Along the Jericho Road
Viewing comments for Chapter 49 "Sunkothai Moon, Part One"Murder Mystery
52 total reviews
Comment from TOMORAL
You have an interesting cast of characters here and an awesome storyline going. Not really familiar with your people here but I learned a lot about them from your spot on descriptions throughout. Excellent writing.
reply by the author on 21-Nov-2013
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You have an interesting cast of characters here and an awesome storyline going. Not really familiar with your people here but I learned a lot about them from your spot on descriptions throughout. Excellent writing.
Comment Written 21-Nov-2013
reply by the author on 21-Nov-2013
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Thank you so much, Tomoral. I really appreciate you stopping by to read my chapter and your shared insights. Warm regards, Bev
Comment from CR Delport
As always, this is very well written and makes for a great read. You depict Jana's inner struggle very well. Another great chapter. I found no obvious errors.
reply by the author on 21-Nov-2013
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As always, this is very well written and makes for a great read. You depict Jana's inner struggle very well. Another great chapter. I found no obvious errors.
Comment Written 20-Nov-2013
reply by the author on 21-Nov-2013
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Thank you, Christie. I've been way behind both in writing and reviewing. I hope to catch up soon. Thank you for taking time to review so generously. Warm regards, Bev
Comment from sweetwoodjax
this is very well written, writingfundimension, you did an excellent job writing this chapter. a little detail, but needed to find out the background of jana and dred's relationship plus the attitude of the owner of the bar
reply by the author on 21-Nov-2013
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this is very well written, writingfundimension, you did an excellent job writing this chapter. a little detail, but needed to find out the background of jana and dred's relationship plus the attitude of the owner of the bar
Comment Written 20-Nov-2013
reply by the author on 21-Nov-2013
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Thank you, my friend, for your generous and supportive review. I appreciate that you've stuck with me on this novel, sweet.
Warm regards, Bev
Comment from Connie C
You've written another chapter, Bev, with such excellent description. You make it so easy to see the scenario. Your third paragraph, for example, offers up some good description of the rain, the cold, and the heavy traffic. The description of the pub is also excellent. And, being somewhat of a romantic, I like how you let us know that the bartender has a thing for Jana and that Dred still has feelings for her. Hmmm. . . I wonder where this is going. Can't wait to read more. As always, so deserving of a six.
Hugs,
Connie
reply by the author on 21-Nov-2013
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You've written another chapter, Bev, with such excellent description. You make it so easy to see the scenario. Your third paragraph, for example, offers up some good description of the rain, the cold, and the heavy traffic. The description of the pub is also excellent. And, being somewhat of a romantic, I like how you let us know that the bartender has a thing for Jana and that Dred still has feelings for her. Hmmm. . . I wonder where this is going. Can't wait to read more. As always, so deserving of a six.
Hugs,
Connie
Comment Written 20-Nov-2013
reply by the author on 21-Nov-2013
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Aw, Connie, you know how to make me feel like a million bucks! I'm not much of a romance writer, but I'm trying to learn. So, your feedback is especially helpful. I do appreciate you! Hugs, Bev
Comment from pickthorn
Ah the green eyed god of jealousy rears its head. I will bet that Jana falls back under the spell of Dred... I wonder if Donal can intercede and convince her that he is the guy for her. :o) Maybe I better wait and see. This is a good chapter.. I'm anxious for the next one.
pickthorn
reply by the author on 20-Nov-2013
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Ah the green eyed god of jealousy rears its head. I will bet that Jana falls back under the spell of Dred... I wonder if Donal can intercede and convince her that he is the guy for her. :o) Maybe I better wait and see. This is a good chapter.. I'm anxious for the next one.
pickthorn
Comment Written 20-Nov-2013
reply by the author on 20-Nov-2013
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Thanks so much, Gary, for this very generous and kind review. Glad the storyline is holding your interest. Warm regards, Bev
Comment from barkingdog
This is a new turn of events in your mystery. We learn a more about the detectives' private lives.
So we have a little tension brewing as the love interests develope.
Jana is still wary of Dred. He still loves her. Then we have Donai who is also interested in Jana and visually stakes his claim on her with Dred.
I look forward to see where this is going. :) ellen
reply by the author on 20-Nov-2013
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This is a new turn of events in your mystery. We learn a more about the detectives' private lives.
So we have a little tension brewing as the love interests develope.
Jana is still wary of Dred. He still loves her. Then we have Donai who is also interested in Jana and visually stakes his claim on her with Dred.
I look forward to see where this is going. :) ellen
Comment Written 20-Nov-2013
reply by the author on 20-Nov-2013
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I do, too LOL. Just kidding. Thank you so much, Ellen, for your continued interest and support. Your six-star review means a lot coming from someone whose writing I admire. Warmest regards, Bev
Comment from allborn66
This is a very interesting piece. I liked the tension in the piece. The characters interact well with each other. You have a good voice.
Barbara
reply by the author on 20-Nov-2013
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This is a very interesting piece. I liked the tension in the piece. The characters interact well with each other. You have a good voice.
Barbara
Comment Written 20-Nov-2013
reply by the author on 20-Nov-2013
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Thank you very much, Barbara. :0) Bev
Comment from ericawrites
A very interesting chapter. Your characters are depicted
well, the story draws the reader in and holds the
attention to the end.
Typo:
the Tas(k) Force
reply by the author on 20-Nov-2013
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A very interesting chapter. Your characters are depicted
well, the story draws the reader in and holds the
attention to the end.
Typo:
the Tas(k) Force
Comment Written 20-Nov-2013
reply by the author on 20-Nov-2013
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Thank you very much, Erica. I'll make the correction :0)
Comment from Joan E.
I enjoyed your opening this new chapter with a bit of banter to reestablish the scene. Your choice of the "scab" metaphor and "physician" simile, along with the sioux terms was vivid and effective. You deftly left us in suspense... Cheers- Joan
reply by the author on 20-Nov-2013
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I enjoyed your opening this new chapter with a bit of banter to reestablish the scene. Your choice of the "scab" metaphor and "physician" simile, along with the sioux terms was vivid and effective. You deftly left us in suspense... Cheers- Joan
Comment Written 20-Nov-2013
reply by the author on 20-Nov-2013
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Thanks so much, Joan. I appreciate your generous and encouraging review. Warm regards, Bev
Comment from jmdg1954
I have not had the priviledge to read any of the prior chapters. Taking this one by itself, I may want to read the ones that follow. I like the interspersing of foreign words (terms) throughout. This was a short piece that kept my interest, especially after she entered the bar and Donal had his eye on her.
Nicely done... John
reply by the author on 20-Nov-2013
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I have not had the priviledge to read any of the prior chapters. Taking this one by itself, I may want to read the ones that follow. I like the interspersing of foreign words (terms) throughout. This was a short piece that kept my interest, especially after she entered the bar and Donal had his eye on her.
Nicely done... John
Comment Written 20-Nov-2013
reply by the author on 20-Nov-2013
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Hiya, John. Thank you for this gracious and generous review. It's daunting to come into a novel that's progressed as far as this one has. That you took the time to read is enough for me. Appreciate it! Bev