Comment from country ranch writer

Excellent

So now what was she doing back in time and for what reason was it this time. Going back four years why? What was she supposed to do this time around?

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 Comment Written 19-Nov-2018

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reply by the author on 19-Nov-2018

You have asked all the questions Veronica asked. The answers will be in the next part. It would have been too long to put it in. The end of this part has Veronica realising she is in fact back in her own time, in 1996, but everything has changed. Thank you so much for reading and reviewing. :)) Sandra xx

Comment from robyn corum

Excellent

Sandra, (4)

*smile* I can't imagine how complicated it must be to write a time-travel storyline AND keep all the facts and dates and characters in line. I have a hard enough time when simply writing a normal-time novel! Therefore, I tip my hat to you AGAIN, my dear. Fab job!

And now, it looks like you are even adding some twists - yikes!

If you'll permit, I have made some notes below on a few things I spotted that may warrant further attention?
1.) painfully against my ribs, and decided to (lie) quietly on the floor in

2.) quietly on the floor in the unlit room for a few minutes until I'd worked
--> just wondering - if she suddenly pops into an unlit room, how can she so readily see that James wasn't there? Seems she'd need some light - or at least, time for her eyes to adjust.

3.) hangers, so I could only assume it was after 1985(,) the year that she'd died.

4.) But why (hadn't) I been sent back to my own time?

5.) that could give me a clue as to why (I'd) been sent back to

6.) as I was comin' down the lane and put the kettle on. ... Oh, it's good
--> questioning the combo of these two types of punctuation together

7.) large as life, (sitting) at the table with one foot on her knee as she massaged
--> or is this a regional thing? *smile*

8.) Now I knew what year it was, and the reality of what that implied, the room began to spin around me before I crashed to the floor....
--> Now I knew what year it was, and the reality of what that implied (made) the room began to spin around me before I crashed to the floor....
--> also notice the extra 'dot' in the ellipsis.

Thanks! As always, I enjoyed your talented imagination and the fun trip!

Please give me a holler if you decide to edit. Have a marvelous week!

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 Comment Written 19-Nov-2018

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reply by the author on 19-Nov-2018

Hi Robyn, thank you so much for your thorough review. I have made the tense corrections, and thanks for picking up the point about seeing James in the dark. I've made a change to that too. I've taken out the ellipsis between the two sentences of Mildred's. The only thing I'd question was the the forth 'dot' in the last ellipsis. I've been told and read that when you finish a sentence but there is more to come, you put your period and then the ellipsis directly after it.

Thank you again, my friend. :)) Sandra xx

reply by robyn corum on 19-Nov-2018

You may be entirely correct - I just haven't seen that before. Thanks for letting me know - I've already updated the rating.

reply by the author on 19-Nov-2018

Thank you, Robyn. :)) xxx