The Whisper of Time
A fleeting reflection on time9 total reviews
Comment from estory
Ah, this is what these haiku like forms are supposed to sound like. You had great balance here, a wonderful colorful nature image, and an epiphany moment, so all the elements were in there. There's also an interesting, exotic asian feel to it. I thought this image of the leaves trembling, drifting away on the breeze, linked with the hands trying to hold onto them, created a great sense of the ephemeral nature of experience. estory
Ah, this is what these haiku like forms are supposed to sound like. You had great balance here, a wonderful colorful nature image, and an epiphany moment, so all the elements were in there. There's also an interesting, exotic asian feel to it. I thought this image of the leaves trembling, drifting away on the breeze, linked with the hands trying to hold onto them, created a great sense of the ephemeral nature of experience. estory
Comment Written 13-Jan-2025
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
As time is running out for many of us, we contemplate our life and what we think is most important. I try not to let any time slip through my hands before enjoying every minute. A poignant post, love Dolly x x x
As time is running out for many of us, we contemplate our life and what we think is most important. I try not to let any time slip through my hands before enjoying every minute. A poignant post, love Dolly x x x
Comment Written 13-Jan-2025
Comment from Dawn Munro
Beautifully poetic -- a well done lune. Best of luck in the contest, and welcome to the site. I think you could have presented this more elegantly with some chosen artwork, but the words must speak for themselves regardless.
Beautifully poetic -- a well done lune. Best of luck in the contest, and welcome to the site. I think you could have presented this more elegantly with some chosen artwork, but the words must speak for themselves regardless.
Comment Written 12-Jan-2025
Comment from jake cosmos aller
this haiku captures in a few short words the essense of the experience of time as a moment that passes us by as it progresses towards the future and leaving behind the past as a flirting memory
this haiku captures in a few short words the essense of the experience of time as a moment that passes us by as it progresses towards the future and leaving behind the past as a flirting memory
Comment Written 11-Jan-2025
Comment from Rene Tyo
Dang, if this isn't a powerful set of words selected to convey aging. What a great poem. The use of nature to convey your thought is very compelling. This is a great example of where more is less. I wouldn't change a word, this is really well written in my opinion.
Dang, if this isn't a powerful set of words selected to convey aging. What a great poem. The use of nature to convey your thought is very compelling. This is a great example of where more is less. I wouldn't change a word, this is really well written in my opinion.
Comment Written 11-Jan-2025
Comment from royowen
Of course time rules the lives of men, we don't have much of it to waste, but waste it we do, and I like the way you align it with hold, it is precious, and we tend to waste it. Beautifully written, good luck, blessings Roy
Of course time rules the lives of men, we don't have much of it to waste, but waste it we do, and I like the way you align it with hold, it is precious, and we tend to waste it. Beautifully written, good luck, blessings Roy
Comment Written 11-Jan-2025
Comment from Alexandra Trovato
This is a good Lune poem, with skillfully crafted words and emotion. My only suggestion is to add an image, if the image would strengthen your message. If not, it's best not to add. I enjoyed reading this. Best wishes, Alex
This is a good Lune poem, with skillfully crafted words and emotion. My only suggestion is to add an image, if the image would strengthen your message. If not, it's best not to add. I enjoyed reading this. Best wishes, Alex
Comment Written 11-Jan-2025
Comment from Bryce 1
You shot me down with this one. I remember as a child watching autumn run its course. Those brown leaves, thousands of em, and now, time seems to have really run me through, I am no longer that kid
You shot me down with this one. I remember as a child watching autumn run its course. Those brown leaves, thousands of em, and now, time seems to have really run me through, I am no longer that kid
Comment Written 01-Jan-2025
Comment from Janet Foor
Excellent "Lune" poem for the Lune poetry contest. I love the personification of the leaves trembling, winds whispering and time sliping.
Very nicely done.
Blessings and Happy New Year
Janet
Excellent "Lune" poem for the Lune poetry contest. I love the personification of the leaves trembling, winds whispering and time sliping.
Very nicely done.
Blessings and Happy New Year
Janet
Comment Written 01-Jan-2025