~Your Heart's in My Hands~
Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned...36 total reviews
Comment from mellmom1
I loved it! Very good job. I liked how you painted a picture of the story without a lot of unnecessary words. The words flowed well and we got the picture of the heart removal, without too much gore. Keep up the good work. New Fan!!
reply by the author on 08-Dec-2013
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I loved it! Very good job. I liked how you painted a picture of the story without a lot of unnecessary words. The words flowed well and we got the picture of the heart removal, without too much gore. Keep up the good work. New Fan!!
Comment Written 07-Dec-2013
reply by the author on 08-Dec-2013
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Well, thank you so much, mellmom1, I really appreciate that!
I am very happy that you liked the story, and that it entertained you. That's the main reason I am here, just to entertain, hopefully, LOL...
Thanks again!
Comment from Glasstruth
I first read your author notes, very interesting. Thought that this would be about Bell Sorenson Gunness, but when I read the line about texting realised it's not 1900. Still, a very bloody good story. Well done! Les
reply by the author on 07-Dec-2013
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I first read your author notes, very interesting. Thought that this would be about Bell Sorenson Gunness, but when I read the line about texting realised it's not 1900. Still, a very bloody good story. Well done! Les
Comment Written 07-Dec-2013
reply by the author on 07-Dec-2013
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Thanks, Les. Much obliged!
Comment from c_lucas
It's a known fact that some people lose their head and heart over love. This is well written with a smooth flow of words, making for a good read.
reply by the author on 07-Dec-2013
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It's a known fact that some people lose their head and heart over love. This is well written with a smooth flow of words, making for a good read.
Comment Written 07-Dec-2013
reply by the author on 07-Dec-2013
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Thanks, Mr. Lucas. Much obliged!
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You're welcome. Charlie
Comment from debskatz
Hi author,
Wow! A very interesting story. And then to find out it's based on real life is a true plus!
My only crit would be the progression from the first paragraph to the second. Maybe start the second with Amanda thinking back. Right now, it's in present tense and seems to continue from the previous paragraph. Hope this makes sense!
Anyway, good story. Thanks for sharing!
smiles,
deb
reply by the author on 07-Dec-2013
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Hi author,
Wow! A very interesting story. And then to find out it's based on real life is a true plus!
My only crit would be the progression from the first paragraph to the second. Maybe start the second with Amanda thinking back. Right now, it's in present tense and seems to continue from the previous paragraph. Hope this makes sense!
Anyway, good story. Thanks for sharing!
smiles,
deb
Comment Written 07-Dec-2013
reply by the author on 07-Dec-2013
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It does, Deb, and thanks very much for the review as well as the suggestion. All are very much appreciated...
Comment from JD Storms
Scary and should be a warning to anyone who plays games with the hearts of other people :-) Well written, I enjoyed this, chilling :-)
reply by the author on 07-Dec-2013
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Scary and should be a warning to anyone who plays games with the hearts of other people :-) Well written, I enjoyed this, chilling :-)
Comment Written 07-Dec-2013
reply by the author on 07-Dec-2013
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Thanks a million, JD Storms. I really appreciate the excellent review, and I am very glad that you liked it.
Comment from boxergirl
Wish I had a sixer for you, Dean. This is definitely a great flash fiction piece for the contest. The screaming at the beginning sets the tone of fear before I even started reading. lol
Then the imagery created by your descriptions were way too realistic, so even though I knew what was going to happen to him, it still kept me engaged.
Then when you think it's over, we realize she's coming after Lyra! Good one, for sure. Thanks also for adding the info about the Lonely Hearts Killer. It complements your story well. BG 8-)
reply by the author on 07-Dec-2013
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Wish I had a sixer for you, Dean. This is definitely a great flash fiction piece for the contest. The screaming at the beginning sets the tone of fear before I even started reading. lol
Then the imagery created by your descriptions were way too realistic, so even though I knew what was going to happen to him, it still kept me engaged.
