Comment from donkeyoatey

Excellent

The saga continues! So glad you are still developing your characters so well! It is a bit scary, a bit mystical, and a great mystery! Thank you for picking my art, I am honored! Donkeyoatey

 Comment Written 30-May-2013

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reply by the author on 31-May-2013

I love your work, d. I think the picture this time really fits with the situation. So glad your work is available to use. And thanks for the gracious review. Warm regards, Bev

Comment from Curt Winslow

Excellent

I like what I have read so far, and loved it. I love thriller and suspense type novels. I bookcased this so this weeken I could spend some time reading it. Ill review them as I go. Great job and keep writing!

 Comment Written 30-May-2013

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reply by the author on 31-May-2013

Thank you, Curt. I sure appreciate your generous review and encouregement. Warmest regards, Bev

Comment from Selina Stambi

Excellent

Whodunnit ... whodunnit??

Oh, the plot thickens so deliciously.

You are really a master at this kind of tale-weaving, Bev, dear, and I'm enjoying it. :)

 Comment Written 30-May-2013

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reply by the author on 31-May-2013

Thank you so much, Sonali. I am honored and encouraged by your generous review. Thanks so much, my friend. Hugs, Bev

Comment from alexgeorge

Excellent

I like the strong POV you carry across for Jana, and the way you mingle her thoughts with the dialogue. These image builders worked particularly well for me: 'her mind through up roadblocks of logic', 'she resented facing its impenetrable surface'. Sounds like a solid story, that i would like to follow, even at this late stage.

 Comment Written 30-May-2013

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reply by the author on 30-May-2013

Thanks so much for this generous and encouraging review. It's always helpful to receive feedback on what seems to be working. Much appreciated! Bev

Comment from Joan E.

Excellent

Thank you for adding the intriguing artwork and giving us the meanings of the Sioux words. I am glad Jana also found her uncle's words to be enigmatic! I liked that she and her partner had a quick, mutual understanding. Your "wall" metaphor is quite effective, and Rick's personal response to racial stereotyping is compelling. I admired the way you are adding even more drama to the story by bringing a FBI competitor! Cheers- Joan

 Comment Written 29-May-2013

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reply by the author on 30-May-2013

Joan, thank you so much for your insights and generosity. I sure appreciate your encouragement for the direction I'm heading. Warmest regards, Bev

Comment from sweetwoodjax

Excellent

this is very well written, mystery writer, you did an excellent job writing this chapter where jana and rick discuss what was said by her uncle, decide to keep from speaking it aloud but keeping it in the report. jana recognizes one of the feds as the top profiler in the fbi

 Comment Written 29-May-2013

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reply by the author on 29-May-2013

Thanks much for the generous review, sweet. :0) Bev

Comment from Mark Alan Trimeloni

Excellent

The writing is solid with an interesting story line. In this part, "Further, he intimated it was the 'real' killer using..." I like the word, "intimated" I had to look it up. So much more interesting than the word, "hinted". Smooth flow and well edited. Made for a nice read.

 Comment Written 29-May-2013

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reply by the author on 29-May-2013

Hi, Mark. Thanks so much for this great review. It's always so helpful to find out what readers like in a story. Much appreciate it! Warm regards, Bev

Comment from donaldww

Excellent

The interview is over, and as they two detectives drive back, you build excellent tension around their characters and situation. I liked the way the cracker-jack cop's appearance gave Rick a feeling of heat.

These two must feel like this investigation is taking forever, and they don't have a definitive lead yet.

Excellent post!

Cheers,
DW

 Comment Written 29-May-2013

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reply by the author on 29-May-2013

Thanks much for the great review, Donald. Real life detectives cover so much ground and 'waste' hours and hours of time following up useless leads. I like to think my story is a bit more representative of real police work. Take care, Bev

Comment from barbara.wilkey

Excellent

I hope the Feds don't give Rick too much of a hassle. I enjoyed reading this post.


Her Uncle Tony was, she sensed, asking her to read between the lines. (because of her uncle has a lower case, 'u', I am wondering if you couldn't just start the sentence with Uncle Tony, but you know the story better. I am not sure it would work)

 Comment Written 29-May-2013

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reply by the author on 29-May-2013

Thank you so much, Barbara. I really appreciate the support! And I think your suggestion is great. Warm regards, Bev

Comment from DRG24

Excellent

Wonderful Picture!!!!!!!!!
Thanks for including a background as it is helpful for the readers understanding. Great characterization!!!!!!!!

 Comment Written 29-May-2013

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reply by the author on 29-May-2013

I love donkeyoatey's artwork. I've used it for many of the chapters.

Thanks for the wonderful review!

Bev