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Viewing comments for Chapter 4 "Cavalry in Straw Hats (Rachelle)"Two very real women in not so real situation.
28 total reviews
Comment from Wayne Fowler
This is not the way I imagined (alternating chapters). I like this format better. I don't remember the author (shame on me) or the title, but I recall reading a book about a day's events as seen by a variety of woods critters who shared a small meadow.
Your project is fun. Great idea.
reply by the author on 29-Jun-2024
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This is not the way I imagined (alternating chapters). I like this format better. I don't remember the author (shame on me) or the title, but I recall reading a book about a day's events as seen by a variety of woods critters who shared a small meadow.
Your project is fun. Great idea.
Comment Written 29-Jun-2024
reply by the author on 29-Jun-2024
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Thanks, Wayne! And we are having the BEST time writing it, too! Totally enjoyable project!
Comment from lyenochka
As always, your humor is so entertaining as are your metaphors and similes as in "like a child whose cat's just been run over by a dump truck." It's good that the Almighty sent the "cavalry" with a brood of Biblically named kids!
reply by the author on 29-Jun-2024
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As always, your humor is so entertaining as are your metaphors and similes as in "like a child whose cat's just been run over by a dump truck." It's good that the Almighty sent the "cavalry" with a brood of Biblically named kids!
Comment Written 29-Jun-2024
reply by the author on 29-Jun-2024
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Yes! We're bound to be in very good hands now! Thanks for the validating review, Helen. Always a delight to receive a review from you. xo
Comment from BethShelby
You two writers are doing a wonderful job of co-writing this adventure. Don't let Gretchen turn it into one of her horror tales she writes so vividly. I love visiting Amish Country. I been the the ones through the ones in Pennsylvania but we have a commuinty of them here near me in Tennessee. They sell wonderful produce and are interesting to talk to. My cousin and I went there often to try and take picture without being seen. I have some good ones. I'm looking forward to reading the next installment from both of you.
reply by the author on 29-Jun-2024
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You two writers are doing a wonderful job of co-writing this adventure. Don't let Gretchen turn it into one of her horror tales she writes so vividly. I love visiting Amish Country. I been the the ones through the ones in Pennsylvania but we have a commuinty of them here near me in Tennessee. They sell wonderful produce and are interesting to talk to. My cousin and I went there often to try and take picture without being seen. I have some good ones. I'm looking forward to reading the next installment from both of you.
Comment Written 29-Jun-2024
reply by the author on 29-Jun-2024
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Thank you, Beth, for tge enthusiasm and positive reinforcement! We are having a riot with it!
Comment from judiverse
This is great fun. I truly enjoyed. Just wondering how you're all going to ride in that buggy. I have doubts about them making it to the conference. Love the leopard look and how it seems out of place in this situation. As a thought, the Amish may be closer to phones than we English realize. I come from Parke County, Indiana, and they have a sizeable Amish population now. I understand there are phones at the schools. It's funny that it was the Amish who came to the rescue. Love the remark about the Cavalry coming and he response about them having horses. What a fun, imaginative story. judi
reply by the author on 29-Jun-2024
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This is great fun. I truly enjoyed. Just wondering how you're all going to ride in that buggy. I have doubts about them making it to the conference. Love the leopard look and how it seems out of place in this situation. As a thought, the Amish may be closer to phones than we English realize. I come from Parke County, Indiana, and they have a sizeable Amish population now. I understand there are phones at the schools. It's funny that it was the Amish who came to the rescue. Love the remark about the Cavalry coming and he response about them having horses. What a fun, imaginative story. judi
Comment Written 29-Jun-2024
reply by the author on 29-Jun-2024
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It's two buggies, Judi, and they did mention the two places where there are phones and why they're not available at the moment.
