This Time - That Time 3
Viewing comments for Chapter 24 " The Door"Third book in the time travel trilogy
35 total reviews
Comment from Tootsie55
Great chapter again. This is a very exciting story. Keep up the good work. Plenty of drama and you have us in the palm of your hand. Absolutely no spags at all. Well done!
reply by the author on 14-Jan-2019
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Great chapter again. This is a very exciting story. Keep up the good work. Plenty of drama and you have us in the palm of your hand. Absolutely no spags at all. Well done!
Comment Written 14-Jan-2019
reply by the author on 14-Jan-2019
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That's nice to know! lol. Thank you so much, Tootsie, for another lovely review. :)) Sandra xxx
Comment from Rhonda Skinner
This is very well-written. I noticed one spot where there's an r missing in Mildred. Milded frowned and turned away ..... I enjoy following this story.
reply by the author on 14-Jan-2019
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This is very well-written. I noticed one spot where there's an r missing in Mildred. Milded frowned and turned away ..... I enjoy following this story.
Comment Written 14-Jan-2019
reply by the author on 14-Jan-2019
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I don't know how many times I went over this part and never noticed that, in fact, you are the only one who did! So thank you very much for pointing that out. I don't know how I would get on without my eagle eyed reviewers! lol. Thank you so much, Rhonda, for this really lovely review. I really appreciated it. Big hugs, my friend. :)) Sandra xx
Comment from TheStoryMan
The powers that be sure aren't making it easy are they? Another great chapter. I hope they can figure out how to save the patients. This is a very well written chapter.
reply by the author on 14-Jan-2019
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The powers that be sure aren't making it easy are they? Another great chapter. I hope they can figure out how to save the patients. This is a very well written chapter.
Comment Written 14-Jan-2019
reply by the author on 14-Jan-2019
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No, they aren't and they won't, they can't interfere that way, but can drop a few discreet clues to point Veronica in the right direction. Thank you so much for this lovely review, my friend, I really appreciate you reading my story and the interest you've shown. Big hugs, Sandra. xxx
Comment from aryr
The level of suspense was amazing Sandra. You presented it first as Veronica searched and searched. Then when she managed to return to Mildred more was created through Mildred's attempted conversation with Veronica. Then once again as the two of them find the door but it was locked. You did a great job writing this chapter. Excitement, intrigue and suspense bound it. Very enjoyable. Hugs and smiles my friend.
reply by the author on 14-Jan-2019
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The level of suspense was amazing Sandra. You presented it first as Veronica searched and searched. Then when she managed to return to Mildred more was created through Mildred's attempted conversation with Veronica. Then once again as the two of them find the door but it was locked. You did a great job writing this chapter. Excitement, intrigue and suspense bound it. Very enjoyable. Hugs and smiles my friend.
Comment Written 13-Jan-2019
reply by the author on 14-Jan-2019
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That is such a lovely review, Alie, thank you so much! Veronica can relax a little now she's back with Mildred. They are lost without each other. I'm so very pleased you like this story, thanks, my friend. :)) Sandra xxx
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You are so welcome Sandra, it is very enjoyable to read, you are doing a fantastic job with not only the creation of the story flow but with the level of mystery and suspense. Hugs and smiles.
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Aww, thank you!! :))
Comment from Phyllis Stewart
The door is locked. Now what? Can either of them pick a lock? Is there a key under a rock? There seems to be no end to Veronica's problems. I wonder where the door leads. To the outside or to an underground shelter? Guess I'll find out someday in the distant future. Surely you can write more than one chapter per week. I usually forget what happened between posts. C'mon, start typing! :)
reply by the author on 14-Jan-2019
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The door is locked. Now what? Can either of them pick a lock? Is there a key under a rock? There seems to be no end to Veronica's problems. I wonder where the door leads. To the outside or to an underground shelter? Guess I'll find out someday in the distant future. Surely you can write more than one chapter per week. I usually forget what happened between posts. C'mon, start typing! :)
Comment Written 13-Jan-2019
reply by the author on 14-Jan-2019
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Thank you so very much for the six stars, my dear friend! Is there a key under a rock? LOL, Now I know where to look for yours when I sneak over one of these days! lol. I've been posting 2 a week since the New Year. I can't go any faster, it's doing my head in, :( but I'm also enjoying it. Big Panda hugs, (they are the cutest kind.:) xxx Sandra
Comment from barbara.wilkey
So there's another hook. How are they going to get the door unlocked? I thought we had it all figured out by going to the basement, but now a new problem. I really like this story.
