Shore leave
A hallowed eve of tropic joy65 total reviews
Comment from Aussie
Great photo to compliment your poem. Frangipani fragrance (great line) love the perfume. The painted sampan - they paint the evil eye to keep devils away from their family. Mango's drop like flies here, I don't eat them, they have become expensive. I liked the line 'a broken, pink-cheeked, plastic moll.' A magic poem my friend, well done.
reply by the author on 16-Oct-2016
Great photo to compliment your poem. Frangipani fragrance (great line) love the perfume. The painted sampan - they paint the evil eye to keep devils away from their family. Mango's drop like flies here, I don't eat them, they have become expensive. I liked the line 'a broken, pink-cheeked, plastic moll.' A magic poem my friend, well done.
Comment Written 16-Oct-2016
reply by the author on 16-Oct-2016
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Thank you so much for this generous review, Aussie, and for your six-star award. I lived in this part of the world for some time, both as a child and later as an adult in the armed forces, and so I know it quite well. Delighted that I was able to transmit something of the ambiance in this poem. Best wishes, Tony
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Hi Tony, I have visited Hong Kong and felt the ambiance through your poem. Bless you, Kay.
Comment from catch22
Hi T, this is a powerful write and is jam packed with graphic images to go with clever rhyming. What a scene you paint of the blessed and the damned in a shore town. Almost like being stuck in limbo. The description of the children playing with the broken doll was outstanding because it hinted of a loss of innocence the sailors might have gone through, the loss of innocence the children will eventually endure. Haunting write.
reply by the author on 16-Oct-2016
Hi T, this is a powerful write and is jam packed with graphic images to go with clever rhyming. What a scene you paint of the blessed and the damned in a shore town. Almost like being stuck in limbo. The description of the children playing with the broken doll was outstanding because it hinted of a loss of innocence the sailors might have gone through, the loss of innocence the children will eventually endure. Haunting write.
Comment Written 16-Oct-2016
reply by the author on 16-Oct-2016
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Thank you so much for this generous review, Catch22, and for your six-star award. I lived in this part of the world for some time, both as a child and later as an adult in the armed forces, and so I know it quite well. Delighted that I was able to transmit something of the ambiance in this poem. Best wishes, Tony
Comment from BeasPeas
I think you have described it quite well in your well written and rhymed poem. Having traveled the orient while flying for an airline years ago, I marvel then and I marvel now at living in such close proximity and squalor. The intensity of the pungent smells of the rivers is quite stunning. Too many people. Marilyn
reply by the author on 16-Oct-2016
I think you have described it quite well in your well written and rhymed poem. Having traveled the orient while flying for an airline years ago, I marvel then and I marvel now at living in such close proximity and squalor. The intensity of the pungent smells of the rivers is quite stunning. Too many people. Marilyn
Comment Written 16-Oct-2016
reply by the author on 16-Oct-2016
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Thank you so much for this kind review, Marilyn.. I lived in this part of the world for some time, both as a child and later as an adult in the armed forces, and so I know it quite well. Delighted that I was able to echo something of the ambiance in this poem. I particularly remember the Singapore River before it was cleaned up and made into a tourist Mecca! LOL
Best wishes, Tony
Comment from Sandra Stoner-Mitchell
Amazing rhyme scheme to compliment the words you have written, Tony. The picture is well chosen for your poem. What to say about the poem? How can anyone describe the feelings it evokes, but your final stanza brings home the truth of how these urchin children live, their eyes alight upon an amputated doll. It's a poem that makes us really appreciate what we have. Excellent. :) Sandra xx
reply by the author on 16-Oct-2016
Amazing rhyme scheme to compliment the words you have written, Tony. The picture is well chosen for your poem. What to say about the poem? How can anyone describe the feelings it evokes, but your final stanza brings home the truth of how these urchin children live, their eyes alight upon an amputated doll. It's a poem that makes us really appreciate what we have. Excellent. :) Sandra xx
Comment Written 16-Oct-2016
reply by the author on 16-Oct-2016
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Thank you so much for this generous review, Sandra.
I lived in this part of the world for some time, both as a child and later as an adult in the armed forces, and so I know it quite well. Delighted that I was able to transmit something of the ambiance in this poem. The luckier amongst us in the western world are indeed fortunate, though there are those in even the most affluent countries who have more than their fair share of misery. Best wishes, Tony
Comment from johnwilson
Could I give this one hundred stars? yes...This is, for me, one of your best pieces. Every line is littered with word images that entice my imagination. The ending repeated is perfection. (I posted a little fluff of a piece and proceeded to your poem to review. It literally blew me out of myself. I was contented with the paltry offering I had given and was basking in my afterglow. And along came Tony...)
reply by the author on 16-Oct-2016
Could I give this one hundred stars? yes...This is, for me, one of your best pieces. Every line is littered with word images that entice my imagination. The ending repeated is perfection. (I posted a little fluff of a piece and proceeded to your poem to review. It literally blew me out of myself. I was contented with the paltry offering I had given and was basking in my afterglow. And along came Tony...)
