Comment from mfowler

Excellent

I love this, Tony.
Intertwining the breakdown of relationship with the images of this bleak landscape is wonderful. Each one you chose highlighted Spain's harsh region while giving a glimpse of the mood your voice is in. I know the regions around Madrid and recognise just what you mean. I thought some of your imagery was amazing as it draws on sensual response and ultimately, the reader's emotions. eg
The ancient town
disgorged
a soup of salt cod, spinach and chick peas
Excellent free verse.

 Comment Written 04-Jan-2015

---

reply by the author on 05-Jan-2015

Thanks, Mark. Good to have your comments based on first-hand knowledge of the landscape I was writing about. It exercises a strange power.

Comment from Jacqueline M Franklin

Excellent

Hi, Tony....

Uh-oh. From the bleakness portrayed in your well-chosen artwork and formatting---I'd say the relationship hit jagged rocks and headed south. Yep, that's what I'd say.

I'm glad you said this is NOT autobiographical. Whew!
Well penned and preasented.

Cheers & Blessings
Keep Smilin'... Jax (*:*)

 Comment Written 04-Jan-2015

---

reply by the author on 04-Jan-2015

Thanks, Jax. I appreciate you stopping by to review.

Comment from Glasstruth

Excellent

Reality and fantasy is something we all get lost in. Love the alliteration in " grey-green ghosts & bull breathed thin vapour." Your writing is precious and very descriptive. Fantastic free verse. Les

 Comment Written 04-Jan-2015

---

reply by the author on 04-Jan-2015

Thanks, Les, for your positive and encouraging comment.

Comment from Drew Delaney

Excellent

I really enjoyed reading this poem. The imagery was good - a bleak greyness of snow on distant mountains,
the foreground rocky, harsh and unforgiving,
a landscape of grey-green ghosts and pining

And the metaphor you used was very unique I thought. fog swirled, licking at the edges
of our relationship. Very good! Drew

 Comment Written 04-Jan-2015

---

reply by the author on 04-Jan-2015

Thanks, Drew. Glad you enjoyed it.

Comment from Walu Feral

Excellent

G'day Tony, I just noticed your name, I never said I was smart LOL. This is a great little iece and if I hadn't read your notes I would have thought it autobiographical. Great work Sir. Cheers Fez

 Comment Written 04-Jan-2015

---

reply by the author on 04-Jan-2015

Thanks, Fez.

Comment from krys123

Excellent

Tony; extremely well written and very outstanding in its imagery that was very descriptive and remarkably expressive: "A solitary bull breathed thin vapour across our final olive grow and fog swirled, licking at the edges of our relationship." The description of the surroundings are probably what I think is your journey, and your relationship is both you and someone else in a vehicle. A beautifully written poem and as a free verse poem goes its cadence in movement flowed quite well. Thank you for sharing and posting Tony in May your future always be bright as the sun will always shine on your shoulders.
Alex

This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.

 Comment Written 04-Jan-2015

---

reply by the author on 04-Jan-2015

Many thanks, Alex. Glad you enjoyed it.