reply by the author on 14-Jan-2019
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So there's another hook. How are they going to get the door unlocked? I thought we had it all figured out by going to the basement, but now a new problem. I really like this story.
Comment Written 13-Jan-2019
reply by the author on 14-Jan-2019
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Thank you, Barbara, for this lovely review, and all the stars. I'm really pleased you are still enjoying my story. Big hugs, my friend. :)) Sandra xxx
Comment from tfawcus
You certainly know how to build up the tension, and then keep us hanging! All the little bumps along the way, small obstacles to overcome, have a cumulative effect. Mildred's dialect is spot on, as usual.
No spags, as far as I can see. I might possibly have written 'I was stumped as to where to go from here' instead of 'I was stumped as to where I go from here'. The two 'I's seemed just a bit awkward to my ear.
I'm anticipating that the next chapter is going to be a blockbuster. Persuading people that they need to evacuate will be one thing, and actually getting everyone out will, I feel sure, be fraught with difficulty!
reply by the author on 14-Jan-2019
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You certainly know how to build up the tension, and then keep us hanging! All the little bumps along the way, small obstacles to overcome, have a cumulative effect. Mildred's dialect is spot on, as usual.
No spags, as far as I can see. I might possibly have written 'I was stumped as to where to go from here' instead of 'I was stumped as to where I go from here'. The two 'I's seemed just a bit awkward to my ear.
I'm anticipating that the next chapter is going to be a blockbuster. Persuading people that they need to evacuate will be one thing, and actually getting everyone out will, I feel sure, be fraught with difficulty!
Comment Written 13-Jan-2019
reply by the author on 14-Jan-2019
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Thank you so much for all those lovely stars, Tony, and the wonderful review. I will go and look at that sentence again, you might be right. I'll read it out aloud. Thanks for the helpful suggestion, that was so kind of you.The next few chapters will be fraught with lots of problems, how they sort them will be fun to find out. :)) Big hugs, my friend. Sandra xx
Comment from WryWriter
Locked? Oh my! Got to turn the page! The "Now what?" is twirling in my head. The urgency comes through loud and clear. Great job bringing that out in the reader in this chapter.
Just a few reminders below that less is more to readers. It helps them stay on track with the mental picture in their minds along with their emotions in response to scenes they read. Examples:
I sighed and gave one last look at the garden before I returned to the computer and sat back down,
(I sighed and gave the garden a last look before returning to the computer.) No need to state "sat back down" as reader automatically fills this movement in.
making myself comfortable before I scrolled down the page in the hope of finding some clues.
(I made myself comfortable and then scrolled down the page searching for clues.)
Flicking over to the next page,
(Flicking to the next page,)
Okay, now don't leave me hanging...the door is locked and bombing is soon to be!
reply by the author on 14-Jan-2019
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Locked? Oh my! Got to turn the page! The "Now what?" is twirling in my head. The urgency comes through loud and clear. Great job bringing that out in the reader in this chapter.
Just a few reminders below that less is more to readers. It helps them stay on track with the mental picture in their minds along with their emotions in response to scenes they read. Examples:
I sighed and gave one last look at the garden before I returned to the computer and sat back down,
(I sighed and gave the garden a last look before returning to the computer.) No need to state "sat back down" as reader automatically fills this movement in.
making myself comfortable before I scrolled down the page in the hope of finding some clues.
(I made myself comfortable and then scrolled down the page searching for clues.)
