A Picture's Worth a Thousand Poems
Viewing comments for Chapter 13 "~Creeper~"A compilation of pictapoems from my portfolio
46 total reviews
Comment from barkingdog
Fine rhyming quatrains, Dean. Perfect structure throughout.
Lots of good technique in this stanza. Let's look at it:
Deep demon's sleep, eternal hell,
1.alliteration: Deep demons
2. 'e' assonance: Deep demon's sleep
3. 'l' consonance: sleep eternal hell
ferocious fiery eyes--a spell--
4. alliteration: ferocious fiery
5. continued 'l' consonance: spell
Cast on your weak and mortal soul,
6. 'e' assonance continued
7. more 'l' consonance: moral soul
you'll have to stay, but long to go
8. continued 'l' consonance: you'll/ long
And, Dean, that was only one stanza. LOL.
You rocked this! Best of luck in the contest!
reply by the author on 26-Oct-2013
Fine rhyming quatrains, Dean. Perfect structure throughout.
Lots of good technique in this stanza. Let's look at it:
Deep demon's sleep, eternal hell,
1.alliteration: Deep demons
2. 'e' assonance: Deep demon's sleep
3. 'l' consonance: sleep eternal hell
ferocious fiery eyes--a spell--
4. alliteration: ferocious fiery
5. continued 'l' consonance: spell
Cast on your weak and mortal soul,
6. 'e' assonance continued
7. more 'l' consonance: moral soul
you'll have to stay, but long to go
8. continued 'l' consonance: you'll/ long
And, Dean, that was only one stanza. LOL.
You rocked this! Best of luck in the contest!
Comment Written 26-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 26-Oct-2013
-
Thanks, BD, and be sure to cast your vote. If not for my entry, then one pf the other fine poems in this fun contest.
Thanks again...
Anon 4 Now
Comment from KG Writes
Dear Unknown Author, The first introduction, your photo selection gave me a laugh before I even started to read your verse. Great choice. Fun read. Nice thought out set up. Good job over all. Best of luck in the contest. KG Writes
reply by the author on 26-Oct-2013
Dear Unknown Author, The first introduction, your photo selection gave me a laugh before I even started to read your verse. Great choice. Fun read. Nice thought out set up. Good job over all. Best of luck in the contest. KG Writes
Comment Written 26-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 26-Oct-2013
-
Thank you, KG Writes. I am very glad that you thought so, at least (LOL). Please, be sure to vote, if not for my poem, then one of the other fine entries. Lots of hard work went into these!
Thanks again, my friend...
-
Dear Unknown Author, It does take hard work, but it sure is fun. Again, best of luck, you are welcome, and have a great day.KG Writes
Comment from DR DIP
I so recognise this style!! love your work MR X lol
hope you go well. Another great production as usual.
good luck in the contest
as always dip
reply by the author on 26-Oct-2013
I so recognise this style!! love your work MR X lol
hope you go well. Another great production as usual.
good luck in the contest
as always dip
Comment Written 26-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 26-Oct-2013
-
Thanks very much, dipster. I think I'm gonna' really need it on this one!
Comment from mfowler
You've got great audio visual support for your creepy poem. It is well written with good rhythm and good descriptive language which builds a picture of foreboding evil.
reply by the author on 26-Oct-2013
You've got great audio visual support for your creepy poem. It is well written with good rhythm and good descriptive language which builds a picture of foreboding evil.
Comment Written 26-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 26-Oct-2013
-
Thanks very much, mfowler. I truly appreciate you fabulous review...
Comment from Silent1rose
This is a bit creepy indeed. I must say that I am creeped. LOL. Good poem, good flow. It probably wasn't a good idea to read it when I'm about to go back to sleep. :P lets hope my dream catcher isn't too full. Good work. ~ Rose
reply by the author on 26-Oct-2013
This is a bit creepy indeed. I must say that I am creeped. LOL. Good poem, good flow. It probably wasn't a good idea to read it when I'm about to go back to sleep. :P lets hope my dream catcher isn't too full. Good work. ~ Rose
Comment Written 26-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 26-Oct-2013
-
Thanks, Silent1rose. I appreciate the kind words, very much!
Is there ever a bad time to read a horror story, or poem, LOL?
Pleasant SCREAMS..., heh-heh~
-
LOL ^^
Comment from mrmorris69
I normally try to write something I think could be improved and something I liked, but I could not find anything wrong so great job.
reply by the author on 26-Oct-2013
I normally try to write something I think could be improved and something I liked, but I could not find anything wrong so great job.
