Along the Jericho Road
Viewing comments for Chapter 24 "Aze Moon"Murder Mystery
39 total reviews
Comment from hyway94
I made a mistake, now I have to go back and read the first chapters. What a great chapter. I've been away for awhile and now I find all these stories being posted and I have to go back and read the chapters. This was very good. No mistakes that I could see. The flow made you think you were sitting there listing. Again, very good, keep it up.
reply by the author on 11-Nov-2012
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I made a mistake, now I have to go back and read the first chapters. What a great chapter. I've been away for awhile and now I find all these stories being posted and I have to go back and read the chapters. This was very good. No mistakes that I could see. The flow made you think you were sitting there listing. Again, very good, keep it up.
Comment Written 11-Nov-2012
reply by the author on 11-Nov-2012
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Thanks so much for your wonderful review, hyway94. I really appreciate you choosing to read my chapter. As you say, there's some great reading out there! Warmest regards, Bev
Comment from JW
This is another well written chapter. No spags where found, and it easily holds a reader's interest as it progresses the overall storyline. Good job.
Thanks for sharing this. JW. :-)
reply by the author on 11-Nov-2012
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This is another well written chapter. No spags where found, and it easily holds a reader's interest as it progresses the overall storyline. Good job.
Thanks for sharing this. JW. :-)
Comment Written 11-Nov-2012
reply by the author on 11-Nov-2012
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Thank you much, Jonathon. I really appreciate your generous review and choice to read my chapter. Warm regards, Bev
Comment from Joy Graham
I got an eerie feeling reading this chapter. You have me befuddled. I hope this man isn't the latest victim.
"except for a patrolmen"- patroman
reply by the author on 11-Nov-2012
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I got an eerie feeling reading this chapter. You have me befuddled. I hope this man isn't the latest victim.
"except for a patrolmen"- patroman
Comment Written 11-Nov-2012
reply by the author on 11-Nov-2012
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Thank you so much, Joy. I appreciate the review and cathing the spag! Hugs, Bev
Comment from misscookie
Another interesting chapter.
I like how your story moves
You once again kept me on the enge of my chair.
thank you for sharing.
reply by the author on 11-Nov-2012
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Another interesting chapter.
I like how your story moves
You once again kept me on the enge of my chair.
thank you for sharing.
Comment Written 11-Nov-2012
reply by the author on 11-Nov-2012
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Hi, misscookie. Thank you much for taking time to read my chapter and send along your generous review. I really appreciate the support.
Hugs, Bev
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Your very welcome.
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:0) XXX
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Have a nice evening
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You two, lovely lady!
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You are very welcome.Have a blessed Monday.
Comment from barkingdog
Another top notch chapter, Bev. I love the final line. 'I'm going to make you famous.'
Poor Mr. Buell. He seemed like a well meaning old man visiting his wife's grave. Now, I'm curious how he fits into the chain of murders.
It's getting more involved and has much more tension.
I like that you have the priest back in action and his housekeeper has evidence. He's back in charge of the action.
I'm only taking a little time out from Nanowrimo to review a few folks, so excuse me if this is short. It is fabulous. Dialogue, pacing and especially your last scene. I felt sorry for the Mr. Buell and wondered his connection. Maybe, the housekeeper's info is a key.
You are so good at this. A regular Miss Marple mystery is what this reminds me of with the minister being the detective.
I'm glad I waited, because the site let me release a six--unlike yesterday.
reply by the author on 11-Nov-2012
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Another top notch chapter, Bev. I love the final line. 'I'm going to make you famous.'
Poor Mr. Buell. He seemed like a well meaning old man visiting his wife's grave. Now, I'm curious how he fits into the chain of murders.
It's getting more involved and has much more tension.
I like that you have the priest back in action and his housekeeper has evidence. He's back in charge of the action.
I'm only taking a little time out from Nanowrimo to review a few folks, so excuse me if this is short. It is fabulous. Dialogue, pacing and especially your last scene. I felt sorry for the Mr. Buell and wondered his connection. Maybe, the housekeeper's info is a key.
You are so good at this. A regular Miss Marple mystery is what this reminds me of with the minister being the detective.
I'm glad I waited, because the site let me release a six--unlike yesterday.
