Comment from Earthwriter

Excellent

Wow that is a very profound piece that gives us pause to ponder none of us know what we are capable of unless we are in their shoes

 Comment Written 28-Dec-2015

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reply by the author on 28-Dec-2015

I'm delighted you think so. Thank you kindly, mikey

Comment from Mel Inc

Excellent

I like your lyrics but I did wonder how it would go with music so it was great to have your recording as a reference. I have nothing to suggest about your writing, it is very good but I was left wondering how the thief was killed...? Though I do get that the 'how' doesn't matter as much as 'why'; ie the King's greed and selfishness. Good luck with your music and writing, I wish you well. Melanie

 Comment Written 28-Dec-2015

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reply by the author on 28-Dec-2015

The thief was shot. "A flash of light, a thundering" is my interpretation of a gun firing. :))
Wow. I'm delighted you enjoyed this. The recording is not the best I know. Thank you for overlooking the noise!
Thank you so much, mikey

Comment from Reedblitzerman

Exceptional

Hey Michael, this offering packed an emotional wallop. I liked how you switched between the two stories. I was still able to understand the flow and the logic of why you did it. "The jester spoke of equity, secure inside the fort" excellent line, though it wasn't the only one that was a standout. You've got a great ear and I sense some strong emotion in your writing. Keep going, you're really good.

 Comment Written 28-Dec-2015

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reply by the author on 28-Dec-2015

I'm so glad to hear you were able to follow the two different parts and it didn't throw you off. That is most encouraging. I doubt I'll stop smiling all day. Thanks for all the stars and the great insights and encouragement. mikey

Comment from writeapoem

Excellent

The lyrics are interesting and the question real are you willing to steal to feed your kids. The verse depicting the kings kingdom enhances the inspiration. All the best and God Bless

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 Comment Written 28-Dec-2015

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reply by the author on 28-Dec-2015

Great to hear you get this perfectly. I couldn't be more encouraged. Thank you very much. Blessings, mikey

Comment from giraffmang

Excellent

Hi Mikey,

I really like this and it is an interesting supposition. What lengths would you go to, and what are the risks involved. is it worth it?

Couple of little queries -

thrundering? is this intentional? or is it thundering?

vaudevilian - I think it has two 'l's' - vaudevillian

Curious as to why you used the question mark in the first line but discontinued this in the rest of the piece.

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 Comment Written 28-Dec-2015

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reply by the author on 28-Dec-2015

I'll fix those, I think I need better glasses. :))
No reason for the question mark, I removed it. Yeah, either punctuate it or don't right? It kind of stuck out so glad you noticed. Thanks for the input and tips. Always appreciate improvements that can be made. mikey