Sorry for the mess...
I'm so tired, Lord...37 total reviews
Comment from Kingsrookviii
Dean, this is fantastic. Talk about making me think and really reach! The implication of the crossed out text implies that these word would be one "We" would like to say, but cannot in face of our collective deeds. Mess, it is. Mess it was and will be, to. It speaks to the colossal arrogance of Man and out inability to pull ourselves together.
This is the heart and soul of your favorite genre, my incredibly talent friend. It is the ancient battle of dark and light, mortal struggle with immortality and the beyond.
The teeter-totter from with-n, as with-out. Deep, deep stuff. I'm changing this to a six. Bruce.
reply by the author on 09-Dec-2014
Dean, this is fantastic. Talk about making me think and really reach! The implication of the crossed out text implies that these word would be one "We" would like to say, but cannot in face of our collective deeds. Mess, it is. Mess it was and will be, to. It speaks to the colossal arrogance of Man and out inability to pull ourselves together.
This is the heart and soul of your favorite genre, my incredibly talent friend. It is the ancient battle of dark and light, mortal struggle with immortality and the beyond.
The teeter-totter from with-n, as with-out. Deep, deep stuff. I'm changing this to a six. Bruce.
Comment Written 09-Dec-2014
reply by the author on 09-Dec-2014
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You're very kind, Bruce, and you nailed it...my reasons for writing it the way in which I did. You're very perceptive, my friend, but then I can tell that from your own writing.
Thanks for reading, for taking the time to critique this one for me, and for the six stars as well. I sincerely appreciate everything. :}
~Dean
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You are more than welcome, Dean.
Comment from Delahay
I really like the twist you supplied at the end. I was wondering while reading who was the writer if this letter to God. Mankind does seem to be trying to self destruct and we have certainly made a mess of things.
reply by the author on 09-Dec-2014
I really like the twist you supplied at the end. I was wondering while reading who was the writer if this letter to God. Mankind does seem to be trying to self destruct and we have certainly made a mess of things.
Comment Written 09-Dec-2014
reply by the author on 09-Dec-2014
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We sure do...at least, I think so, Ward.
Thanks very much for the R&R...
~Dean
Comment from royowen
I must have missed this one or it was anonymous, congratulations for winning the comp. Well done, this would tend to follow the book of Ecclesiastes vanity of vanities, but the book is many more times optimistic in its assumptions, but I can see the parallels with the thinking, well written, articulate expression and imaginative thinking, well done, Dean, blessings, Roy.
reply by the author on 09-Dec-2014
I must have missed this one or it was anonymous, congratulations for winning the comp. Well done, this would tend to follow the book of Ecclesiastes vanity of vanities, but the book is many more times optimistic in its assumptions, but I can see the parallels with the thinking, well written, articulate expression and imaginative thinking, well done, Dean, blessings, Roy.
Comment Written 08-Dec-2014
reply by the author on 09-Dec-2014
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Nothing unusual, Roy. hardly anyone looks at the contest entries these days until they're over. Me? I read everything in every contest everyday, before I read anything else. But, that's just me...
Thanks...
~Dean
Comment from rjuselius
this is a compelling read dear dean! it has an interesting and unique point of view! if mankind really does want to shut down, god will come across and send his son. again.
thank you for sharing!
good luck in the contest!
rebekka x
reply by the author on 10-Dec-2014
this is a compelling read dear dean! it has an interesting and unique point of view! if mankind really does want to shut down, god will come across and send his son. again.
thank you for sharing!
good luck in the contest!
rebekka x
Comment Written 08-Dec-2014
reply by the author on 10-Dec-2014
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Thank you very much, Rebekka, my friend. I appreciate you taking the time to critique my work, and I'm very grateful for your wonderful comments. :}
~Dean
Comment from mikemagine
Brutally honest and from the heart, Dean. I think there are plenty of times when many, if not most, humans would write something like this - if they wrote it from this perspective...Your choice of words is just right, I'd say.
Cheers!
Mike
reply by the author on 08-Dec-2014
Brutally honest and from the heart, Dean. I think there are plenty of times when many, if not most, humans would write something like this - if they wrote it from this perspective...Your choice of words is just right, I'd say.
Cheers!
Mike
Comment Written 08-Dec-2014
reply by the author on 08-Dec-2014
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Thanks so much, Mike, and I'm very glad you took the time to read and review it for me.
Much appreciated, my friend. :) ~Dean
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Sure thing, Dean:-)
Comment from Dr. Nad
This is probably exactly what mankind would say to God. . . B U T with all due respect when I have some time in the next couple I might present a "Response to mankind". Dean, I respectfully request your permission to stick my toe in the waters of the essay, leaving the rhyming jonerah (sp) for a moment. Great Job in this rendition. May God Bless You.
reply by the author on 08-Dec-2014
This is probably exactly what mankind would say to God. . . B U T with all due respect when I have some time in the next couple I might present a "Response to mankind". Dean, I respectfully request your permission to stick my toe in the waters of the essay, leaving the rhyming jonerah (sp) for a moment. Great Job in this rendition. May God Bless You.
Comment Written 08-Dec-2014
reply by the author on 08-Dec-2014
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By all means, Doc, be my guest. I have no problem with that whatsoever, my friend. Thanks for the review, I really appreciate it. ~Dean
Comment from amahra
First, congratulations on your win. I read it twice to see if I really got it. It seems that the person wrote a suicide note to God just before ending his life. I think I got that right.
First, congratulations on your win. I read it twice to see if I really got it. It seems that the person wrote a suicide note to God just before ending his life. I think I got that right.
Comment Written 07-Dec-2014
Comment from lancellot
Very interesting, Dean, and congrats on the win. I like the question. I would ask Him if this was all just a test, and if he is conducting in other places too. well done.
reply by the author on 07-Dec-2014
Very interesting, Dean, and congrats on the win. I like the question. I would ask Him if this was all just a test, and if he is conducting in other places too. well done.
Comment Written 07-Dec-2014
reply by the author on 07-Dec-2014
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Thanks, Lance. I'm very glad you enjoyed reading this.
~Dean
Comment from niftyscwerl
This is a very power piece of writing and I really like the message. The flow of things is well handled and would definitely share this with other people. I work in a prison and this would be a great 'poster' message for the wall to maybe get some of them realizing the damage they do to themselves and their lives, all those who care for them, etc. Not just in there but overall. You write very well and thank you for sharing!
This is a very power piece of writing and I really like the message. The flow of things is well handled and would definitely share this with other people. I work in a prison and this would be a great 'poster' message for the wall to maybe get some of them realizing the damage they do to themselves and their lives, all those who care for them, etc. Not just in there but overall. You write very well and thank you for sharing!
Comment Written 07-Dec-2014
Comment from padumachitta
Hey Dean...congrats on the win, you probalby don't need another six...but you are getting it anyway:-)
I tend not to read a lot of God stuff. But I trust you. So I read it and am pleased I did.
It captures the feel and mess we have made. Thanks.
padumachitta
Hey Dean...congrats on the win, you probalby don't need another six...but you are getting it anyway:-)
I tend not to read a lot of God stuff. But I trust you. So I read it and am pleased I did.
It captures the feel and mess we have made. Thanks.
padumachitta
Comment Written 07-Dec-2014