Comment from Liz Dunbee

Excellent

This is wonderful to read and as usual you use visuals to great effect. You certainly used your imagination in this piece. I whole heartedly agree with your last stanza. I am always going off to places all over the universe. The body limits us but our minds have no limits. Well done. Great writing.

 Comment Written 17-Sep-2013

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reply by the author on 20-Sep-2013

Thanks very much for your wonderful review, Liz!

Comment from joneau2

Excellent

Another of your remarkable poems, so professionally written and produced. The background picture is outstanding, as are the other visuals. I do not believe there are many writers as adept at writing as you are.

 Comment Written 17-Sep-2013

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reply by the author on 20-Sep-2013

Thanks so much, Joneau2. I really appreciated your more than kind comments. my friend!

Comment from Tomes Johnston

Excellent

This is a magical journey on the high seas, even if it might only be conjured up by the occipital cortex. This is also the perks of being a writer as well as a reader. You can be transported to a different life and one that is full of adventure.

 Comment Written 17-Sep-2013

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reply by the author on 20-Sep-2013

Hah, yes, the optical cortex is fascinating, Tomes. Thanks for your intelligent review, I do appreciate it!

reply by Tomes Johnston on 24-Sep-2013

My pleasure.

Comment from michaelcahill

Excellent

my friend who is a genius has an occipital lobe that is lit up like a Christmas tree. she is able to solve complex math problems yet she doesn't use math. her answers come to her creatively. hard to explain. she sees her stories in incredible detail. your piece is triggering all this. what you post her is amazing. it really is a feast for ear, eye and mind. I always like to mute the sound and first read your poem to let the words have their time to stand on their own. this is one of your best I think. there is such a real whimsical feel to this and the images are just captivating throughout. now, when you add the rest of the presentation it is amazing and one runs out of adjectives really. just something to stop the hectic running around of the day to day sit back and enjoy. what a treat. thank you so much for the effort and great skill that this takes. regards, mike

 Comment Written 17-Sep-2013

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reply by the author on 20-Sep-2013

Thanks so much for this fantastic review, Mike. It made my night when I finally got the chance to read it. We've been involved in moving as of late, lots to get completed!

Thanks so much again, I truly appreciate it!

Comment from S A Bullen

Exceptional

I've not been on fanstory for very long, but in the last few months, I've watched your style change from your clever macabre to these excellent pieces you are producing now. As I've said before, it is the whole picture you are creating with visuals and audio to complement your poems. Technically, they're excellent and so clever. Sheryn :-)

 Comment Written 17-Sep-2013

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reply by the author on 20-Sep-2013

Thanks so much, Sheryn, as always. I always love getting a review from you!

Comment from Righteous Riter

Excellent

Good rhythm, harmony and flow. Good, strong use of the internal rhyme. Good alliteration and assonance. Great use of words that create a clear image in the mind of the reader. No typos, no errors, no revisions needed.

This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.

 Comment Written 17-Sep-2013

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reply by the author on 20-Sep-2013

Thanks so much, Righteous!