Four Years Old
The End of Innocence124 total reviews
Comment from JeffreyStone
I had to read this poem. Before reading, I wondered if I was opening something with hardcore sex for the sake of sensationalism. I was really mistaken. This is a poignant and piercing poem. It is not beautiful, but it is stark and outstanding. Good poetry should make the reader think or touch his sensibilities. This one does both. I am glad I saved this six for a truly deserving piece of literature. JeffreyStone
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2010
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I had to read this poem. Before reading, I wondered if I was opening something with hardcore sex for the sake of sensationalism. I was really mistaken. This is a poignant and piercing poem. It is not beautiful, but it is stark and outstanding. Good poetry should make the reader think or touch his sensibilities. This one does both. I am glad I saved this six for a truly deserving piece of literature. JeffreyStone
Comment Written 27-Feb-2010
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2010
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I am honored Jeff, more by your thoughts than the generous stars. The need for me to express is equaled only by my desire to leave the reader with the sense of knowing what I am trying to say.
Your comments are very well received my friend,
Curt
Comment from Patrick G Cox
Hi Curt,
I have to confess that, having read this,I was i two minds over leaving a comment. I hope the poem isn't biographic and even if it isn't, I hope that whoever the victim is/was has found someone that genuinely understands and can help heal the wounds an act of this nature inevitably leaves.
After 36 years in the fire and emergency services I have constantly thought that there was nothing left that human depravity could produce - and then someone found or did something else.
Patrick
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2010
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Hi Curt,
I have to confess that, having read this,I was i two minds over leaving a comment. I hope the poem isn't biographic and even if it isn't, I hope that whoever the victim is/was has found someone that genuinely understands and can help heal the wounds an act of this nature inevitably leaves.
After 36 years in the fire and emergency services I have constantly thought that there was nothing left that human depravity could produce - and then someone found or did something else.
Patrick
Comment Written 27-Feb-2010
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2010
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Patrick,
I can definitely sympathize, my friend. I once had a group of offenders in counseling, one of whom had sodomized and fellated hie eighteen month old son. Do you want to know what his sentence was in court? Three years probation, and counseling in my group.
Tell me there is justice in this world.
Blessings to you my friend,
Curt
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I long ago came to the conclusion that Justice is a myth and it is certainly not found in any court I know of. Our courts tend to be an expensive game played by the legal profession at our expense and to rules no one else can comprehend.
As a Barrister fried once told me, if you are looking for "justice" don't look in any court.
Patrick
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I like that. I also like what Mark Twain once said,
"If you want to see the true dregs of society, go to any prison at shift change."
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Sadly he's probably right. The original police, the Bow Street Runners were recruited from the ranks of thieves, robbers and forgers - reasoning set a thief to catch one.
Patrick
Comment from Deejharrington
A very powerful poem. You have captured the horrors of abuse and the accusation of lying by the parent. Unimaginable pain and sorrow. No child should be left to deal with something like this. What does it say for our society where this is not unusual?
deb
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2010
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A very powerful poem. You have captured the horrors of abuse and the accusation of lying by the parent. Unimaginable pain and sorrow. No child should be left to deal with something like this. What does it say for our society where this is not unusual?
deb
Comment Written 27-Feb-2010
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2010
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Deb,
I can't begin to tell you what I think of society without using every explicative I know.
Humankind, ha, "human", "kind," is a bit of an oxymoron sometimes.
I truly appreciate your thoughts Deb, thank you.
Curt
Comment from Margaret Snowdon
My God - I hope the b####
was caught out and severely
punished - the sicko.
It wrenches at my mother's
heart to think of such abuse
to little innocence... what
terror.
Margaret.
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2010
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My God - I hope the b####
was caught out and severely
punished - the sicko.
It wrenches at my mother's
heart to think of such abuse
to little innocence... what
terror.
Margaret.
Comment Written 27-Feb-2010
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2010
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No, Margaret, he lived in Connecticut after a career in the Army, and died of natural causes some years back. He had a wife and a family, and God only knows how many other children's lives he "touched."
Thank you my dear friend,
Curt
Comment from Sally Carter
Oh Curt, so sorry I have no 6s left, though I am sure you are more interested in people understanding this than giving you stars.
I expressed worries about your Chester poem, but have not a one about this. Shocking, graphic, gets right to the child's agony, and I cannot believe there are many who would misunderstand or find this arousing. It is horrific, dirty, and very, very effective. I am imagining this is the kind of thing that could be so powerful in working with victims, or is your work just with perpetrators?
I haven't even commented on the quality of the writing, but as ever, the rhyme and meter are superb too.
A real tour de force. I applaud you.
Sally
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2010
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Oh Curt, so sorry I have no 6s left, though I am sure you are more interested in people understanding this than giving you stars.
I expressed worries about your Chester poem, but have not a one about this. Shocking, graphic, gets right to the child's agony, and I cannot believe there are many who would misunderstand or find this arousing. It is horrific, dirty, and very, very effective. I am imagining this is the kind of thing that could be so powerful in working with victims, or is your work just with perpetrators?
