Comment from Carol Clark2

Excellent

Wow, lots of drama and tension in this chapter. I'm sorry Eleanor lost Margaret, but I'm glad Eleanor was with her at the end. The courtroom scene is so well written, as is the conference with the lawyers. So William is back -- it'll be interesting to see how he's involved again. Blessings. Carol

 Comment Written 02-Nov-2024

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reply by the author on 02-Nov-2024

I have no idea why this site hates me...I just wrote and answered you and guess what... I get to say hi again. LOL Margaret's probably mad at me for letting her die, but Eleanor's got work to do and I am sure they will be together someday.
Smiles, Carol

Comment from BethShelby

Excellent

So, this is a continuing story connected to painting and the pageant. He is surprised that he wasn't pardoned but I imagine he will soon be free to do whatever he plans to. Eleanor seems rather frail. I don't know how she could die again but it seems like she might. I enjoyed it.

 Comment Written 02-Nov-2024

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reply by the author on 02-Nov-2024

I don't think Eleanor will die again, but her favorite people are going to come under fire and it's going to be very emotional. Eleanor's a fighter and won't stop until she takes Doyle down.... unless???? We shall see!
Smiles, Carol

Comment from Jacob1395

Excellent

You definitely know how to write an intense scene, Carol, and I could really feel that in the opening with Margaret, I really did think they might leave her there for a moment and I was glad when Eleanor intervened. Another excellent chapter, I'm looking forward to the next one.

 Comment Written 02-Nov-2024

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reply by the author on 02-Nov-2024

Thanks so much, Jacob. This story is going to have a lot of tense moments and involve my main characters in some gut-wrenching situations. I hope I can pull it off. thanks for the kindness and interest in how it is developing. Stay tuned!
miles, Carol

Comment from barbara.wilkey

Excellent

This is coming together nicely. I can't wait to read more.

Eleanor's voice was soothing. "We can do this, " (soothing,)

Rossi leaned in, his voice low. "That's what everyone thought. (low,)

 Comment Written 02-Nov-2024

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reply by the author on 02-Nov-2024

Hello, Barbara! I am thrilled that you are enjoying this new story...Your buddy will be making an entrance soon and play an important part in the story. Thanks for the review and support.
Smiles, Carol

Comment from Michael Ludwinder

Excellent

Well done! So well written! This has such tension! I love how you build Doyle's fury so subtly. You manged to keep his rage contained while showing just enough to let us feel the storm! His careful calculation make him an unforgettable character. The interaction with Rossi is fantastic. Can't wait to see where Doyle's plans lead!

 Comment Written 02-Nov-2024

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reply by the author on 02-Nov-2024

Doyle's a sly one with tons of power and connections with all the wrong people. He's got his sites set on destroying my "friends" and if I'm not careful he might accomplish it. He's already rattled Eleanor with the loss of her sister and has things going on behind the scenes to upset the apple cart for the others. it should be a very tense, emotional ride.
Smiles, Carol

Comment from Julie Helms

Excellent

This chapter is non-stop suspense! From Margaret's dramatic rescue and death to the parole scene. You masterfully built the tension up until "denied"!

One suggestion:

smelling the burning rubber and the crunch of metal.
(This sentence structure implies he smelled the crunching metal. ...and the sound of crunching metal.)

Great chapter!
Julie

 Comment Written 02-Nov-2024

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reply by the author on 02-Nov-2024

And that's just the beginning! LOL I think this one might be a edge of the seat read from start to finish if all goes the way I suspect. I am thrilled you are enjoying it. Thanks so much.
Smiles, Carol

Comment from Sandra Stoner-Mitchell

Excellent

Obviouly Rossi has ways to get him out. That will be fatal for those on the board who refused his release. And Garth and Donatelli will need to watch their backs. It was sad that Margaret died, Eleanor will be after Doyle now. She is one target he can't get rid of! You've got off to an excellent start, my friend. Well done! :)) Sandra xx

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 Comment Written 02-Nov-2024

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reply by the author on 02-Nov-2024

Yes, I wasn't sure how that was going to go down, but with the fire and everything, it just didn't seem feasible that she would live. Who knows... maybe somewhere down the line she will be with Eleanor again.
Smiles, hugs and love, Carol

Comment from Wendy G

Excellent

I'd hoped for a moment that Margaret might survive, but at least she knew Eleanor was with her. You built up the tension very well re Doyle's parole. He's an evil and cunning man, dangerous within the prison as well as outside. A vet tv dramatic chapter. Sorry, no sixes left.
Wendy

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The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.

 Comment Written 02-Nov-2024

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reply by the author on 02-Nov-2024

I hoped to save her too, but with all the tension, the fire, etc, it didn't work out, but who knows maybe in the end she will be with Eleanor again. The story is going to have a lot more tension and bad things are going to happen to good people... Very emotional story.
Smiles and hugs, Carol