A Picture's Worth a Thousand Poems
Viewing comments for Chapter 30 "Ghost Ship"A compilation of pictapoems from my portfolio
74 total reviews
Comment from Alan K Pease
With my ventures abroad I will always treasure the sounds of the sea. You treat them well with the added creaking of the vessel noted in my sailing ventures, but was not quite replaced by the muffled sounds of a motor yacht on the morning watch - the main part of my experience. Excellent poem for you write so very well with spiritual qualities about challenges
With my ventures abroad I will always treasure the sounds of the sea. You treat them well with the added creaking of the vessel noted in my sailing ventures, but was not quite replaced by the muffled sounds of a motor yacht on the morning watch - the main part of my experience. Excellent poem for you write so very well with spiritual qualities about challenges
Comment Written 30-Jul-2014
Comment from Lovinia
Hi Dean
Superb presentation as usual ... I love the creaky boards, though at first I thought my roof was caving in. Love the title of your book. A lost vessel floating through time to receive those who pass on.
You're quite right we all have our time to flounder, feel uncertainty and despair, and the scrape of those jagged rocks looming ahead. Your poem seems to represent the fear of death and then the acceptance as one boards for that last journey. The visual of the 'black orchids' and the audial of 'sweet silence swoons' provides me with a sense of peace as the last breath is drawn and it is time to leave "this earthly realm'.
Excellent use of alliteration, consonance and rhyme. Sombre, I imagine fearful for some, yet I find your poem accepting, peaceful and elegant in the way of stark reality.
Well done. Love Lovi xoxoxo
Hi Dean
Superb presentation as usual ... I love the creaky boards, though at first I thought my roof was caving in. Love the title of your book. A lost vessel floating through time to receive those who pass on.
You're quite right we all have our time to flounder, feel uncertainty and despair, and the scrape of those jagged rocks looming ahead. Your poem seems to represent the fear of death and then the acceptance as one boards for that last journey. The visual of the 'black orchids' and the audial of 'sweet silence swoons' provides me with a sense of peace as the last breath is drawn and it is time to leave "this earthly realm'.
Excellent use of alliteration, consonance and rhyme. Sombre, I imagine fearful for some, yet I find your poem accepting, peaceful and elegant in the way of stark reality.
Well done. Love Lovi xoxoxo
Comment Written 30-Jul-2014
Comment from GWHARGIS
I liked the message in this. I, myself have strapped myself to the wheel. Can you say Control Freak? LOL. No, really it is a moving message and well told poem. Beautiful and haunting imagery as the isolated tone gives an authentic feeling to the desolation of life alone.
I liked the message in this. I, myself have strapped myself to the wheel. Can you say Control Freak? LOL. No, really it is a moving message and well told poem. Beautiful and haunting imagery as the isolated tone gives an authentic feeling to the desolation of life alone.
Comment Written 30-Jul-2014
Comment from A Matter Of Words
This is a wonderful addition to your book, Dean. The creaking of the ship and the sound of the wind blowing is a terrific backdrop.
The emotion of failure and the depths some of us fall when we are not able to successfully steer through our lives is well depicted here. Funny how despair and depression find comfort in the night. I suppose daylight is too stark, and we can see that which we feel we have failed at. Great job.
This is a wonderful addition to your book, Dean. The creaking of the ship and the sound of the wind blowing is a terrific backdrop.
The emotion of failure and the depths some of us fall when we are not able to successfully steer through our lives is well depicted here. Funny how despair and depression find comfort in the night. I suppose daylight is too stark, and we can see that which we feel we have failed at. Great job.
Comment Written 30-Jul-2014
Comment from royowen
An outstanding write Dean, yes it's true the shipwrecked vessel is usually a great metaphor for the poor lost souls who, for one reason or many is adrift in a sea of despair! It amazes me how things in people's lives can appear to be ok, but behind closed doors....well written Dean, blessings, Roy.
An outstanding write Dean, yes it's true the shipwrecked vessel is usually a great metaphor for the poor lost souls who, for one reason or many is adrift in a sea of despair! It amazes me how things in people's lives can appear to be ok, but behind closed doors....well written Dean, blessings, Roy.
