Just believe!
Somethings never die, if only you will ....50 total reviews
Comment from hvysmker
Very good, Carol. I didn't see any errors.
For some of us, Puff has different connotations. During the Vietnam war, that's what they called DC-3s that flew around our base at night. Those were more scary dragons containing what was called "miniguns" that could cover every inch of a football field with bullets in about a minute. I doubt our enemy cared much for those dragons.
I remember one time, late at night, when I left my tent to go to the latrine (outside toilet.) It was dark and silent, though I had a loaded rifle with me (A post rule.)
Suddenly Puff the Magic Dragon showed himself. A searchlight came down from the sky like dragon breath, illuminating me and the crapper as bright as day. A loudspeaker said "Groooowwwlll," which scared me so much I didn't need the shitter.
Charlie
reply by the author on 19-Nov-2009
Very good, Carol. I didn't see any errors.
For some of us, Puff has different connotations. During the Vietnam war, that's what they called DC-3s that flew around our base at night. Those were more scary dragons containing what was called "miniguns" that could cover every inch of a football field with bullets in about a minute. I doubt our enemy cared much for those dragons.
I remember one time, late at night, when I left my tent to go to the latrine (outside toilet.) It was dark and silent, though I had a loaded rifle with me (A post rule.)
Suddenly Puff the Magic Dragon showed himself. A searchlight came down from the sky like dragon breath, illuminating me and the crapper as bright as day. A loudspeaker said "Groooowwwlll," which scared me so much I didn't need the shitter.
Charlie
Comment Written 19-Nov-2009
reply by the author on 19-Nov-2009
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hvysmker
My ex (we are good friends) has shared a few wild and horrible stories about Vietnam too. I am glad that wasn't the Puff the Magic Dragon I was talking about. Smiles to you...Carol
Comment from fictionwriter
I enjoyed this jump into the past. We all have those things we used to imagine when we were young. Some of us still imagine, that's what makes us writers. I love this. One little thing, I thought crocuses only bloomed in the early spring? At least that's when they bloom where I live. Great job.
reply by the author on 19-Nov-2009
I enjoyed this jump into the past. We all have those things we used to imagine when we were young. Some of us still imagine, that's what makes us writers. I love this. One little thing, I thought crocuses only bloomed in the early spring? At least that's when they bloom where I live. Great job.
Comment Written 19-Nov-2009
reply by the author on 19-Nov-2009
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Joy
Actually. you are right. When I put autumn mist from the song, I changed the first lines from spring to autumn and forgot to change the flowers. Duh! Thanks for spotting that...Appreciate the review.
Carol
Comment from WRITER1
I remember the song well. I was always fond of the song, I had no idea it was about drugs. I was a very naive child. I loved your story.
reply by the author on 19-Nov-2009
I remember the song well. I was always fond of the song, I had no idea it was about drugs. I was a very naive child. I loved your story.
Comment Written 19-Nov-2009
reply by the author on 19-Nov-2009
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Donna
Never written fantasy before...Joined the contest thinking it was flash fiction...oops! so I just had to give it a shot. Thanks for the review. CArol
Comment from Writeaway...
Excellent competition entry Begin Again, I think you have a shot at winning, you can certainly count on me to vote for you. I found no spags and was kept interested throughout the story. Excellent job, keep writing!!
reply by the author on 19-Nov-2009
Excellent competition entry Begin Again, I think you have a shot at winning, you can certainly count on me to vote for you. I found no spags and was kept interested throughout the story. Excellent job, keep writing!!
Comment Written 19-Nov-2009
reply by the author on 19-Nov-2009
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Jake
Thank you so much for the encouragement. I have never written fantasy before...I was kind of worried about it. Appreciate the kind comments. Carol
Comment from Colette
Carol,
I enjoyed this so so much, I guess, apart from being an incurable romantic
I am also a child at heart. So here is a six for you. I remember Puff the Magic
Dragon!
Colette
reply by the author on 19-Nov-2009
Carol,
I enjoyed this so so much, I guess, apart from being an incurable romantic
I am also a child at heart. So here is a six for you. I remember Puff the Magic
Dragon!
