wendigo the tingles. I remember the song and that radio serial title too. Must be old � good one Jim
Valda
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This was a good chapter Jim and an intriguing end
Now I am wondering what it is about Matt and Maury that gave Wendigo the tingles. I remember the song and that radio serial title too. Must be old � good one Jim
Valda
Comment Written 24-Apr-2024
Comment from royowen
I remember the life of Riley, not the serialised broadcast of it, but rather, the saying, William Bendix was one of my favourite actors. An excellent episode Jim, you're a prolific and gifted writer with a great imagination, well done, blessings Roy
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I remember the life of Riley, not the serialised broadcast of it, but rather, the saying, William Bendix was one of my favourite actors. An excellent episode Jim, you're a prolific and gifted writer with a great imagination, well done, blessings Roy
Comment Written 24-Apr-2024
Comment from Debbie D'Arcy
Well, this was a different and enjoyable read, Jim. Sadly, I'm coming in a bit late but it didn't stop me warming to your characters here and laughing at your Shakespeare quote which is a real keeper! And I'm sure I've heard of that news reporter before:)) Such an imaginative range of work! Well done! Debbie
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Well, this was a different and enjoyable read, Jim. Sadly, I'm coming in a bit late but it didn't stop me warming to your characters here and laughing at your Shakespeare quote which is a real keeper! And I'm sure I've heard of that news reporter before:)) Such an imaginative range of work! Well done! Debbie
Comment Written 24-Apr-2024
