A Need For a Crutch
sixty word story19 total reviews
Comment from Bill Schott
This is a straight to the point story that simply cuts a slice of life out and let's us assume what we will about almost everything concerning the three characters. Nice.
  |
This is a straight to the point story that simply cuts a slice of life out and let's us assume what we will about almost everything concerning the three characters. Nice.
Comment Written 17-Nov-2015
Comment from humpwhistle
Once again, you sign your work with your presentation.
Mikey, do you think that's fair?
The last two lines--I have no idea who is speaking.
Peace, Lee
reply by the author on 17-Nov-2015
|
Once again, you sign your work with your presentation.
Mikey, do you think that's fair?
The last two lines--I have no idea who is speaking.
Peace, Lee
Comment Written 17-Nov-2015
reply by the author on 17-Nov-2015
-
You mean the box? Does it stand out the much? Just a habit. I can remove it, I don't like the look of the display especially in the new format.
The last two lines are staff at the shelter. Not clear? I'll take a look. I get too busy with these, I know. Thanks for taking a look, mikey
-
Hey. Thanks for the nudge. It's much better now.
Comment from c_lucas
The homeless and the needy needs compassionate people to look after theme. This is well written with a smooth flow of words. Good luck in your contest.
|
The homeless and the needy needs compassionate people to look after theme. This is well written with a smooth flow of words. Good luck in your contest.
Comment Written 17-Nov-2015
Comment from nordicgirl
I followed this easily. I guess I am on thecsame wavelength. I like how you offer the possibility of an angel without hammering it into the story. Very subtle and effective for those of us who got it. I will be voting for this. Exceptional.
 |
I followed this easily. I guess I am on thecsame wavelength. I like how you offer the possibility of an angel without hammering it into the story. Very subtle and effective for those of us who got it. I will be voting for this. Exceptional.
Comment Written 17-Nov-2015
Comment from Cajungirl
Very unique sixty word dash contest entry. I enjoyed the story and did not find any errors. The artwork you chose enhanced the read. Excellent story. Good luck in the contest.
|
Very unique sixty word dash contest entry. I enjoyed the story and did not find any errors. The artwork you chose enhanced the read. Excellent story. Good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 17-Nov-2015
Comment from Michael Ludwinder
I thought this was creative. I thought the "one leg" line felt a little artificial. Not sure it was relevant to the story being told. Outside of that I thought you did an excellent job of telling a story with a very limited number of words. Well done.
|
I thought this was creative. I thought the "one leg" line felt a little artificial. Not sure it was relevant to the story being told. Outside of that I thought you did an excellent job of telling a story with a very limited number of words. Well done.
Comment Written 17-Nov-2015
Comment from Brett Matthew West
Well written story that depicts some times somebody is indeed watching out for the downtrodden when no one will.
Uses terms such as the last two lines to much better illustrate this theme.
Should be a good contest entry.
|
Well written story that depicts some times somebody is indeed watching out for the downtrodden when no one will.
Uses terms such as the last two lines to much better illustrate this theme.
Should be a good contest entry.
Comment Written 17-Nov-2015
Comment from Domino 2
Maybe I'm being dim, but I didn't get the ending.
What's the connection between having only one leg and talking to oneself.
The dialogue and build-up was good and clear.
Good luck and best wishes, Ray
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
|
Maybe I'm being dim, but I didn't get the ending.
What's the connection between having only one leg and talking to oneself.
The dialogue and build-up was good and clear.
Good luck and best wishes, Ray
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 17-Nov-2015
Comment from Zue65
This is such a brief story but the author was able to pack in a loaded message in 60 words. I cannot really do what you did. I am not creative enough as the prose writers who can imagine events and cook up plots out of nothing. Thanks for sharing.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
|
This is such a brief story but the author was able to pack in a loaded message in 60 words. I cannot really do what you did. I am not creative enough as the prose writers who can imagine events and cook up plots out of nothing. Thanks for sharing.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 17-Nov-2015