Comment Written 11-Nov-2012
reply by the author on 11-Nov-2012
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Hi, Ellen. It's so kind of you to wait until Sunday to review. What a generous thing for you to do. And I have been wondering about your nanowrimo. Are you enjoying the process?
A special thanks, then, for taking time read since you're pouring so much energy into that project. Your insights and intuition about the chapters are always so helpful,
Hugs, Bev
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You're so welcome. I'll be more help when the nano is over.It's fine but I miss editing as I go. Editing helps me fill in the characters and setting in my mind. I'm not enjoying writing a skeleton. I hope it will fill out well before I post.
I love what you are doing with this story. I have no idea who did what to cause the who-ever-he-is bad guy to be a serial killer. And how are all these deaths related. You are getting better and better with each chapter.Fantastic energy!!!!
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Aw, Ellen, you always know just the right thing to say to make me feel great. I so appreciate your intuition and kindness. Love ya, Bev
Comment from Connie C
As you often do with these chapters, Bev, you leave us hanging. And that's a good thing since I want to know who is attacking Fritz. Guess I'll have to wait to find out. I don't recall Fritz from an earlier chapter--hope I'm not losing track of the characters. It helps that you include them in your author notes. As always, your use of dialogue is excellent. Great job, my friend, and worthy of a six if FS would just let me do so. I have one sixer left for the week and would so love to give to you.
Hugs,
Connie
reply by the author on 10-Nov-2012
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As you often do with these chapters, Bev, you leave us hanging. And that's a good thing since I want to know who is attacking Fritz. Guess I'll have to wait to find out. I don't recall Fritz from an earlier chapter--hope I'm not losing track of the characters. It helps that you include them in your author notes. As always, your use of dialogue is excellent. Great job, my friend, and worthy of a six if FS would just let me do so. I have one sixer left for the week and would so love to give to you.
Hugs,
Connie
Comment Written 10-Nov-2012
reply by the author on 10-Nov-2012
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Hi, Connie. What a gracious and lovely review. You're always so encouraging, my friend. Fritz did make his debut in this chapter, so you haven't missed a thing LOL. I so appreciate your wonderfully generous review and your supportive words are worth that extra star to me, Connie. Hugs, Bev
Comment from Maureen's Pen
Hi Bev,
As I finished off your last words what popped out of my mouth was "Oh God!" Then I quickly looked up and around to make sure no lightning bolts were coming my way. And then I thought why am I reading this at night? It was scary but man those possibilities just do me in. It's like the music in scary movies, I want to hide behind the pillows and plug my ears.
Well penned though I rambled some. Just making sure my doors and windows are locked.
Excellent work and great hook for the next post.
Thanks for sharing sort of....:)
Maureen
reply by the author on 10-Nov-2012
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Hi Bev,
As I finished off your last words what popped out of my mouth was "Oh God!" Then I quickly looked up and around to make sure no lightning bolts were coming my way. And then I thought why am I reading this at night? It was scary but man those possibilities just do me in. It's like the music in scary movies, I want to hide behind the pillows and plug my ears.
Well penned though I rambled some. Just making sure my doors and windows are locked.
Excellent work and great hook for the next post.
Thanks for sharing sort of....:)
Maureen
Comment Written 10-Nov-2012
reply by the author on 10-Nov-2012
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Hi, Maureen. What a great review! And you make a great point. Can you imagine if we could have accompanying music while reading? Wow, the possibilities.
I so appreciate your generous and supportive review, my friend. You're always so good to me!
Love ya, Bev
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LOL Don't even think of those music possibilities! It's always my imagination that gets me into trouble.
Now I'll need to count firemen before I fall off to sleep.:P
Love ya back
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HAHAHA ... have never tried that! You have such a great sense of humor, Maureen. XX
Comment from Littlegirl38732
I love this whole story - everything I have read of it. I look forward to reading the future chapters. I just know this has got to be on the market! Thank you for posting.
reply by the author on 10-Nov-2012
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I love this whole story - everything I have read of it. I look forward to reading the future chapters. I just know this has got to be on the market! Thank you for posting.
Comment Written 10-Nov-2012
reply by the author on 10-Nov-2012
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Thank you so much, Littlegirl. I am very appreciative of your gracious and generous review. Warm regards, Bev
Comment from jjstar
Oh, this was simply EXCEPTIONAL! I loved every bit of it..especially the ending. What an image of the older man being attacked by his wife's grave while a blue jay watches. I hope I can six you...come on six! Damn it! Here it is Saturday night and I even have a six left to give out..sorry..but looks like I've sixed you too recently! Arghhhh...
