Maladies of Magnitude
A (too) quiet, quaint little village...84 total reviews
Comment from rtobaygo
Good afternoon, Dean
You've hit the trifecta...poem, pictures and accompanying music all spot on. Interesting tale of how one's arrogance results in suffering and a spirit crushed.
Enjoyed!
Take care and stay safe,
Ray
reply by the author on 12-Oct-2016
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Good afternoon, Dean
You've hit the trifecta...poem, pictures and accompanying music all spot on. Interesting tale of how one's arrogance results in suffering and a spirit crushed.
Enjoyed!
Take care and stay safe,
Ray
Comment Written 11-Oct-2016
reply by the author on 12-Oct-2016
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Once again, thank you so much for taking the time away from your own work to read and review my own, Ray.
I deeply appreciate your complimentary comments and stellar review.
Thanks for the six, and more than anything else I am truly pleased that you enjoyed this.
Comment from nomi338
Wow! I am simply blown away. You may or may not be aware of how close this is to the true source of the sickness of racism that is rampant in the world today. The rich and powerful get away with all the money by convincing needy whites that if they oppose them, minorities will gain equality with them. So the needy whites hurt themselves in order to maintain their superiority over the minorities. Blindly thinking that it is better to be poor and white than to be better off and equal to minorities. You sir are a genius and a damn good writer to boot.
reply by the author on 12-Oct-2016
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Wow! I am simply blown away. You may or may not be aware of how close this is to the true source of the sickness of racism that is rampant in the world today. The rich and powerful get away with all the money by convincing needy whites that if they oppose them, minorities will gain equality with them. So the needy whites hurt themselves in order to maintain their superiority over the minorities. Blindly thinking that it is better to be poor and white than to be better off and equal to minorities. You sir are a genius and a damn good writer to boot.
Comment Written 11-Oct-2016
reply by the author on 12-Oct-2016
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Once again, thank you so much for taking the time away from your own work to read and review my own, Nomi, my friend.
I deeply appreciate your complimentary comments and stellar review.
Thanks for the six, and more than anything else I am truly pleased that you enjoyed this.
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Listen, I admit that I am overdue in paying you the respect that your great work deserves. I apologize and promise to do a better job of considering all work that is presented for review.
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No worries, Nomi, my friend.
On those rare occasions that you do decide to drop by, I always appreciate your insights and input.
Thanks so much again.
~Dean
Comment from N. P. S.
What an excellent piece! The words you used paints a magnificent picture in my head and I absolutely loved the structure of the poem. I loved how it rhymed the way it did. Great job.
reply by the author on 12-Oct-2016
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What an excellent piece! The words you used paints a magnificent picture in my head and I absolutely loved the structure of the poem. I loved how it rhymed the way it did. Great job.
Comment Written 11-Oct-2016
reply by the author on 12-Oct-2016
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Once again, thank you so much for taking the time away from your own work to read and review my own, N.P.S..
I deeply appreciate your complimentary comments and stellar review.
Thanks for the six, and more than anything else I am truly pleased that you enjoyed this.
Comment from Nathon caroo
Hi dean
Fantastic peice of creative writing the scene was clear to me before i read the synopsis, the music actually places you within the script of the poem, its alluring mesmorising bounding the reader in this dark place.
Not being morbib i was happy being there....question ? do the towns folk ignore him out of ignorance..or something else so far the most compelling piece of creative work i have read. Speechless my wife loves this stuff just a pity it was not written in italian.
best wishes
blessing to you
Nathon caroo
reply by the author on 12-Oct-2016
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Hi dean
Fantastic peice of creative writing the scene was clear to me before i read the synopsis, the music actually places you within the script of the poem, its alluring mesmorising bounding the reader in this dark place.
Not being morbib i was happy being there....question ? do the towns folk ignore him out of ignorance..or something else so far the most compelling piece of creative work i have read. Speechless my wife loves this stuff just a pity it was not written in italian.
best wishes
blessing to you
Nathon caroo
Comment Written 11-Oct-2016
reply by the author on 12-Oct-2016
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Once again, thank you so much for taking the time away from your own work to read and review my own, Nathon.
Because the weary traveler was an outsider, the townsfolk, who were too wrapped up in their own affairs, ignored him. He wasn't one of their own", so to speak.
I deeply appreciate your complimentary comments and stellar review.
Thanks for the six, and more than anything else I am truly pleased that you enjoyed this.
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Hi dean
Hey you are now my ghost mentor for my dark poems and short stories.
I have genuinley learned alot from your work/ diversity with subjects, in the 3 weeks ive been with fanstory...and i may just take you up on proof reading some of my work before its posted if that's ok .
regards& have a great weekend.
Nathon Caroo
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Absolutely, Nathon.
I'll be more than happy to assist you in any way I can, my friend.
Comment from Mary Wakeford
Hi Dean, another awesome poem with an excellent flow, and a word that I was grateful you provided a definition for in your notes-- aigremore. I must break out the Webster more often.
I enjoyed the story in your notes as well.
reply by the author on 11-Oct-2016
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Hi Dean, another awesome poem with an excellent flow, and a word that I was grateful you provided a definition for in your notes-- aigremore. I must break out the Webster more often.
I enjoyed the story in your notes as well.
Comment Written 10-Oct-2016
reply by the author on 11-Oct-2016
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Thanks for reading, Mary.
I do appreciate your comments.
