A Serendipitous Meeting
Viewing comments for Chapter 5 "Serendipitous Chapter 2 B"Traditional in a modern world..
34 total reviews
Comment from DeboraDyess
Hi, Barbara~
You're moving your story right along. :) I cannot imagine how uncomfortable some of this is for her.
A couple of things:~ There's one place with three or four lines of dialogue with no speech tags. I hate them, too but I was confused for a minute about who was saying what. YOu might add something like 'she shifted uncomfortably in her chair' or 'he grinned at her reaction' to give some clues.
~ Rebekah repeats 'I'll let Amber know you are calling'. On purpose? If so no worries. But I did want to point it out to you. :)
Blessings!
Deb
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2025
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Hi, Barbara~
You're moving your story right along. :) I cannot imagine how uncomfortable some of this is for her.
A couple of things:~ There's one place with three or four lines of dialogue with no speech tags. I hate them, too but I was confused for a minute about who was saying what. YOu might add something like 'she shifted uncomfortably in her chair' or 'he grinned at her reaction' to give some clues.
~ Rebekah repeats 'I'll let Amber know you are calling'. On purpose? If so no worries. But I did want to point it out to you. :)
Blessings!
Deb
Comment Written 04-Mar-2025
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2025
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I'll recheck those areas. My editor has gotten on me for using too many speech tags, so I've tried not to use so many. I may have gone overboard. Thank you for mentioning that.
Comment from Gypsy Blue Rose
I appreciate you adding a list of characters, it makes it easier to follow.
Another romantic book. You are so talented and expert author.
You develop the characters and plot well.
Well done
reply by the author on 04-Mar-2025
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I appreciate you adding a list of characters, it makes it easier to follow.
Another romantic book. You are so talented and expert author.
You develop the characters and plot well.
Well done
Comment Written 04-Mar-2025
reply by the author on 04-Mar-2025
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Thank you for the encouragement. I appreciate the review.
Comment from Arabellesmom
Hi there, I'm Tamara (Arabellesmom) and I'm kind of new to fan story. What a loving wonderful community. Nice to come across your writing as you are a very amazing writer ;)
reply by the author on 04-Mar-2025
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Hi there, I'm Tamara (Arabellesmom) and I'm kind of new to fan story. What a loving wonderful community. Nice to come across your writing as you are a very amazing writer ;)
Comment Written 04-Mar-2025
reply by the author on 04-Mar-2025
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WELCOME!!! Thank you for dropping by and leaving this kind review. I do hope you enjoy our site and get a lot from it.
Comment from Karen Cherry
It is hard to believe in this day and age people can still be so naive about basic things. You write well. Any updates on your books? I am going through old stuff I wrote and editing heavily! Have a good week. Karen
reply by the author on 04-Mar-2025
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It is hard to believe in this day and age people can still be so naive about basic things. You write well. Any updates on your books? I am going through old stuff I wrote and editing heavily! Have a good week. Karen
Comment Written 04-Mar-2025
reply by the author on 04-Mar-2025
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I just received the Noah and Sami story, well, the first three edited chapters to approve or not approve. I approved them. Yes, there are certain religions in today's world that still hang onto their old values. Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from judiverse
Richard is a real jerk. Don't blame Rebeka for not wanting anything to do with him. Hopefully the weather will clear up so Rebeka can see the OB/GYN and take care of her other business. How is she going to handle her pregnancy given that she is an established author and has a following. Her assistant (not assistance) sounds like fun. Great job with handling the characters--a few at a time, and they are well presented. I just finished reading "Lincoln Highway." So many characters, and they each had their own story. It was repetitious. Sorry I didn't get to your chapter sooner. Sometimes I get into a snit over lack of reviews and don't feel like reviewing. Very impressive work with this so far. judi
reply by the author on 04-Mar-2025
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Richard is a real jerk. Don't blame Rebeka for not wanting anything to do with him. Hopefully the weather will clear up so Rebeka can see the OB/GYN and take care of her other business. How is she going to handle her pregnancy given that she is an established author and has a following. Her assistant (not assistance) sounds like fun. Great job with handling the characters--a few at a time, and they are well presented. I just finished reading "Lincoln Highway." So many characters, and they each had their own story. It was repetitious. Sorry I didn't get to your chapter sooner. Sometimes I get into a snit over lack of reviews and don't feel like reviewing. Very impressive work with this so far. judi
Comment Written 03-Mar-2025
reply by the author on 04-Mar-2025
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I made that correction. I'll check and see if I forgot to save. I do understand. I appreciate your review.
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You're welcome. I sometimes forget to save things, too. judi
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Does that mean we're getting old or just have a lot on our plates???
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I think my mind just wanders from one thing to another before I get the first thing resolved. judi
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I have a problem with that myself.
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Oh, yes. I'm always starting to do one thing and then drift off to something else. judi
Comment from Wayne Fowler
Precariously close to actually 'touching' one another. Despite Rebeka's not taking Ty's hand, she let him touch the top of her pubic bone. that almost counts. (smiley face here)
Nicely done.
reply by the author on 04-Mar-2025
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Precariously close to actually 'touching' one another. Despite Rebeka's not taking Ty's hand, she let him touch the top of her pubic bone. that almost counts. (smiley face here)
Nicely done.
Comment Written 03-Mar-2025
reply by the author on 04-Mar-2025
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LOL Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from Jacob1395
I loved the moment when Rebekah heard her baby's heartbeat for the first time and it was clear to see the joy she felt during this moment. Another excellent, well written chapter, Barbara. I really enjoyed it.
reply by the author on 04-Mar-2025
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I loved the moment when Rebekah heard her baby's heartbeat for the first time and it was clear to see the joy she felt during this moment. Another excellent, well written chapter, Barbara. I really enjoyed it.
Comment Written 03-Mar-2025
reply by the author on 04-Mar-2025
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Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from lyenochka
Sounds like Tyler has all the right solutions and is providing both proper maternity care as well as legal help! You can't do this on your own anywhere in the US today. It helps to know someone!
And how embarrassing for Tyler to overhear the conversation. But it sounds like it will be alright and that was a clever way to give us background info on Tyler.
reply by the author on 03-Mar-2025
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Sounds like Tyler has all the right solutions and is providing both proper maternity care as well as legal help! You can't do this on your own anywhere in the US today. It helps to know someone!
And how embarrassing for Tyler to overhear the conversation. But it sounds like it will be alright and that was a clever way to give us background info on Tyler.
Comment Written 03-Mar-2025
reply by the author on 03-Mar-2025
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Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from Teri7
This is another really great chapter you have penned. It has taken me a while to read it. You used great descriptive words and great dialogue. Looking forward to the next chapter. love and blessings, Teri
reply by the author on 03-Mar-2025
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This is another really great chapter you have penned. It has taken me a while to read it. You used great descriptive words and great dialogue. Looking forward to the next chapter. love and blessings, Teri
Comment Written 03-Mar-2025
reply by the author on 03-Mar-2025
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Thank you for the encouragement and the kind review.
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you are so welcome!
Comment from Sanku
This is getting interesting .I hope the lawyer would succeed in catching that agent and recover some money.. I feel sad for Rebeka because this is a double tragedy , she is pregnant and lost all money too...
reply by the author on 03-Mar-2025
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This is getting interesting .I hope the lawyer would succeed in catching that agent and recover some money.. I feel sad for Rebeka because this is a double tragedy , she is pregnant and lost all money too...
Comment Written 03-Mar-2025
reply by the author on 03-Mar-2025
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Thank you for the kind review and understanding.
