Old Man at the River
An old man paints a river scene34 total reviews
Comment from RJ Heritage
Nostalgic indeed. I like the theme and the approach to this poem. To me it shows how uneventful life might be in ending. Luckily there was a boat to the rescue. I found that little details made it realistic, like him not noticing the drawing man, so it is not on his canvas. Initially I found the line spacing was a little wide, but it fits the overall presentation. Cleverly written poem with imagery in a painting created by the writer's own hands.
RJ
reply by the author on 15-Jan-2025
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Nostalgic indeed. I like the theme and the approach to this poem. To me it shows how uneventful life might be in ending. Luckily there was a boat to the rescue. I found that little details made it realistic, like him not noticing the drawing man, so it is not on his canvas. Initially I found the line spacing was a little wide, but it fits the overall presentation. Cleverly written poem with imagery in a painting created by the writer's own hands.
RJ
Comment Written 15-Jan-2025
reply by the author on 15-Jan-2025
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Thank you for all of your feedback and for this wonderful review
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You're welcome
RJ
Comment from Debbie D'Arcy
I like the way one scene trips into another and life passes before him as he paints his picture. I think you could go on writing poetry forever, Pam. It seems to flow effortlessly and you're never deterred, e.g. ducks and flux. A delightful concept in this that the painting is a tribute to his deceased mother. And cheer is generated from sadness.
Better if you simply say: Old man at the river (without 's)
Well done, Pam! Debbie
reply by the author on 15-Jan-2025
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I like the way one scene trips into another and life passes before him as he paints his picture. I think you could go on writing poetry forever, Pam. It seems to flow effortlessly and you're never deterred, e.g. ducks and flux. A delightful concept in this that the painting is a tribute to his deceased mother. And cheer is generated from sadness.
Better if you simply say: Old man at the river (without 's)
Well done, Pam! Debbie
Comment Written 15-Jan-2025
reply by the author on 15-Jan-2025
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Hi Deb thank you for your thorough and usual delightful review
I'm not sure what you mean about removing the 's
It would then say old man at the river painting the scene which is not a full sentence
Thanks again
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Ok, I see now. It just seemed a bit awkward tagged on to river. Maybe better as Old man('s)...
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Yes I thought of tat too. I'll change it now
Comment from DonandVicki
A very interesting poem that captures a painting in poetic verse, very original. Your painting fits and complements your poem very well. I enjoyed the read.
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reply by the author on 15-Jan-2025
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A very interesting poem that captures a painting in poetic verse, very original. Your painting fits and complements your poem very well. I enjoyed the read.
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Comment Written 15-Jan-2025
reply by the author on 15-Jan-2025
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Thank you so much for your beautiful review
Comment from patcelaw
This is a very nicely written and beautifully presented for about an old man at the sea with his paint painting what he seeing. I enjoyed very much reading it because I am an amateur artist myself. May you have a pleasant day and may God bless you. Patricia.
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reply by the author on 15-Jan-2025
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This is a very nicely written and beautifully presented for about an old man at the sea with his paint painting what he seeing. I enjoyed very much reading it because I am an amateur artist myself. May you have a pleasant day and may God bless you. Patricia.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 15-Jan-2025
reply by the author on 15-Jan-2025
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Thank you, Patricia for sharing that you are an artist and for your wonderful review
