Reviews from

Route 66: Fetal Memories

Birthed Memories

43 total reviews 
Comment from Annmuma
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

This is a well-written story. I have not heard the word pickaninny since I was a child in Louisiana and sort of wish I had not heard it today. It was so hurtful to a lot of kids of my age, but a different color, in those days. To be very honest, I really hate that your mom and dad found it funny and didn't offer an explanation to you to prevent your ever actually saying it.

Nevertheless, Jay, this story is written the from heart and does ring true.

Have one question: Is 'wrapt' correct? Or should it be 'wrapped'?

ann

 Comment Written 26-Feb-2023


reply by the author on 26-Feb-2023
    Yes, you are right about Picanninny. I don't like using it either. But it's part of the fabric of my story. My parents had their racial prejudices as did so many in the 40s and 50s. As to wrapt vs. wrapped. Google tells me both are acceptable, but I'm changing it to wrapped since one source says wrapt is a misspelling of rapt. Thank you for pointing it out.

    Jay
Comment from Sally Law
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

This is as adorable and sweet as I suspect you are. Dang, if you didn't just win the contest too. As Dorothy Farrell said to me once, "If you don't win this contest, I'll eat my hat!" You didn't rush and took your time. A throughlly delightful read, dear Jay.

I had the world's worst sunburn though. I had to go through the emergency room. Yeah. Wicked bad and man did it itch!!

Sending you my best today as always, and best wishes for the upcoming contest. (Standing by, hoping I won't have to eat my fedora.)

Blessings,
Sal XOs


 Comment Written 26-Feb-2023


reply by the author on 26-Feb-2023
    Not so fast, Sally. The contest goes for two more months. But just to know it resonates is a winning feeling. And I get to wear it regardless of a contest. Thank you for that!

    Jay
Comment from susand3022
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

NO!!! You didn't!!! LOLOL Oh, Jay... from the mouths of babes. Hahahaha!
This is such a funny story! I loved reading it so much. I just scanned back to see how long it was because I just slipped right through it. A very quick and easy read for something most FS people would find "long". Glad I'm not one of those people, the things they miss!
Thanks again for the laughs!
Loved this!
Susan :)

 Comment Written 26-Feb-2023


reply by the author on 26-Feb-2023
    Susan, you are so sweet, and since your compliment feels so right and deepfelt, I'm not going to "aw shucks!" it, but just hold it and adore it as all honest compliments should be held and adored. Thank you, Susan.

    Jay
Comment from Terry Broxson
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

The writer of the year strikes again! Everybody else who enters this contest is playing for second place. Jay, this is a great memoir. I traveled many times on 66. As I read your story, Nate King Cole's voice accompanied me as "You got Your Kicks on Route 66!" Exceptional. Terry.

 Comment Written 26-Feb-2023


reply by the author on 26-Feb-2023
    Oh, wow! Terry, thank you. You know what? (This is the honest to God truth!) As I wrote this I found myself asking, "why do I feel like this could easily have been Terry writing about his memories with his Dad?" Yes, the route 66 experience is special. Thank you for sharing a little bit of the back seat with me. (Dang! That didn't sound right! LOL)
    Jay
reply by Terry Broxson on 26-Feb-2023
    Jay, In 1962 my father and me were driving to Lake City, Colorado, in his 1961 Pontiac Bonneville. In a separate car were his business partner and best friend Jerry Bartley and his son.

    Jerry owned a mountain cabin in Lake City.

    We had stopped for lunch at Clines Corner. It is at the intersection of Route 66 and Hwy 285.

    Leaving the dinner, my dad pulled across Route 66 and was turning north on 285. He almost made it. A westbound car clipped the rear panel.

    The Bonneville was damaged but driveable. The other car's bumper was damaged but also driveable.

    The highway patrol investigated and gave my dad a ticket for causing the accident.

    This was New Mexico, so, the highway patrol officer took Dad straight to the Judge.

    My Dad's defense was, "If I had been speeding I would have made it across the intersection."