Comment Written 30-Jul-2014
Comment from Domino 2
Creepy ghostly background noises and perfect picture, Deano.
At first I thought it was the ghost ship talking, but then realised it was one of her (maybe the last) sailors who is in the process of 'passing on'
With the greatest respect, I think it would perhaps be spookier if IT WERE the ship talking throughout, but it's still excellent (as ever).
Best wishes, and good luck with the book, my friend.
Cheers, Ray
Creepy ghostly background noises and perfect picture, Deano.
At first I thought it was the ghost ship talking, but then realised it was one of her (maybe the last) sailors who is in the process of 'passing on'
With the greatest respect, I think it would perhaps be spookier if IT WERE the ship talking throughout, but it's still excellent (as ever).
Best wishes, and good luck with the book, my friend.
Cheers, Ray
Comment Written 30-Jul-2014
Comment from Nosha17
Clear metaphor about the uncertainty and perils of life. Very effective with the sound effects and the wording and rhymes are super as always. Your book next to mine on the shelf, what a contrast; I am very happy you are being published, well deserved and a great addition to bookstores-congratulations. This didn't scare me as much. Faye
Clear metaphor about the uncertainty and perils of life. Very effective with the sound effects and the wording and rhymes are super as always. Your book next to mine on the shelf, what a contrast; I am very happy you are being published, well deserved and a great addition to bookstores-congratulations. This didn't scare me as much. Faye
Comment Written 30-Jul-2014
Comment from sweetwoodjax
this is very well written, dean, you did an excellent job writing this picta poem, I just watched a movie yesterday called Ghost Ship where the people were given a second chance to change their lives. creepy. I woke up this morning with a verse in my head that won't leave me alone. I may try to do something with it, but I know you can do better.
I live for their screams.
Write a poem no more than a hundred words.
Ready Set Scream
this is very well written, dean, you did an excellent job writing this picta poem, I just watched a movie yesterday called Ghost Ship where the people were given a second chance to change their lives. creepy. I woke up this morning with a verse in my head that won't leave me alone. I may try to do something with it, but I know you can do better.
I live for their screams.
Write a poem no more than a hundred words.
Ready Set Scream
Comment Written 30-Jul-2014
Comment from Dorothy Farrell
Hi Dean - Five really good stanzas in perfect abab rhyme form. Some nice alliteration used 'mere meat' - 'sweet silence' - a spectacular display - wonderful picture - which, truly worth a thousand words. But your words here are excellent. Thank you for the interesting author notes. Your book of poems will be really enhanced by your choice of pictures. Kind regards Dorothy x ps - the last word on some of your line endings are slightly off the picture - I could not remedy but could see what the word was meant to be - you might check - maybe just my computer!
Hi Dean - Five really good stanzas in perfect abab rhyme form. Some nice alliteration used 'mere meat' - 'sweet silence' - a spectacular display - wonderful picture - which, truly worth a thousand words. But your words here are excellent. Thank you for the interesting author notes. Your book of poems will be really enhanced by your choice of pictures. Kind regards Dorothy x ps - the last word on some of your line endings are slightly off the picture - I could not remedy but could see what the word was meant to be - you might check - maybe just my computer!
Comment Written 30-Jul-2014
Comment from Phyllis Stewart
This has a very old lingo in it. I'm assuming they used to say phial instead of vial. I'm not sure I understand it, but it does have a creepy mood to it, as a ghost ship would.
I suggest you move the text over to the right a bit so those two words don't intersect the dark parts of the ship... made it look crowded as well as hard to read... I had to lean in near the screen to make out "night" and "I turn"... and it would also look better with a bit of space between text and ship. There is plenty of empty space to the right so just slide it over.
This has a very old lingo in it. I'm assuming they used to say phial instead of vial. I'm not sure I understand it, but it does have a creepy mood to it, as a ghost ship would.
I suggest you move the text over to the right a bit so those two words don't intersect the dark parts of the ship... made it look crowded as well as hard to read... I had to lean in near the screen to make out "night" and "I turn"... and it would also look better with a bit of space between text and ship. There is plenty of empty space to the right so just slide it over.
Comment Written 30-Jul-2014