Reviews from

Along the Jericho Road

Viewing comments for Chapter 18 "Yaza Moon"
Murder Mystery

49 total reviews 
Comment from Crystal Carey
Excellent
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Fabulous story, I need to catch up with whatever came before this part. I enjoyed reading the story, it leaves you wondering who they thought was the killer. I hope not Stanley!

 Comment Written 12-Sep-2012


reply by the author on 13-Sep-2012
    Thank you for reading my chapter, Crystal. I really appreciate your generous review and interest in the story. Warmest regards, Bev
Comment from fictionwriter
Excellent
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Love the descriptions in this piece of writing. It really brings the reader into the story, and lets them feel the emotions. Well done

 Comment Written 12-Sep-2012


reply by the author on 12-Sep-2012
    Thank you so much, Joy. I really appreciate this awesome review!
    Xxx Bev
Comment from vfbryant
Excellent
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i haven't kept up, but I have read some of you work before, and you write like a natural. Your use of detail ('and while the sheriff laced up his boots'), realistic dialogue, and fast paced action make this another good chapter. Thanks for listing the characters at the bottom!

 Comment Written 12-Sep-2012


reply by the author on 12-Sep-2012
    Thank you for your wonderful review, vf. I really appreciate you choosing to read my chapter and your words of encouragement. Warmest regards, Bev
Comment from Gungalo
Excellent
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Oh I hope it's not a hear attack. Man after all he went thought all day he surely doesn't deserve this now. Oh I hope they hurry and open that door.

 Comment Written 12-Sep-2012


reply by the author on 12-Sep-2012
    Hi, Gungalo. Thanks for choosing to read the chapter and for your generous review! I appreciate it. Warm regards, Bev
reply by Gungalo on 12-Sep-2012
    Smile Bev!!
reply by the author on 12-Sep-2012
    I just did! Thanks, G. Xx Bev
reply by Gungalo on 12-Sep-2012
    Smile.
Comment from dmt1967
Excellent
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This is a nice book if this chapter is anything to go by very well written and I liked the ending can't wait to see if they reached him in time thank you for sharing

 Comment Written 12-Sep-2012


reply by the author on 12-Sep-2012
    Hi, dmt. Thank you much for choosing to read my chapter. I appreciate the generous review and words of encouragement. Warm regards, Bev
Comment from Showboat
Excellent
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Oh Bev, what a wonderful chapter so poignant and filled with emotion.

Poor Stanley ... His throat ached to release a painful knot of tears, but Stanley would not allow it. They were the precursor to the knowledge Debra was utterly gone from his life -- a fact he would not accept.

Great job, carry on!

Hugs,
Gayle

 Comment Written 12-Sep-2012


reply by the author on 12-Sep-2012
    Gayle, thank you so much for this wonderful review. I really appreciate your kind words of encouragement and support. Hugs, Bev
Comment from Scribbler67
Excellent
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How I wish I'd read this from the beginning, but thanks to your flowing style and lucid writing I found it easy to pick up and follow. I have reviewed a couple of previous chapters and I am no less impressed with this one.
Very atmospheric, good clear and natural dialogue, believable characters and all in all a darned good read.

 Comment Written 12-Sep-2012


reply by the author on 12-Sep-2012
    Thank you so much, Scribbler. I really appreciate this awesome reviews and your kind words of encouragement. Thanks for choosing to read! Warmest regards, Bev
Comment from barkingdog
Excellent
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The scene of Oleson on the phone with Tanner was priceless. I just wanted to prod Tanner along and when Oleson said "Frank--" That was perfect.
The entire attitude came across perfectly.

Thought colliding like a free-way pile up(nice metaphor!)

The things Stanley feels and does to avoid admitting to himself that Deborah is dead is what we all feel. The denial the distractions(planting a, pill to sleep): hugging his knees 'keening like a stricken animal'(marvelous description.)

Heart attack- the onset and its final strike(well done) Do the police make it in time.

Truly deserving of a six. Hopefully, next time!

 Comment Written 12-Sep-2012


reply by the author on 12-Sep-2012
    Hi, Ellen. Thank you so much for this wonderfully encouraging review. You know how much I respect your fiction writing ability, so your words are golden are far as I'm concerned. And thanks for the wish for a six. Hugs, Bev
reply by barkingdog on 12-Sep-2012
    Thank you, Bev.:)
Comment from Cornelius2000
Excellent
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This is a very "strong" chapter, with lots of motion. Your dialogue writing comes across as natural and believable, as if you might have experience working in a sheriff's office. The story moves forward at a good pace, and you've created some interesting characters. Well done.

 Comment Written 12-Sep-2012


reply by the author on 12-Sep-2012
    Thanks so much, C! I really appreciate this generous and encouraging review. Thank you much for stopping by! Warm regards, Bev
Comment from Patrick G Cox
Excellent
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Hi writingfundimension,

Hmm, I think the sheriff may be too late, but perhaps Stanley's been poisoned rather than tranquilised.

Good chapter, the tension in the priests house is well presented, there is definitely some unpleasant presence there.

Patrick

 Comment Written 12-Sep-2012


reply by the author on 12-Sep-2012
    Hi, Patrick. Thanks so much for your great review. I sure appreciate your support and great insights. Warmest regards, Bev