Reviews from

My Own Hell

It's where I live daily...

70 total reviews 
Comment from amada
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Great talent to cook this not too nice poem just out of the blue. Blue and nice and talentcould cook up something dreamy...that's me. Such a God given talent!

 Comment Written 30-Jun-2014

reply by the author on 30-Jun-2014
    Thank you, amada. I don't know how "God-given" it is, but it's how I write, where my passions lie. My pastor at church frequently questions my motives at times himself. However, he knows my faith is strong. I can only trust that God know that as well.

    I appreciate your review, my friend.
reply by amada on 01-Jul-2014
    Thank you, my friend. God has knows and that's all it matters. Who I am to question it: Great lesson.
reply by the author on 01-Jul-2014
    Sure thing, no problem, amada.
Comment from MisinformedPoet
Excellent
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Seriously disturbing words set off by the most disturbing pictures. I think the assonance and consonance in the first two lines of each stanza works so well to give a sense of madness to this poem of expiry.

 Comment Written 30-Jun-2014

reply by the author on 30-Jun-2014
    I copied the rhythm from Poe's classic poem, The Raven. I wrote the entire thing in about five minutes. It's truly how I feel most days, except for the killing. A bit of embellishment there, for artistic sake.

    Thanks for your too kind review.
Comment from Writingfundimension
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

This is surely what the heart of a murderer is like, Dean. My gosh, your use of very strong descriptives makes this a truly horrifying read. Which I'm sure makes you very happy to read. Great job, my friend.

:) Bev

 Comment Written 30-Jun-2014

reply by the author on 30-Jun-2014
    Thanks, Bev, but actually this is very telling of how I feel most time, with the exception of the killing, of course. There was a bit of embellishment there. Bouts with severe depression and sleeplessness are getting the best of me, I fear. However, I'll keep plugging away, and praying, and hoping for the best.

    Thanks for your review.
reply by Writingfundimension on 30-Jun-2014
    Dean, have you ever heard of EFT? It's a very powerful technique for dealing with PTSS. The technical name for it is emotional freedom technique. I suggest you try it - it's done wonders for my own bouts of generalized anxiety and long-term OCD.

    Anyway, you are very welcome. I'm sorry you're having such difficulty right now.

    Warm regards, Bev
reply by the author on 30-Jun-2014
    No worries, Bev. I'll get through it. If it weren't for my writing, I just don't know. Then, last Sunday, I found out my father's been diagnosed with Alzheimer's Disease. I just wonder when it will ever end, but I suspect I know.

    I'll look into EFT, thanks for the tip.
reply by Writingfundimension on 30-Jun-2014
    That's a tough one, Dean. I'm sure you are anticipating what your father's future will be like knowing what a superb imagination you have. I agree about the writing as good therapy. It is for me, too.

    :) Bev
reply by the author on 30-Jun-2014
    Yes, my dad's mind has always been so keen, and I can't imagine seeing him like my Uncle Roger, my mom's husband, is right now with the latter stages of the disease. He's curled up into a fetal position now, and needs help doing the simplest of tasks. He was always so funny, the life of every family gathering, my Uncle Roger. I simply can't comprehend my father like that. It's very disheartening.
reply by Writingfundimension on 30-Jun-2014
    I will add your father to my prayer list, Dean. And I am sorry for you having to deal with this right now. Big Hug, Bev
reply by the author on 30-Jun-2014
    That's for simply listening, Bev. I appreciate it.
reply by Writingfundimension on 30-Jun-2014
    You're welcome, Dean. Any time. :)
reply by the author on 30-Jun-2014
    :}
Comment from Barb Hensongispsaca
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Maybe out of a last minute but you have to realize this is a contuining turmoil to a lot of lost souls.
Been there a few times myself.
Lost in my world

 Comment Written 30-Jun-2014

reply by the author on 30-Jun-2014
    I simply wrote what I felt, Barb. Unfortunately lately, I feel this way far too often. Well, the killing is an embellishment, obviously, but the rest is pretty spot-on.

    Thanks for your kind review and most generous rating.
Comment from GracieAnn
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Dean, this is definitely creepy in message. The use of consonance and assonance is well executed, with an Edgar Allen Poe feel. Very creative. :0 GracieAnn

 Comment Written 30-Jun-2014

reply by the author on 30-Jun-2014
    Thanks, GracieAnn, and funny that you should mention Poe.There is a reason he popped into your mind as you read this. I copied his beats and rhythm from his chilling poem, The Raven, to an extent.

    I'm glad you enjoyed my five minute foray into darkness. That's how long it took me to write it.

    Thanks so much again.