Comment Written 26-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 26-Oct-2013
-
Well, thank you very much, mrmorris69. I appreciate the outstanding review, and I'm very glad you saw no errors. I have been known to make more than my fair share, LOL...
Comment from michaelcahill
this is just to creepy cool. brrrrr. I think this used to be my cousin and then the unemployment ran out. excellent writing and the presentation is most chilling and fiendish indeed. awesome, mikey
reply by the author on 26-Oct-2013
this is just to creepy cool. brrrrr. I think this used to be my cousin and then the unemployment ran out. excellent writing and the presentation is most chilling and fiendish indeed. awesome, mikey
Comment Written 26-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 26-Oct-2013
-
Thank you, Mikey! I am very grateful for your wonderful, encouraging review!
Comment from Nevermore713
Absolutely perfect. Definitely the best poem I have read in a very long time. You didn't have to change it for my behalf, but I definitely like this better. You are truly gifted, and I'm glad in get to call you my friend now n
reply by the author on 26-Oct-2013
Absolutely perfect. Definitely the best poem I have read in a very long time. You didn't have to change it for my behalf, but I definitely like this better. You are truly gifted, and I'm glad in get to call you my friend now n
Comment Written 26-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 26-Oct-2013
-
And I thank you for your kind and honest opinion, Nevermore713 (cool user name...very Poe-eque)...
-
Like I said, disturbing is kind of my thing, and you're welcome. I'm glad I got to read that. You have the kind of gift with words that I want to have.
-
I will endeavor to take a look at your work, ASAP, my friend. It appears we both have very similar tastes in literature.
Thanks again, my friend.
-
Can't say I've put anything that good on here, but I appreciate you wanting to look at my work. You and I will become fast friends.
-
Hey, you can never have too many good friends, right?
-
I seem to scare all mine away so it's good to always be making new ones
-
Hah, well, you would be hard pressed to scare me away. I also took your advice and changed Creeper. Look at it now, let me know if you like it better...
-
Love it. The flickering candles are a very good touch. I can honestly it kind of creeped me out.
-
Thanks! I always listen to those who read my work. If I should ever stop, I may as lay down my quill and move on, LOL...
-
You know my name, well username at least, but I have no idea what yours is so I can see what else comes from that brain of yours...
Comment from lancellot
Yes, I do believe you've hit writing prompts target. Very creepy. I don't think even Buffy would atempt your vampire's castle. Good structure on the poem and perfect presitation.
reply by the author on 26-Oct-2013
Yes, I do believe you've hit writing prompts target. Very creepy. I don't think even Buffy would atempt your vampire's castle. Good structure on the poem and perfect presitation.
Comment Written 26-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 26-Oct-2013
-
Thanks, lancellot. I am very glad that you liked this little terror tale!
Comment from Lovinia
Hi Mystery Poet
Hmmm ... I can't imagine whose entry this is??? Blind I am ..... lol never-the-less, even without the identification of presentation, your poem would be outstanding. Love it and no six for you unfortunately. Love the wind effect. Pure genius you are Dean. Allit., consonance and assonance, enjambment ... all the exciting poetic techniques.... as per usual. :)))
Well you've scared me to death .... I think I'm having a heart attack right now ... your fault ...
Meter and rhyme are perfect. Dare I say? Good luck in the contest. Now I'm off to check the other entries ..... though I have stopped breathing. :)))
PERFECT!! Hugs - Lovi xoxoxoox
reply by the author on 26-Oct-2013
Hi Mystery Poet
Hmmm ... I can't imagine whose entry this is??? Blind I am ..... lol never-the-less, even without the identification of presentation, your poem would be outstanding. Love it and no six for you unfortunately. Love the wind effect. Pure genius you are Dean. Allit., consonance and assonance, enjambment ... all the exciting poetic techniques.... as per usual. :)))
Well you've scared me to death .... I think I'm having a heart attack right now ... your fault ...
Meter and rhyme are perfect. Dare I say? Good luck in the contest. Now I'm off to check the other entries ..... though I have stopped breathing. :)))
PERFECT!! Hugs - Lovi xoxoxoox
Comment Written 26-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 26-Oct-2013
-
Hah ha!, thank you so much Lovinia. I am very happy that you liked this crazy thing!
-
LOL You are unbelievable .... love all your crazies! :)))