Willing Hearts
Viewing comments for Chapter 1 "Willing Hearts Chapter 1"Solve a crime and fall in love at the same time?
39 total reviews
Comment from Tyler Withrow
That was both gripping and deeply disturbing. When I saw the picture, I was expecting something unsettling and you didn't disappoint. It is certainly a set up for a much larger story.
reply by the author on 26-Jan-2024
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That was both gripping and deeply disturbing. When I saw the picture, I was expecting something unsettling and you didn't disappoint. It is certainly a set up for a much larger story.
Comment Written 26-Jan-2024
reply by the author on 26-Jan-2024
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Thank you for your support and the kind review. I am continuing with this story.
Comment from Wayne Fowler
Nicely written.
You have the concept of a good story: action, drama, realism... And the start of a mystery: who is Noah and his group?
Good luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 26-Jan-2024
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Nicely written.
You have the concept of a good story: action, drama, realism... And the start of a mystery: who is Noah and his group?
Good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 26-Jan-2024
reply by the author on 26-Jan-2024
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We'll find out soon enough who Noah and his group are. Before long, well in a few weeks, it will all become clear. Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from Brett Matthew West
Interesting, and the mom is right both dangerous to Sami and Myra will not be the same. So real to life, unfortunately.
I have a Great Dane/Mastiff. His name is Charlie. Danes make good pets.
Sounds like a story to follow especially since entering the story in the first chapter.
reply by the author on 26-Jan-2024
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Interesting, and the mom is right both dangerous to Sami and Myra will not be the same. So real to life, unfortunately.
I have a Great Dane/Mastiff. His name is Charlie. Danes make good pets.
Sounds like a story to follow especially since entering the story in the first chapter.
Comment Written 26-Jan-2024
reply by the author on 26-Jan-2024
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I grew up with a Great Dane, Duke. Great dogs!!! I can promise Jasper will often steal the scene. LOL Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from BethShelby
This is a well written first chapter of subject we all should probably be aware of. It is horrible that such a think could happen and for most of these girls there is not likely someone as concerned as Sami. I'll look forward to reading more.
reply by the author on 26-Jan-2024
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This is a well written first chapter of subject we all should probably be aware of. It is horrible that such a think could happen and for most of these girls there is not likely someone as concerned as Sami. I'll look forward to reading more.
Comment Written 26-Jan-2024
reply by the author on 26-Jan-2024
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Thank you for the kind review. Yes, it is awful and happens way too often.
Comment from lyenochka
This will be a nail-biter of a book, Barbara. I think it's a great idea for a book because the whole kidnapping for the sex trafficking industry is a huge topic these days. Best wishes in the contest!
I found it a little hard at times to distinguish between the regular conversation and those who are doing the surveillance on Sami.
I have a question as to the last name you chose for Myra, " Myra Rodriquez". Is that normal? Typically, the common name is Rodriguez with a G not a "Q".
reply by the author on 26-Jan-2024
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This will be a nail-biter of a book, Barbara. I think it's a great idea for a book because the whole kidnapping for the sex trafficking industry is a huge topic these days. Best wishes in the contest!
I found it a little hard at times to distinguish between the regular conversation and those who are doing the surveillance on Sami.
I have a question as to the last name you chose for Myra, " Myra Rodriquez". Is that normal? Typically, the common name is Rodriguez with a G not a "Q".
Comment Written 26-Jan-2024
reply by the author on 26-Jan-2024
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Here in Texas, it can be written both ways. I will consider changing it for the rest of the US. Thank you for pointing it out.
Comment from Carol Hillebrenner
This is a great first chapter to a book. It has all the essentials: action, mystery, a great lead character, men who at first sounded like they were the bad guys but quickly prove they are the good guys, and even a sweet waitress who is working with the good guys. I'm not to crazy about the foster parents, mostly because my granddaughter's job is finding foster families for children, but they do make sense as the father figure is the real bad guy of the pair. You have a really good chance of winning the contest with this chapter.
reply by the author on 26-Jan-2024
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This is a great first chapter to a book. It has all the essentials: action, mystery, a great lead character, men who at first sounded like they were the bad guys but quickly prove they are the good guys, and even a sweet waitress who is working with the good guys. I'm not to crazy about the foster parents, mostly because my granddaughter's job is finding foster families for children, but they do make sense as the father figure is the real bad guy of the pair. You have a really good chance of winning the contest with this chapter.
Comment Written 26-Jan-2024
reply by the author on 26-Jan-2024
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Thank you for the kind review. Foster parents are like anything else, can be good or bad.
Comment from John Ciarmello
This is a great first chapter of this story. I'm completely intrigued and want to hear the next chapter. I knew you didn't enter the contest and didn't know this was an entry until I read it in the notes at the end.
I love it! I wish you much success with the contest, Barbara! Best, JohnC
reply by the author on 26-Jan-2024
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This is a great first chapter of this story. I'm completely intrigued and want to hear the next chapter. I knew you didn't enter the contest and didn't know this was an entry until I read it in the notes at the end.
I love it! I wish you much success with the contest, Barbara! Best, JohnC
Comment Written 25-Jan-2024
reply by the author on 26-Jan-2024
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Thank you for the kind review and the support.
Comment from lancellot
Hmm, the structural writing and editing are very good. Up to your normal high standards, and it is a full/real chapter. I wish you good luck in the contest.
notes:
Across the street Noah Taylor. watched.
-Across the street Noah Taylor watched.
reply by the author on 26-Jan-2024
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Hmm, the structural writing and editing are very good. Up to your normal high standards, and it is a full/real chapter. I wish you good luck in the contest.
notes:
Across the street Noah Taylor. watched.
-Across the street Noah Taylor watched.
Comment Written 25-Jan-2024
reply by the author on 26-Jan-2024
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Thank you for catching that wayward period. I have deleted. I appreciate the help.
Comment from Paul McFarland
This looks like a good one, Barb. You are dealing with a topic that is a big problem here in the states- especially in the bigger cities. Good luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 25-Jan-2024
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This looks like a good one, Barb. You are dealing with a topic that is a big problem here in the states- especially in the bigger cities. Good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 25-Jan-2024
reply by the author on 25-Jan-2024
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Thank you for the kind review and the support.
Comment from Jacob1395
This is an exciting start to your new novel, Barbara. I could feel the tension and the frustration when the police wouldn't take the call about the kidnapped girls seriously. You've introduced us to an interesting new cast of characters, I can't wait to read more.
reply by the author on 25-Jan-2024
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This is an exciting start to your new novel, Barbara. I could feel the tension and the frustration when the police wouldn't take the call about the kidnapped girls seriously. You've introduced us to an interesting new cast of characters, I can't wait to read more.
Comment Written 25-Jan-2024
reply by the author on 25-Jan-2024
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Thank you for the kind review and the support.