    ~DK~
Comment from Louise Michelle
Excellent
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Oh, Dean, what am I going to do with you, lol. This was a treat to read because the meter made it so bouncy. I love how the protagonist makes no apologies. He simply states the facts of his being. Yet, he's almost asking for sympathy or, more precisely, understanding. Hugs, Lou

 Comment Written 30-Jun-2014

reply by the author on 30-Jun-2014
    What are you going to do with me? H-m-m-m-m, well...you could always bury me in your back yard. I'm sure I'd be of more use as compost than I am now, LOL.

    Thanks for your assessment, Lou. He's about to eat a bullet as well.
reply by Louise Michelle on 30-Jun-2014
    LOL - Compost, huh? You'd probably produce demon veggies that are guaranteed to choke anyone chomping on them.
reply by the author on 30-Jun-2014
    You're probably right, but I make a mean beef stew, hee-hee...
Comment from elchupakabra
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

I don't think came out of the blue, bud, I think it definitely came out of the red. You know, that dangerous place...

Haha, sorry buddy, just messing around. I really like the assonances in this piece, it made for a killer flow, pun intended. Great work overall, thanks for sharing.

 Comment Written 30-Jun-2014

reply by the author on 30-Jun-2014
    I wrote it in less than five minutes, 'Chup. Thanks.
Comment from country ranch writer
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Fine kettle of human fish you cooked up put b-q-sauce on the people like the did in fried green tomatoes and they will never know the difference ha-ha tastes just like chicken they say haha

 Comment Written 30-Jun-2014

reply by the author on 01-Jul-2014
    Thanks! I loves me some country, LOL...
reply by country ranch writer on 01-Jul-2014
    AWE
reply by the author on 01-Jul-2014
    Good morning, darlin'!
reply by country ranch writer on 01-Jul-2014
    HELLO SWEETIE PIE
reply by country ranch writer on 01-Jul-2014
    WHAT ARE YOU UP TO THIS MORNING? I COULDN'T SLEEP SO I GOT UP WILL TAKE A NAP LATTER HEHE.WHAT YOU ALL DOING ON THE FOURTH OF JULY? KIDS WON'T BE COMING UP, THEY CAME ON SATURDAY FOR DADS 70TH BIRTHDAY PARTY. HE WAS SURPRISED THEY GAVE HIM A PARTY. THEY ALL ALL GOING TO WATCH FIREWORKS AND LIGHT SOME OFF LATTER THAT NIGHT. WILL BE A NOISY ON FOR SURE HOPE IT IS QUIET HERE SO IT DON'T SCARE THE NEIGHBORS HORSES
reply by the author on 01-Jul-2014
    That sounds wonderful, country. We aren't doing anything special on the fourth, my wife has to work. But on the fifth, her cousin is throwing a huge cookout, complete with a spectacular fireworks show at dark. He has it every year, and the whole family and all of their friends really look froward to it. It's one heck of a shindig, so we are all going to that.
reply by country ranch writer on 01-Jul-2014
    SOUNDS LIKE FUN. I WILL TAKE A DOGGIE BAG OF LEFTOVER FOOD WITH ICE TEA TO DRINK OR A DIET SODA, HOW IS MY BARREL RACER SHE DOING LIKE I SUGGEST AND WATCHING THOSE TAKES AHE NEEDS TO GET YOU TO TAPE HER RIDES SO SHE KNOWS WHERE TO CORRECT HER MISTAKES. WELL ENOUGH PREACHING FROM THE CHIOR HEHE. DO NOT OVERDUE IT YOU HERE. YOU GET SICK I WON'T KNOW IF YOU ARE OKAY. GOD BLESS BE SAFE MY FRIEND
reply by the author on 01-Jul-2014
    She's as chipper as ever, my friend. I will holler at you later!

    Dean~
reply by country ranch writer on 01-Jul-2014
    BE GOOD BE SAFE YOU HEAR AND HUG YOUR FAMILY TODAY!
reply by the author on 01-Jul-2014
    Always :}
Comment from Tomes Johnston
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

This is yet another excellent piece of writing that the author has created with this post. This is yet another roller-coaster ride through the darkest depths of the mind and soul.

 Comment Written 30-Jun-2014

reply by the author on 30-Jun-2014
    Yep, it sure was, Tomes. For you too, huh?

    Nice!
reply by Tomes Johnston on 01-Jul-2014
    Yes indeed, for me too.
Comment from CALLAHANMR
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Hi Dean:)
This poem may be intended as the essence of your very own private hell, but if this nonsensical sycophancy of rhyming words went racing through my head, I'm almost certain I would be right there with you in a very private hell fron which even the devil would flee. So why do I like it? Because it show brilliant creativity and wordsmanship.

Roger

 Comment Written 30-Jun-2014

reply by the author on 01-Jul-2014
    Thank you very much, Roger. I'm glad you did, my friend, and I'm very grateful for the six stars.