Flicking over to the next page,
(Flicking to the next page,)
Okay, now don't leave me hanging...the door is locked and bombing is soon to be!
Comment Written 13-Jan-2019
reply by the author on 14-Jan-2019
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Thank you so much for this lovely review, WW, and for the lovely input. I've used them all and will be going over it all the previous chapter again when I've finished this first draft, seeing how much more I can tighten. That was most kind of you, my friend. Thank you. Big hugs, Sandra xx
Comment from damommy
I'm amazed at how you keep a wonderful plot going and still hold everyone's attention. They found the door, but it's locked. I'd take a hammer to the doorknob and get in there. And they'd better hurry.
reply by the author on 14-Jan-2019
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I'm amazed at how you keep a wonderful plot going and still hold everyone's attention. They found the door, but it's locked. I'd take a hammer to the doorknob and get in there. And they'd better hurry.
Comment Written 13-Jan-2019
reply by the author on 14-Jan-2019
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Aw, thank you, Yvonne, I'm having loads of fun with this one, it's my hardest assignment for the girls to solve, what with the suffragettes and WW1, both of which we'll be going back to. I'll see if there's a hammer around, lol. Thanks you for the lovely review, my friend. Big hugs, Sandra xxxx
Comment from l.raven
Hi Sandra, what is she suppose to be doing???...well ...not mowing the lawn!!!!...or the dishes...what does she think she should be doing???...finding Mildred...she's missing...
ok!!! finely...Mildred...now lets get some muscle down here...open these doors...people who can us wheelchairs ...start rolling...people who can walk...start walking...and those that are bed ridden...start praying...
so glad they are back together...now get the doors open...
really a awesome chapter my wonderful sweet friend...really keeps you hopping...a great build sweet girl...VERYYYY well written...ya know I love you MUCH...Linda xxoo...
prayed for Sarah in church today...God Bless...love xxoo
reply by the author on 14-Jan-2019
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Hi Sandra, what is she suppose to be doing???...well ...not mowing the lawn!!!!...or the dishes...what does she think she should be doing???...finding Mildred...she's missing...
ok!!! finely...Mildred...now lets get some muscle down here...open these doors...people who can us wheelchairs ...start rolling...people who can walk...start walking...and those that are bed ridden...start praying...
so glad they are back together...now get the doors open...
really a awesome chapter my wonderful sweet friend...really keeps you hopping...a great build sweet girl...VERYYYY well written...ya know I love you MUCH...Linda xxoo...
prayed for Sarah in church today...God Bless...love xxoo
Comment Written 13-Jan-2019
reply by the author on 14-Jan-2019
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LOL!! I think she had a mental breakdown for a minute there, Linda, it's all the stress the author is under, she's no help at all!!!! lol. That was hilarious, '....those that are bed ridden ... start praying! LOL, you are so funny! I think my husband knows whose review I'm reading when I get to yours now, where I'm laughing so much. Yes, they're back together, now the fun will really begin. Thanks my dear friend, and a humongous hug for the 6 stars! Love you lots, and sending more hugs (to share with Noah when you see him) xxxx Sandra xxx
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OK!!!! tell the author to have a good stiff drink...and relax...Now...they need to bring Veronica back again...alive...she's no good this way...all she can do is talk...and walk through walls...not going to help Mildred to much...I will tell Kristy to hug him for you...he got he's music birthday card I sent him...and some money I sent him...he called me yesterday to say thank you...I said...what are you going to buy me???...he got so quiet...and my daughter said...grandma is kidding...now if that had been Abby(his sister) she would have said nothing...it's all for me...and laughed...he is such a gentle soul...for being a dinosaur...LOL...love you xxoo
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AWW, the poor child, you must have left him traumatised! LOL, bless his heart. Cruel grandma! LOL!!! :)) xx
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LMBO...smiling back at you...your too funny...later...I have to run my car over to my sons shop..I need an oil change...I'll traumatize him for awhile... but he is like Abby...he just laughs at me...LOL...no respect...LOL...loveeeee ya...xxoo