I haven't even commented on the quality of the writing, but as ever, the rhyme and meter are superb too.
A real tour de force. I applaud you.
Sally
Comment Written 27-Feb-2010
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2010
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Sally,
Thank you for understanding. Counseling with predators helped me dive into the belly of the beast so I could retrieve my soul.
This work is a step in cleaning it.
I never counseled victims, but I can spot another abused soul from a mile away, blindfolded.
Thank you once again Sally,
Curt
Comment from Lady & Louis
Gods, Curt, not you, too? Bloody hell. I begin to wonder if children who weren't abused (I'm one) aren't in the minority. What can I say that won't seem wholly inadequate? I can only say "bravo" for being able to write about these devastating events, and in such a clear, harsh poetic voice. (I was going to say "unblinking" but that's a mixed metaphor too far.)
With love,
Louise
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2010
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Gods, Curt, not you, too? Bloody hell. I begin to wonder if children who weren't abused (I'm one) aren't in the minority. What can I say that won't seem wholly inadequate? I can only say "bravo" for being able to write about these devastating events, and in such a clear, harsh poetic voice. (I was going to say "unblinking" but that's a mixed metaphor too far.)
With love,
Louise
Comment Written 27-Feb-2010
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2010
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Louise,
Your thoughts are especially endearing to me, if I even need to say that.
I know that victims can often spot each other out of any group, as I have done almost all of my life.
I pray that abused children are the minority, and that the very phrase of those words become extinct.
Blessings to you, Louise,
Curt
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Even a minority of one would be too many. I cannot begin to imagine what it is like. It's bad enough to think that even Louis's fairly horrible childhood - yes, he went through what we would call abuse - is better than what too many kids endure today.
Blessings to you, my friend.
Louise
Comment from patmedium
No wonder you fight for the underdog.
What else can I say? I cannot give TRUE sympathy and understanding, friend, because I have never experienced.
I can, however, give love. Pat.
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2010
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No wonder you fight for the underdog.
What else can I say? I cannot give TRUE sympathy and understanding, friend, because I have never experienced.
I can, however, give love. Pat.
Comment Written 27-Feb-2010
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2010
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I am grateful for both your comments and the fact that you never had to deal with anything remotely like this Pat.
I am truly touched by your thoughts, thank you.
Curt
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My love to you, friend. Pat.
Comment from suneagle
Very confronting poem, Curt. Well-written, but a few minor adjustments noted that you may like to consider:
'cause Mom will be home in awhile.
(... in a while [Usually two words after a preposition.])
How can a four year old escape
(four-year-old [Two hyphens when the measurement unit is singular.)
My [mother] said I always lied
(No capital for the relationship when it follows a pronoun.)
and said so ['til] the day she died
(Or you could write: and said so [till] the day she died)
but [four-year-olds] don't lie with blood
but [four-year-olds] don't wish to die
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2010
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Very confronting poem, Curt. Well-written, but a few minor adjustments noted that you may like to consider:
'cause Mom will be home in awhile.
(... in a while [Usually two words after a preposition.])
How can a four year old escape
(four-year-old [Two hyphens when the measurement unit is singular.)
My [mother] said I always lied
(No capital for the relationship when it follows a pronoun.)
and said so ['til] the day she died
(Or you could write: and said so [till] the day she died)
but [four-year-olds] don't lie with blood
but [four-year-olds] don't wish to die
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 27-Feb-2010
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2010
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I truly want to thank you for the amount of time you put into this review. I have read your works and find you quite thorough in your research on punctuation in literature.
However, in poetry, there is much more leniency to the punctuations that you speak of.
I do appreciate the thought,
Curt
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I don't recall correcting any punctuation, Curt. I think they were all spelling issues.
Comment from Mrs Jones
The meter and the rhyme is spot on. This is an excellent write, but I found it so disturbing I almost wished I had not read it. It made so angry, I am shaking.
Good writing
Cheers
Rose
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2010
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The meter and the rhyme is spot on. This is an excellent write, but I found it so disturbing I almost wished I had not read it. It made so angry, I am shaking.
Good writing
Cheers
Rose
Comment Written 27-Feb-2010
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2010
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Rose,
I shook some myself writing this.
I truly appreciate your thoughts Rose,
Curt
Comment from Maria C.
My chest is tight. It is so awful. I know this goes on so much more than we realize. I am so sorry you had to deal with such a devastating crime. Thank you for sharing. I hope all are listening.
Maria C.
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2010
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My chest is tight. It is so awful. I know this goes on so much more than we realize. I am so sorry you had to deal with such a devastating crime. Thank you for sharing. I hope all are listening.
Maria C.
Comment Written 27-Feb-2010
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2010
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Maria,
I want to sincerely thank you for your caring thoughts. They are very much appreciated.
Curt