Colette
Comment Written 19-Nov-2009
reply by the author on 19-Nov-2009
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Colette
You are so good for my morale. I have never written fantasy before...Actually when I joined the contest I thought it was just flash fiction...then I reread it!I was worried to death...Thank you so much. You put a big smile on my face...Carol
Comment from patwannabe
Well done. I like what you did to the song. I loved Peter, Paul and mary, the Christy Minstrels, the Serendipity Singers, Limeliters, John Denver and all the rest of hootenanny. So sorry that music is gone. I found the video of Puff this year. Was so excited to show it to my grandkids. I don't think it had the same effect on them that it did on me back in the sixies. Thanks for sharing, pat
reply by the author on 19-Nov-2009
Well done. I like what you did to the song. I loved Peter, Paul and mary, the Christy Minstrels, the Serendipity Singers, Limeliters, John Denver and all the rest of hootenanny. So sorry that music is gone. I found the video of Puff this year. Was so excited to show it to my grandkids. I don't think it had the same effect on them that it did on me back in the sixies. Thanks for sharing, pat
Comment Written 19-Nov-2009
reply by the author on 19-Nov-2009
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PatPat
Thanks for the gret review. I really appreciate it since this was my first attempt at fantasy. Smiles, Carol
Comment from Sally Carter
Absolutely charming. I well remember Puff the Magic Dragon! And it was great to see the words in print. I loved the way you had the caterpillar climbing up the old man's leg and talking to him. This could be the beginning of lots of different stories. Tightly written, fast moving, and no nits jumped out at me. Good luck with your entry. Sally
reply by the author on 19-Nov-2009
Absolutely charming. I well remember Puff the Magic Dragon! And it was great to see the words in print. I loved the way you had the caterpillar climbing up the old man's leg and talking to him. This could be the beginning of lots of different stories. Tightly written, fast moving, and no nits jumped out at me. Good luck with your entry. Sally
Comment Written 19-Nov-2009
reply by the author on 19-Nov-2009
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Sally
Thanks so much...I was worried to death. First attempt at fantasy. You made me feel so much better. Carol
Comment from BJean
I love to be around children and play and get drawn into their, imagination. We laugh and giggle. I watch 2 year old triplets twice a week. Yesterday, we were playing and one stopped and said, Jean, I like you to come to our house. They so appreciate when we just make-believe!! Very well written story with grandpa. It held my attention and I saw no mistakes. Jean
reply by the author on 19-Nov-2009
I love to be around children and play and get drawn into their, imagination. We laugh and giggle. I watch 2 year old triplets twice a week. Yesterday, we were playing and one stopped and said, Jean, I like you to come to our house. They so appreciate when we just make-believe!! Very well written story with grandpa. It held my attention and I saw no mistakes. Jean
Comment Written 19-Nov-2009
reply by the author on 19-Nov-2009
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Jean
Thanks so much for the kind review. I truly appreciate your comments. Carol
Comment from missy98writer
Began Again,
You are so marvelous writing this wonderful story "Just Believe" for the fantasy flash fiction contest.
I absolutely loved this flash fiction story. Kudos for adding in the part about Puff the Magic Dragon. I adored that story and song when I was younger. I loved this paragraph you've written. Jack closed his eyes. He thought of a time when a magic dragon lived by the sea and frolicked in the autumn mist in a land called Honah Lee. Together they traveled on a boat with billowed sail. Jackie perched on Puff's gigantic tail. Noble kings and princes bowed whenever they came. Pirate ships lowered their flags when Puff roared their name."
I loved how you made this story about Jackie when he's older, how wonderful. You made me pull up google and I typed in the song and I'm listening to the great song.
This is five stars of fantasy.
Good luck on the prompt, now I don't want to attempt mine this was too good, but alas my muse will force me to write something.
Melissa.
reply by the author on 19-Nov-2009
Began Again,
You are so marvelous writing this wonderful story "Just Believe" for the fantasy flash fiction contest.
I absolutely loved this flash fiction story. Kudos for adding in the part about Puff the Magic Dragon. I adored that story and song when I was younger. I loved this paragraph you've written. Jack closed his eyes. He thought of a time when a magic dragon lived by the sea and frolicked in the autumn mist in a land called Honah Lee. Together they traveled on a boat with billowed sail. Jackie perched on Puff's gigantic tail. Noble kings and princes bowed whenever they came. Pirate ships lowered their flags when Puff roared their name."
I loved how you made this story about Jackie when he's older, how wonderful. You made me pull up google and I typed in the song and I'm listening to the great song.
This is five stars of fantasy.
Good luck on the prompt, now I don't want to attempt mine this was too good, but alas my muse will force me to write something.
Melissa.
Comment Written 19-Nov-2009
reply by the author on 19-Nov-2009
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Melissa
I had never before done it so jump right in there girl...Good luck and thank you for the review. Carol
Comment from lola29
Carol, this was a great read. I really needed to hear your words today, 'You just have to believe.' I'm very impressed with how you managed to pull me into the scene where Jackie was sitting on the bench--wonderful!
reply by the author on 19-Nov-2009
Carol, this was a great read. I really needed to hear your words today, 'You just have to believe.' I'm very impressed with how you managed to pull me into the scene where Jackie was sitting on the bench--wonderful!
Comment Written 19-Nov-2009
reply by the author on 19-Nov-2009
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Lola
Me too! I wrote this story at 4 a.m. just before I took my honey to the hospital for surgery...I was really worried...Everything came out okay...I just needed to believe....If you need anything ..you know where to find me...Always there for you. Smiles, Carol