    The Judge fined him $50. That was all he had. But Jerry loaned him fifty bucks for the rest of the trip. Terry.
reply by the author on 26-Feb-2023
    Now, See?! That was a hilarious story. You gotta bring your stories back to us, Terry!
    Jay
reply by Terry Broxson on 26-Feb-2023
    LOL
Comment from Jim Wile
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Ah, Jay. Wonderful story! Just like a 10-year-old to latch onto a funny phrase and repeat it over and over, hoping to extract more laughs from it. I can remember doing the same, myself.

This was so well-written and evoked the mood of the time and the scenes very well. I always love how you put things: "All this added to the magical cloak of invincibility into which his presence wrapt us."
and
"Route 66, stretches like a diagonal caesarian slice across the hot belly of America; out of that incision, these restless fetal memories rise:"

Great job with this amusing and interesting story of your memorable family vacation. Jim

 Comment Written 26-Feb-2023


reply by the author on 26-Feb-2023
    Jim, thank you for your kind words. I was hoping my early experiences would draw out similar thoughts in the reader. Apparently, it worked. Again, I appreciate you!
Comment from John Ciarmello
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

I've heard of some crazy advertising stunts in my day, but this one takes the cake, Jay!
Your story systematically transports us back in time to a place that is (yours) and simultaneously gives the reader a small slice of relatable nostalgia.
I felt your excitement and the moments of fame you felt in getting your parents to laugh.
A completely enjoyable and transparent look into an event in Junie's life! I loved this story! Best, JohnC

 Comment Written 26-Feb-2023


reply by the author on 26-Feb-2023
    John, thank you so much! You don't know how happy I am that you found my experiences relatable. I was hoping to touch that same nerve in each reader. I'm happy to hear I was on the mark with you!
    Jay
Comment from Shirley McLain
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Thank you for sharing that wonderful story of Route 66. It brought back so many memories for me. You did a wonderful job. Have a blessed Sunday. Shirley

 Comment Written 26-Feb-2023


reply by the author on 26-Feb-2023
    Thank you, Shirley. Route 66! Ah the memories. I wanted to talk about the roadside stands with all the Indian jewelry, the silver and turquoise, and leather I can smell to this day, but it was already long.
reply by Shirley McLain on 26-Feb-2023
    Coming through the desert one time I say this white stuff all over the sides of the road. It was probably 110 outside, so in all my acurate thinking ability at the time I asked Mom if it was snow. I gave my parents a good laugh and told me it was salt. Some things are never forgotten, no matter our age. Shirley
reply by the author on 26-Feb-2023
    That's funny, confusing salt with snow. And it showed a pretty inquisitive mind at work!
Comment from Ulla
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Hi Jay, what a delightful story and memory. I can certainly understand it's something you've never forgotten.
The ending was so funny, I can just imagine your parents faces when you repeated that punchline. I was right there with you all. All best and good luck. Ulla:)))

 Comment Written 26-Feb-2023


reply by the author on 26-Feb-2023
    Ah, Ulla, I'd share our table at the Captain's table with you any day! Thank you for your kindness.

    Jay
reply by Ulla on 26-Feb-2023
    And I would love to be there, lol
Comment from Wayne Fowler
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

I love it. You did well not to repeat "pickin' any" at the end. Nice touch.
We've driven a lot of the old 66 on our travels. Some of it was quite fun.
You brought back fond memories of drawing invisible, non-encroachment lines in bench seats.
Best wishes.

 Comment Written 26-Feb-2023


reply by the author on 26-Feb-2023
    I'm so happy that reading my story elicited such feelings from you. Thank you for your wonderful review.
    Jay
Comment from royowen
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

I had my first crush when I was 6 or seven. I still remember her name, Jean Hughes, I even dreamt of marrying her, living in a treehouse, as one does when one is a small, but yours was much older, mine would never be, we moved 10:000 miles to Australia two years later. I loved your expressive story Jay, well done, is that why you're called Jay? Well done Roy

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 Comment Written 26-Feb-2023


reply by the author on 26-Feb-2023
    Yes, I chose Jay in my freshman year of high school when my English teacher, Mrs. Bain, announced in front of the whole class after roll-call, that Junie is a girl's name. I changed it right then. I think it broke my Mom's heart, but you don't mess with a 13-year-old's masculinity. Thanks, Roy, for being a part of my story.
    Jay
reply by royowen on 26-Feb-2023
    Yep, I don?t Blair you