Then when you think it's over, we realize she's coming after Lyra! Good one, for sure. Thanks also for adding the info about the Lonely Hearts Killer. It complements your story well. BG 8-)
Comment Written 07-Dec-2013
reply by the author on 07-Dec-2013
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Thanks so much, boxergirl. And please vote, if not for this entry, then for one of the other fabulous entries in this prompt. Lots of hard work was poured into these short stories, you can tell!
Thanks again...
:]
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Will do!
Comment from elchupakabra
This was an excellent story. It was particularly enjoyable because of the author's notes and the story of Belle. I thought the cliffhanger you left at the end, the killer under the mistress' window, stalking her prey. I loved it, the character's felt very real and there was an ominous and foreboding sense to the work as a whole. Really great work here, best of luck in the contest, thanks for sharing oh great mystery writer ;) lol.
reply by the author on 07-Dec-2013
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This was an excellent story. It was particularly enjoyable because of the author's notes and the story of Belle. I thought the cliffhanger you left at the end, the killer under the mistress' window, stalking her prey. I loved it, the character's felt very real and there was an ominous and foreboding sense to the work as a whole. Really great work here, best of luck in the contest, thanks for sharing oh great mystery writer ;) lol.
Comment Written 07-Dec-2013
reply by the author on 07-Dec-2013
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Hah, thanks, 'Chup. I don't know where it stands. I hate to have to vote for a competitor to see the standings, so I refuse to do so. I have a feeling, though, that a story called "They Like to Hide" is winning. Just call it a hunch...
Comment from L.A.Matthies
This certainly exemplifies the saying " "Heaven has no rage like love to hatred turned, Nor hell a fury like a woman scorned."
My goodness, you've penned a most entertaining and macabre story ...I enjoyed it immensely!
reply by the author on 07-Dec-2013
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This certainly exemplifies the saying " "Heaven has no rage like love to hatred turned, Nor hell a fury like a woman scorned."
My goodness, you've penned a most entertaining and macabre story ...I enjoyed it immensely!
Comment Written 07-Dec-2013
reply by the author on 07-Dec-2013
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Thanks you so much for your kind, thoughtful comments and review, L.A. Matthies. Much obliged!
Comment from Gooloom
What a woman. Akiller and a pretty fatalistic one at that.story is gruesome but never mind we had been warned and yet we continue to read such stories. so she takes her revenge and he is done for. well u have written well bringing out the horror of it allvery distinctly. U desrve a pat on the back for the plot .gooloom
reply by the author on 07-Dec-2013
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What a woman. Akiller and a pretty fatalistic one at that.story is gruesome but never mind we had been warned and yet we continue to read such stories. so she takes her revenge and he is done for. well u have written well bringing out the horror of it allvery distinctly. U desrve a pat on the back for the plot .gooloom
Comment Written 07-Dec-2013
reply by the author on 07-Dec-2013
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Thanks a million for such a fantastic review, .gooloom. I'm really honored that you liked it, my friend!
Comment from Dawn Munro
Oh, this was truly horrifying, and so well-plotted and paced! I am going to have to stop reviewing so late at night though (or should I say early in the morning - it's 3:30 right now) - I've been caught by the sound effects at full volume. (*smile*) My neighbor is sleeping - my apartment conducts sound well into his...hmmm...:)
This is an outstanding presentation - unfortunately I have no sixes left this week.
Best of luck with this fabulous story. ***********
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Oh, this was truly horrifying, and so well-plotted and paced! I am going to have to stop reviewing so late at night though (or should I say early in the morning - it's 3:30 right now) - I've been caught by the sound effects at full volume. (*smile*) My neighbor is sleeping - my apartment conducts sound well into his...hmmm...:)
This is an outstanding presentation - unfortunately I have no sixes left this week.
Best of luck with this fabulous story. ***********
Comment Written 07-Dec-2013