Epstein had split up the voluminous amounts of hearsay evidence==ugh...can just see it stacked up..
unprepared for the emotional ambush of her heart.===oh! what a great line/description..that is what it is...total emotional whack..
caressed a fingertip across==hmmm...for some reason this just sounds a little weird..sorry..maybe his fingertip caressed the sandy brown hair? I somehow just can't see the him caressing his fingertip? Maybe it's just me..lol..a little off my game tonight. The elections have made me a little insane!
provoking a rage that jerked her out of her neutral zone.===LOVE LOVE LOVE THIS!
Loved the internal dialogue..your first trip to hell, shit and touche..great touch!
Love the image of her strength to turn the picture over in the midst of being an emotional mess..Great!
The Monsignor reminds me of one of the jungle cats at the Minnesota Zoo,===very telling detail
The older Catholics were taught that priests hold a direct line to God."===SOOOOO TRUE!!!!!!
reply by the author on 10-Nov-2012
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Oh, this was simply EXCEPTIONAL! I loved every bit of it..especially the ending. What an image of the older man being attacked by his wife's grave while a blue jay watches. I hope I can six you...come on six! Damn it! Here it is Saturday night and I even have a six left to give out..sorry..but looks like I've sixed you too recently! Arghhhh...
Epstein had split up the voluminous amounts of hearsay evidence==ugh...can just see it stacked up..
unprepared for the emotional ambush of her heart.===oh! what a great line/description..that is what it is...total emotional whack..
caressed a fingertip across==hmmm...for some reason this just sounds a little weird..sorry..maybe his fingertip caressed the sandy brown hair? I somehow just can't see the him caressing his fingertip? Maybe it's just me..lol..a little off my game tonight. The elections have made me a little insane!
provoking a rage that jerked her out of her neutral zone.===LOVE LOVE LOVE THIS!
Loved the internal dialogue..your first trip to hell, shit and touche..great touch!
Love the image of her strength to turn the picture over in the midst of being an emotional mess..Great!
The Monsignor reminds me of one of the jungle cats at the Minnesota Zoo,===very telling detail
The older Catholics were taught that priests hold a direct line to God."===SOOOOO TRUE!!!!!!
Comment Written 10-Nov-2012
reply by the author on 10-Nov-2012
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Hiya, jj. What a fantabulous review. Thank you much for sharing your specific viewpoints and insights. I've changed the section you mention - you are right! And I so apprecite your wish for a six. Truly, your words are totally inspiring and I thank you from the heart. Hugs, Bev
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You're so welcome..what are we going to do about this six problem..I think they need to change that. Anyway, I'm trying to get a clue about where to go with my story from you. I was just telling Norbanus that you two are stopping me from writing because of your great action. I'm so addicted to both of your stories, I'm bored by mine. You are inspiring me to drum up some action. Love it!
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You're so sweet, jj. Norbanus is an inspiring writer, for sure. I've learned from reading his chapters, as well. But you are writing for a unique genre, and I think you are doing great, really!! Hugs, Bev
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Aw, thanks..I'll see if I can get inspired tomorrow to get off my butt and think of something...:)
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Just keep doin' what you're doin' and you'll be great! :0) XXX
Comment from wordsfromsue
Holy moly Bev. I'm thinking the janitor knew of the abuse going on maybe and didn't stop it? I guess the old man IS terrified, he's pretty sure what's ahead for him isn't going to be pretty. :-(
The killer's rage has had an awfully long time to build up. I wouldn't want to be one of his targets.
Absolutely terrific chapter Bev.
reply by the author on 10-Nov-2012
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Holy moly Bev. I'm thinking the janitor knew of the abuse going on maybe and didn't stop it? I guess the old man IS terrified, he's pretty sure what's ahead for him isn't going to be pretty. :-(
The killer's rage has had an awfully long time to build up. I wouldn't want to be one of his targets.
Absolutely terrific chapter Bev.
Comment Written 10-Nov-2012
reply by the author on 10-Nov-2012
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You got it, Sue! Thank you so very much for this superb review. I sure appreciate your generosity and support, my friend. Hugs, Bev