Comment Written 16-Oct-2016
reply by the author on 16-Oct-2016
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Thank you so much for this generous review, Jean, and for your six-star award. I lived in this part of the world for some time, both as a child and later as an adult in the armed forces, and so I know it quite well. Delighted that I was able to transmit something of the ambiance in this poem. I must read yours soon. I feel quite sure that you under-rate it! Best wishes, Tony
Comment from joeruptak
I am really not qualified to pass judgment on a writing
of this caliber
all I can say is that I enjoyed this piece immensely
I have been where this poem is talking about
and it made me feel like I was there once more.
Thank you for the moments of pleasure you gave me
great job
reply by the author on 16-Oct-2016
I am really not qualified to pass judgment on a writing
of this caliber
all I can say is that I enjoyed this piece immensely
I have been where this poem is talking about
and it made me feel like I was there once more.
Thank you for the moments of pleasure you gave me
great job
Comment Written 16-Oct-2016
reply by the author on 16-Oct-2016
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Thank you so much for this generous review, Joe. I lived in this part of the world for some time, both as a child and later as an adult in the armed forces, and so I know it quite well. Delighted that I was able to transmit something of the ambiance in this poem. Best wishes, Tony
Comment from Craigitar
You have a very interesting poetic style. Rhyme and meter seem haphazard but somehow work together seamlessly. Fantastic descriptive imagery. The overall feeling I came away with, not being a traveler to exotic places, was of someone lost in a creepy, depressing, alien land. Your poem validates every negative thought I've ever had about traveling. Great writing!
reply by the author on 16-Oct-2016
You have a very interesting poetic style. Rhyme and meter seem haphazard but somehow work together seamlessly. Fantastic descriptive imagery. The overall feeling I came away with, not being a traveler to exotic places, was of someone lost in a creepy, depressing, alien land. Your poem validates every negative thought I've ever had about traveling. Great writing!
Comment Written 16-Oct-2016
reply by the author on 16-Oct-2016
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Thank you so much for this generous review, Craig. I lived in this part of the world for some time, both as a child and later as an adult in the armed forces, and so I know it quite well. Delighted that I was able to transmit something of the ambiance in this poem. Don't be put off travelling. There is nothing like it for broadening one's outlook and understanding of the world in which we live. Best wishes, Tony
Comment from Sandra du Plessis
A very well-written poem. A very strange scene on the shore. The amputated doll and the mango eater draw my attention the most and then the prayer in the moonlight, God always answer our prayers at the right time.
reply by the author on 16-Oct-2016
A very well-written poem. A very strange scene on the shore. The amputated doll and the mango eater draw my attention the most and then the prayer in the moonlight, God always answer our prayers at the right time.
Comment Written 16-Oct-2016
reply by the author on 16-Oct-2016
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Thank you so much for this generous review, Sandra. I lived in this part of the world for some time, both as a child and later as an adult in the armed forces, and so I know it quite well. Sadly, prayers for these people often go unanswered. Best wishes, Tony
Comment from Joy Graham
Your poem brings the picture alive. An exotic location with terrific descriptions. I cringe at the thought of dripping juices on a wedding gown. And that poor amputated doll. Just an ordinary day for the folks living and working in the picture. I like your rhyme style.
reply by the author on 16-Oct-2016
Your poem brings the picture alive. An exotic location with terrific descriptions. I cringe at the thought of dripping juices on a wedding gown. And that poor amputated doll. Just an ordinary day for the folks living and working in the picture. I like your rhyme style.
Comment Written 16-Oct-2016
reply by the author on 16-Oct-2016
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Thank you so much for this generous review, Joy. I lived in this part of the world for some time, both as a child and later as an adult in the armed forces, and so I know it quite well. Delighted that I was able to transmit something of the ambiance in this poem. Best wishes, Tony
Comment from LIJ Red
Poets have long been fascinated by those lands "where there ain't no Ten Commandments." Artwork and all, you pursue a grand tradition with excellent lines.
reply by the author on 16-Oct-2016
Poets have long been fascinated by those lands "where there ain't no Ten Commandments." Artwork and all, you pursue a grand tradition with excellent lines.
Comment Written 16-Oct-2016
reply by the author on 16-Oct-2016
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Thank you so much for your review, Red. I lived in this part of the world for some time, both as a child and later as an adult in the armed forces, and so I know it quite well. I hope that I was able to transmit something of the ambiance in this poem. Best wishes, Tony