~Dean
Comment from Rubylou
"I'd been blinded by my sin."
As I read through you poem twice, this line stung me. You have such a skill and talent to create an visual effect through the descriptive language used.
The reader is transported to the 'action' of the work, put in the midst of the characters.
Wonderful writing- and the author's notes and background were very useful.
Rubylou
reply by the author on 12-Oct-2016
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"I'd been blinded by my sin."
As I read through you poem twice, this line stung me. You have such a skill and talent to create an visual effect through the descriptive language used.
The reader is transported to the 'action' of the work, put in the midst of the characters.
Wonderful writing- and the author's notes and background were very useful.
Rubylou
Comment Written 10-Oct-2016
reply by the author on 12-Oct-2016
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Once again, thank you so much for taking the time away from your own work to read and review my own, Rubylou.
I deeply appreciate your complimentary comments and stellar review.
Thanks for the six, and more than anything else I am truly pleased that you enjoyed this.
Comment from pharp
Dean,
This is outstanding in every way. Your great talented is indeed shown in this masterpiece. This was a very chilling and creepy tale and you did an exceptional job in penning it. Thanks so much for your author's notes. I haven't heard the word dillydally since my childhood I smiled as it brought back memories when my grandmother would use it. Thanks for sharing my friend.
Blessings...............Portia
reply by the author on 13-Oct-2016
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Dean,
This is outstanding in every way. Your great talented is indeed shown in this masterpiece. This was a very chilling and creepy tale and you did an exceptional job in penning it. Thanks so much for your author's notes. I haven't heard the word dillydally since my childhood I smiled as it brought back memories when my grandmother would use it. Thanks for sharing my friend.
Blessings...............Portia
Comment Written 10-Oct-2016
reply by the author on 13-Oct-2016
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Thank so much for taking the time to read and review this, Portia.
Your kind comments and most generous six star rating are sincerely appreciated.
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My Pleasure!
Comment from ronnie k
Exceptional poem, deserving the highs rating but with the absence of six stars I must give this invitation to darkness a read and read, the last line gave me a hunger for more, more of this look in a window, where I could see but not be seen, thank you for sharing, Ronnie k
reply by the author on 10-Oct-2016
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Exceptional poem, deserving the highs rating but with the absence of six stars I must give this invitation to darkness a read and read, the last line gave me a hunger for more, more of this look in a window, where I could see but not be seen, thank you for sharing, Ronnie k
Comment Written 10-Oct-2016
reply by the author on 10-Oct-2016
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No sixes are ever necessary, Ronnie, although I am very grateful for each one I am fortunate to get. I fully realize we get so few to go around, and there are a great many very talented writers on FanStory.
I'm just grateful that you dropped by to give my work a chance, and that you enjoyed what you read during your visit.
Take care, and thanks very much again.
Comment from Jacqueline1616
Amazing and chilling at once, as always. I've missed reading your wondrously morbid maladies of musings. This is so well done. I love the pics too. Keep up the dark poetry. I love it.
Jackie
reply by the author on 13-Oct-2016
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Amazing and chilling at once, as always. I've missed reading your wondrously morbid maladies of musings. This is so well done. I love the pics too. Keep up the dark poetry. I love it.
Jackie
Comment Written 10-Oct-2016
reply by the author on 13-Oct-2016
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Thank so much for taking the time to read and review this, Jackie.
Your kind comments and most generous six star rating are sincerely appreciated.
Comment from Father Flaps
How can I not offer six stars? There's no way to improve this eerie tale. I love the rhyme scheme!
aaab
cccbb
And the repetition,
"wafted deftly, drifting over--over verdant hills so green."
"Wonderment, my soul did rally--rallied 'round my fears of dread."
"Had my sanity now failed me--failed me as it had before?"
"Now I must but die and rest here--rest here in sad solitude."
Only the fourth verse lacked that inner rhyme, always in the second line.
The author notes helped understand the story better. I'm just wondering... was there a leper colony in the Mourne Mountains of Northern Ireland?
Loved those footsteps trudging along the gravel path. Lots of good alliteration, I especially liked
"dare I go, or dillydally?"
My favorite line,
"Trap'd here now, disease enwalls me; like the pauper whom I'd shooed."
Nicely penned, Deano! (as usual)
cheers
Kimbob
reply by the author on 13-Oct-2016
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How can I not offer six stars? There's no way to improve this eerie tale. I love the rhyme scheme!
aaab
cccbb
And the repetition,
"wafted deftly, drifting over--over verdant hills so green."
"Wonderment, my soul did rally--rallied 'round my fears of dread."
"Had my sanity now failed me--failed me as it had before?"
"Now I must but die and rest here--rest here in sad solitude."
Only the fourth verse lacked that inner rhyme, always in the second line.
The author notes helped understand the story better. I'm just wondering... was there a leper colony in the Mourne Mountains of Northern Ireland?
Loved those footsteps trudging along the gravel path. Lots of good alliteration, I especially liked
"dare I go, or dillydally?"
My favorite line,
"Trap'd here now, disease enwalls me; like the pauper whom I'd shooed."
Nicely penned, Deano! (as usual)
cheers
Kimbob
Comment Written 10-Oct-2016
reply by the author on 13-Oct-2016
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Kimbob, you're too kind, my friend.
Thank you so much for taking the time to read and review this.
Your kind comments and most generous six star rating are sincerely appreciated.