This Time - That Time 3
Viewing comments for Chapter 5 "The Discovery"Third book in the time travel trilogy
26 total reviews
Comment from BeasPeas
Your written is so well done, Sandra. Logical and well put together. Flows well. The concept of time traveling in your story is unique and I like that you use time periods to define the era for us. I must admit that I'm not fond at all of the word "gobsmacked." However, that is incidental to the fine chapter you've penned here. Marilyn
reply by the author on 17-Sep-2018
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Your written is so well done, Sandra. Logical and well put together. Flows well. The concept of time traveling in your story is unique and I like that you use time periods to define the era for us. I must admit that I'm not fond at all of the word "gobsmacked." However, that is incidental to the fine chapter you've penned here. Marilyn
Comment Written 16-Sep-2018
reply by the author on 17-Sep-2018
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Thank you so much, Marilyn, for your lovely review. I'm having second thoughts with that word, too. I does seem out of place with my characters. I'll change it. Thanks for raising that, you have been the only one, but I have to agree with you. :)) Sandra xx
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Hi Sandra. Thank you for agreeing with me on that word. Your writing is classy. That word just doesn't fit. There is surely another that is in keeping with your style. Just my opinion, though, you are the writer and a good one. Marilyn
Comment from rwilliam
I enjoyed reading this chapter.
I'm still trying to wrap my head around Mildred being alive again but still seen and eating and drinking like normal.
You have me guessing on what the reason is for their time travel, well done. I'm intrigued. Good job. :-)
reply by the author on 17-Sep-2018
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I enjoyed reading this chapter.
I'm still trying to wrap my head around Mildred being alive again but still seen and eating and drinking like normal.
You have me guessing on what the reason is for their time travel, well done. I'm intrigued. Good job. :-)
Comment Written 16-Sep-2018
reply by the author on 17-Sep-2018
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Hi, Rebecca, thank you for sharing your thoughts on this. You will learn more about Mildred as the story unfolds, and you will have a surprise, too. I think I'll add a little clue in my final edit, that will, iif not totally explain it, will make the reader more able to accept it. :)) I can't say any more at the moment, you'll just have to wait and see!!! LOL. The reason for this trip will become clear very soon. Big hugs, my friend. :)) Sandra. xxx
Comment from Gert sherwood
Hello sandramitchell
I know one thing about your book The Discovery with you telling us of how--
Veronica and Mildred in the year 1996 are taken back in time to 1905 to meet a family.
Now in this chapter I liked when both girls went to the library and searching for the history to see if there would be another Vice Admiral Charles Pembrock.
And of the way that I believe is Mildred send her back in time invisible in you next chapter.
Gert
reply by the author on 17-Sep-2018
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Hello sandramitchell
I know one thing about your book The Discovery with you telling us of how--
Veronica and Mildred in the year 1996 are taken back in time to 1905 to meet a family.
Now in this chapter I liked when both girls went to the library and searching for the history to see if there would be another Vice Admiral Charles Pembrock.
And of the way that I believe is Mildred send her back in time invisible in you next chapter.
Gert
Comment Written 16-Sep-2018
reply by the author on 17-Sep-2018
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Thank you so much, Gert, for the lovely 6 stars, that is so kind of you. More will be revealed soon, and then Veronica will have her work cut out for her. It won't be easy. :)) Thank you, my friend. :) Sandra xxx
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You are welcome Sandra
Gert
Comment from royowen
The powers-that-be have decided, being phased by the sheer brutality of the Vice-Admiral that his violence is a variable that could change the time line on the future, so decide in their infinite wisdom to make Veronica invisible and Mildred visible, because oth their unique abilities. Back in their own time, they go and research some facts on Gladys and gpheh awful husband, well done, Sandra, excellent episode, blessings, Roy
reply by the author on 17-Sep-2018
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The powers-that-be have decided, being phased by the sheer brutality of the Vice-Admiral that his violence is a variable that could change the time line on the future, so decide in their infinite wisdom to make Veronica invisible and Mildred visible, because oth their unique abilities. Back in their own time, they go and research some facts on Gladys and gpheh awful husband, well done, Sandra, excellent episode, blessings, Roy
Comment Written 16-Sep-2018
reply by the author on 17-Sep-2018
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Thank you so much, my dear Roy, for this lovely review. I always appreciate what you have to say. You have always been so kind to my writing. Thank you! Big hugs, my friend. :)) Sandra xx
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Well done Sandra
Comment from Beck Fenton
Doing very well on the story. I'm enjoying Jowell (Is it pronounced Joel? I want to read it Jowl like sagging cheeks. LOL)
I had a bit to figure out Mildred was speaking in this part... " I watched as Mildred stood up, picked up her tea-cup, and then put it back on the table before sitting down again. 'Tis just a thought, but perhaps we should see if there's any record of the Vice Admiral that might shed some light on all this. You don't know. We're just guessin' it's t' do with him and his abusive ways. We might be right off the mark.'
Otherwise, sail on!
reply by the author on 17-Sep-2018
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Doing very well on the story. I'm enjoying Jowell (Is it pronounced Joel? I want to read it Jowl like sagging cheeks. LOL)
I had a bit to figure out Mildred was speaking in this part... " I watched as Mildred stood up, picked up her tea-cup, and then put it back on the table before sitting down again. 'Tis just a thought, but perhaps we should see if there's any record of the Vice Admiral that might shed some light on all this. You don't know. We're just guessin' it's t' do with him and his abusive ways. We might be right off the mark.'
Otherwise, sail on!
