Reviews from

2015 Haiku

Viewing comments for Chapter 24 "haiku (flash sonic boom and)"
A collection of haiku I wrote in 2015

66 total reviews 
Comment from MacMhuirich
Excellent
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Wow, this is a wonderfully written haiku, full of imagery in the well chosen wording. The artwork you have chosen and the wording show the entry to be truly 'alive'. Best wishes for the contest.
Bless you
John

 Comment Written 19-Nov-2015


reply by the author on 19-Nov-2015
    Thank you very much for the awesome review. :)
Comment from Jacob Collins
Excellent
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This reminded me of Mary Shelly's Frankenstein, particularly the scene in which Dr Frankenstein makes his monster finally come alive. I thought the imagery was really good in your writing, I liked your choice of words and I thought it flowed well. Good luck in the contest...Jacob

 Comment Written 19-Nov-2015


reply by the author on 19-Nov-2015
    Thank you very much for the awesome review. :) Yes, the satori is a line from frankenstein but it can also be the lightning.
Comment from TomyKan
Excellent
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WELL WRITTEN HAIKU about lightning. The photo is great for your poem. The idea of being alive is interesting. Good luck in the contest.

 Comment Written 19-Nov-2015


reply by the author on 19-Nov-2015
    Thank you very much for the awesome review. :) Have you seen frankenstein?
Comment from scd41
Excellent
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The imagery is as striking as the narration and it is so spectacular that fireworks stand no comparison. Words like sonic boom and electric spark add a scientific touch to a natural event.

 Comment Written 19-Nov-2015


reply by the author on 19-Nov-2015
    Thank you very much for the awesome review. :)
Comment from LIJ Red
Excellent
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Nothing quite singled out a mortal as one who displeased the gods as clearly as being struck by lightning. Ben Franklin and his lightning rod really upset the priests.
I'm weak in Haiku and 5/7/5s but this seems fine to me.

 Comment Written 19-Nov-2015


reply by the author on 19-Nov-2015
    Thank you very much for the awesome review. :)
Comment from danpald
Excellent
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The spark of life comes forth
With the poem in form
So well the meeting of the test
A contest made in quest

Good luck with the contest

 Comment Written 19-Nov-2015


reply by the author on 19-Nov-2015
    Thank you very much for the awesome review. :)
Comment from ProSongwriter
Excellent
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well, you condensed a full chapter of meteorlogical science to 17 syllables that say a lot ... and make sense. You aptly captured the power and awe of the lightening strike. Excellent work ... good luck in the contest!

Alan

 Comment Written 19-Nov-2015


reply by the author on 19-Nov-2015
    Thank you very much for the awesome review. :)
reply by ProSongwriter on 19-Nov-2015
    My pleasure!
Comment from Eric1
Excellent
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Hi Mystery Author, this is a really god entry for this particular competition, wonderfully descriptive words and good imagery should see this do well, I wish you the very best of luck in the contest my friend.

 Comment Written 19-Nov-2015


reply by the author on 19-Nov-2015
    Thank you very much for the awesome review. :)
reply by Eric1 on 19-Nov-2015
    You are welcome my friend.
Comment from giraffmang
Excellent
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Hi there,

I like this very much. Great imagery. The night sky does seem very alive when the lightning strikes. The denouement is excellent and read like a play on the classic 'Frankenstein' motive.

Very clever and well done.

GMG

 Comment Written 19-Nov-2015


reply by the author on 19-Nov-2015
    Thank you very much for the awesome review. :)
Comment from lightink
Excellent
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The imagery is very easy to "see" - it's quite a taster of an experience you're providing here! The satori line makes it even more frightening!

 Comment Written 19-Nov-2015


reply by the author on 19-Nov-2015
    Thank you very much lightink, you are very kind.