I'm glad you're enjoying our tale. We're loving writing it! xoxox
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It is a joy to read. I wish I could approach everything I read with as much interest as I've had in reading this. Some people who post twice a day are just too repetitious. Yours is fresh material. judi
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Oh, honestly! How did I get so lucky to get a FS friend like you? Thank you for these warm and affirming words. Xoxo
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You really have me hooked on this story. I hope they eventually make it to that FanStory conference. I'll be there vicariously! judi
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Hahaha! You'll have to stay tuned.
Comment from Cindy Decker 3
Rachelle, your take of being stuck in Amish Country is amusing (to the reader, not to you and Gretchen.
I liked your story. (I got my current dog from an Amish family in Ohio. She's the best pup ever!)
They're basically good people who work hard without all the amenities we have.
There is a community of Amish people nearby my apartment.
I like your story, but have one question: are the A's throughout your work intentional? If not just a small correction will make your story an excellent one.
Good luck,
Cindy
reply by the author on 29-Jun-2024
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Rachelle, your take of being stuck in Amish Country is amusing (to the reader, not to you and Gretchen.
I liked your story. (I got my current dog from an Amish family in Ohio. She's the best pup ever!)
They're basically good people who work hard without all the amenities we have.
There is a community of Amish people nearby my apartment.
I like your story, but have one question: are the A's throughout your work intentional? If not just a small correction will make your story an excellent one.
Good luck,
Cindy
Comment Written 29-Jun-2024
reply by the author on 29-Jun-2024
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Thanks for catching those weird A symbols. I forgot to change them when I re-formatted from "Basic." I think they're gone now.
We bought our previous dog from Menonites near here. Where do you live, Cindy?
Comment from GWHARGIS
Love this, Rachelle. You nailed the scene. The slash of lightning was dramatic and would have made the women make a hasty decision about getting into the buggy. In one spot you refer to Helene as Sarah. Amish children call their fathers Daede and their mothers Maam. Learning more and more. Gretchen
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reply by the author on 29-Jun-2024
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Love this, Rachelle. You nailed the scene. The slash of lightning was dramatic and would have made the women make a hasty decision about getting into the buggy. In one spot you refer to Helene as Sarah. Amish children call their fathers Daede and their mothers Maam. Learning more and more. Gretchen
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The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 29-Jun-2024
reply by the author on 29-Jun-2024
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Thanks, GW; I'll get right on that. And I did know about those names because of the Linda Castillo book series I read. I didn't know how Daede was spelled though. (Oddly, it's pronounced "Dot.")
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I've been googling amish info. Lol.
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You might love the series. I just happened upon it when I was looking for audiobooks to listen to in the car between lessons. I read the entire series - like, maybe nine novels? Very interesting.
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I will definitely check them out.
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Now you sound like a Librarian!! HAAA!! Like what I did there, Gretchen?...
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Lmao. I do see what you did.
Comment from Liliana Tricks
You've truly woven a vibrant and captivating piece. Your adept writing effortlessly merges humor and intrigue, creating a compelling narrative that leaving eager anticipation in this intriguing encounter. Your ability to engage and entertain shines through in this piece, making it a delightful read.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 29-Jun-2024
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You've truly woven a vibrant and captivating piece. Your adept writing effortlessly merges humor and intrigue, creating a compelling narrative that leaving eager anticipation in this intriguing encounter. Your ability to engage and entertain shines through in this piece, making it a delightful read.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 29-Jun-2024
reply by the author on 29-Jun-2024
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Wow!! What a wonderful review!! Thank you very, very much for all the encouragement!! So very appreciated! xo
Comment from Sugarray77
Great job on the hilarity of this piece, Rachelle. You are doing a great job keeping it funny and describing the situations with accuracy and humor. Fun read, my friend.
Melissa
reply by the author on 29-Jun-2024
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Great job on the hilarity of this piece, Rachelle. You are doing a great job keeping it funny and describing the situations with accuracy and humor. Fun read, my friend.
Melissa
Comment Written 29-Jun-2024
reply by the author on 29-Jun-2024
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Thanks! Have you checked out Gretchen's version, too? (GW Hargis) She's hysterical beyond words. xo