Comment Written 16-Sep-2018
reply by the author on 17-Sep-2018
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LOL! I can see how you would, but it is pronounced, Jo well. I heard it on the radio, can't remember what it was about, but I thought it would make a good name for one of my characters. I'll have a look at that sentence and see what I can do to make it more obvious that Mildred is speaking. I can see why, now you've pointed it out. Thank you, my friend. Your review is lovely and very helpful, too. I do appreciate the thought you have put into it. Big hugs, my friend. :)) Sandra xx
Comment from Mastery
Hello, Sandra. I like the way this book is progressing. Your opening "hook" for chapter five is perfect.: "The silence was intense."
Good imagery throughout, too: Like:
" He sat drumming his finger on the table for a moment."
And in 1996: " I was garbed out in a lovely pale grey outfit, and Mildred was wearing a chocolate coloured suit that complimented her lovely auburn curls--and very fetching it was too!'"
Suggestion: " Leif looked up at the ceiling, his head tilted towards his shoulder." Perhaps just have it: "Leif looked up at the ceiling."
Excellent writing, Sandra. Bob
reply by the author on 17-Sep-2018
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Hello, Sandra. I like the way this book is progressing. Your opening "hook" for chapter five is perfect.: "The silence was intense."
Good imagery throughout, too: Like:
" He sat drumming his finger on the table for a moment."
And in 1996: " I was garbed out in a lovely pale grey outfit, and Mildred was wearing a chocolate coloured suit that complimented her lovely auburn curls--and very fetching it was too!'"
Suggestion: " Leif looked up at the ceiling, his head tilted towards his shoulder." Perhaps just have it: "Leif looked up at the ceiling."
Excellent writing, Sandra. Bob
Comment Written 16-Sep-2018
reply by the author on 17-Sep-2018
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Thank you, Bob, for your thoughtful review. I will have another look at that line. Thank you for pointing it out. :)) Sandra
Comment from wordsfromsue
Good chapter! Lots of tension building. So the toad interacts with Winston Churchill eventually.... maybe Churchill will have him shot!!
One correction:
because the look of (take out 'of') on her face was one of surprise tinged with confusion. 'Just stay quiet for a moment until you stop feeling shaky.' I told her.
reply by the author on 17-Sep-2018
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Good chapter! Lots of tension building. So the toad interacts with Winston Churchill eventually.... maybe Churchill will have him shot!!
One correction:
because the look of (take out 'of') on her face was one of surprise tinged with confusion. 'Just stay quiet for a moment until you stop feeling shaky.' I told her.
Comment Written 16-Sep-2018
reply by the author on 17-Sep-2018
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LOL, I love your reviews, Sue. Toad... now that is a good descriptive word to describe the charming Charles! LOL. might be using that. Thank you so much for the lovely 6 stars, my friend. So pleased you enjoyed it. Big hugs!! :)) Sandra xx
Comment from damommy
Oh! My interest was definitely piqued, and then, whammy, the story stopped. Hurry me back to see what happened. I can see that Pembrock is going to be beastly.
If Veronica gets Mildred all dolled up, she may lose her when men see how lovely she is. 8-)
- it was all our lots doing (does this need an apostrophe? Lots'? Making lots possessive of the action?)
reply by the author on 16-Sep-2018
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Oh! My interest was definitely piqued, and then, whammy, the story stopped. Hurry me back to see what happened. I can see that Pembrock is going to be beastly.
If Veronica gets Mildred all dolled up, she may lose her when men see how lovely she is. 8-)
- it was all our lots doing (does this need an apostrophe? Lots'? Making lots possessive of the action?)
Comment Written 16-Sep-2018
reply by the author on 16-Sep-2018
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Yes, you might just be right there, Yvonne!!! lol. I'll sort it now. Gladys is in a lot of trouble. :( xxx I had to come and edit this, I forgot to thank you!! :(( Thank you, my friend, big hugs! :)) Sandra xx lol.
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No need to thank me. This is going to be another great story.
Comment from aryr
A great chapter Sandra, it was a great touch to zero in on Mildred and her response to her first episode of time travel. You once again described the clothing and accessories to perfection. I also liked that you made both of them physically present to everyone, even though that will change after the 'powers to be' conversation. It was great that you mentioned Sir Winston Churchill. I do believe there will be hell to pay with Glady's arrest, that I will of course read more about in future chapters. Very well done, thanks for sharing. Smiles and hugs.
reply by the author on 16-Sep-2018
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A great chapter Sandra, it was a great touch to zero in on Mildred and her response to her first episode of time travel. You once again described the clothing and accessories to perfection. I also liked that you made both of them physically present to everyone, even though that will change after the 'powers to be' conversation. It was great that you mentioned Sir Winston Churchill. I do believe there will be hell to pay with Glady's arrest, that I will of course read more about in future chapters. Very well done, thanks for sharing. Smiles and hugs.
Comment Written 16-Sep-2018
reply by the author on 16-Sep-2018
Thank you so much, Alie; I can't see her arrest going unnoticed by her old man, somehow. I don't think I'd like to be Gladys in prison in those days, either! Big hugs, dear friend. :) Sandra xx
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You are so welcome Sandra, perhaps she won't make it to prison, but then since it has been printed she will, darn it.
Comment from Jannypan (Jan)
You did a good job with this chapter, Sandra. I enjoyed reading it and learned so much of the story from it. There's good flow, the pacing is good, and the interaction with the family is, too. I see no changes. Thanks for sharing. Jan
reply by the author on 16-Sep-2018
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You did a good job with this chapter, Sandra. I enjoyed reading it and learned so much of the story from it. There's good flow, the pacing is good, and the interaction with the family is, too. I see no changes. Thanks for sharing. Jan
Comment Written 16-Sep-2018
reply by the author on 16-Sep-2018
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Thank you so much, Jan, for reading and reviewing. I'm really pleased you liked this part. Thank you, my friend. :)) Sandra xx