Fading Marriage
a senyru contest entry9 total reviews
Comment from Bill Schott
This is a senryu that speaks of our humanity by showing us the way we use our children to win arguments, leverage decisions, and filter our hate and joy.
reply by the author on 12-May-2014
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This is a senryu that speaks of our humanity by showing us the way we use our children to win arguments, leverage decisions, and filter our hate and joy.
Comment Written 12-May-2014
reply by the author on 12-May-2014
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Thank you, Bill, for your insightful review.
Comment from Debra White
Hi :) This is a great entry for the contest. It's sad but true that many marriages feel the strain once children come along as the focus of attention shifts. Very well written and I wish you the best of luck in the booth. Kindest regards, Debra :)
reply by the author on 12-May-2014
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Hi :) This is a great entry for the contest. It's sad but true that many marriages feel the strain once children come along as the focus of attention shifts. Very well written and I wish you the best of luck in the booth. Kindest regards, Debra :)
Comment Written 12-May-2014
reply by the author on 12-May-2014
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Thank you, Debra, for your most insightful review and kind praise.
Comment from Dean Kuch
Sadly, many marriages are kept together by the slender, wearing thread of their children. When the kids fly the nest, those parents are often left with nothing in common, and not much to talk about.
An excellent senryu, and perfectly formatted for this contest.
Good luck to you!
reply by the author on 11-May-2014
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Sadly, many marriages are kept together by the slender, wearing thread of their children. When the kids fly the nest, those parents are often left with nothing in common, and not much to talk about.
An excellent senryu, and perfectly formatted for this contest.
Good luck to you!
Comment Written 11-May-2014
reply by the author on 11-May-2014
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Indeed, you are correct, Dean. Thanks so much for sharing and your best wishes.
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You're very welcome.
Comment from TAB_that's me
Such a true little poem. It is written in perfect senryu form with correct syllable count. Good luck in the contest.
~Teresa~
reply by the author on 11-May-2014
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Such a true little poem. It is written in perfect senryu form with correct syllable count. Good luck in the contest.
~Teresa~
Comment Written 11-May-2014
reply by the author on 11-May-2014
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I am delighted you like this portrait of marriage. Thank you for sharing and your best wishes.
Comment from Smoothiecool
good luck in the contest
your few words and vivid image allows the reader to see and feel the marriage break down as they argue like children
cheers Smoothiecool
reply by the author on 11-May-2014
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good luck in the contest
your few words and vivid image allows the reader to see and feel the marriage break down as they argue like children
cheers Smoothiecool
Comment Written 11-May-2014
reply by the author on 11-May-2014
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Thank you for sharing my poem and your kind review.
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welcome..SC
Comment from zanya
Yes is this the social cancer of our times - our increasing inability to maintain and foster our most intimate and meaningful relationships - well portrayed
reply by the author on 11-May-2014
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Yes is this the social cancer of our times - our increasing inability to maintain and foster our most intimate and meaningful relationships - well portrayed
Comment Written 11-May-2014
reply by the author on 11-May-2014
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I am very pleased you found this senyru meaningful. Thanks for sharing.
Comment from yolieday
Great piece. As someone that going through this, I appreciated the child's voice. All rules on senryu applied. The flow is great. Thank you for sharing.
reply by the author on 11-May-2014
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Great piece. As someone that going through this, I appreciated the child's voice. All rules on senryu applied. The flow is great. Thank you for sharing.
Comment Written 11-May-2014
reply by the author on 11-May-2014
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Thank you so much for your kind praise. So pleased the poem had special meaning for you.
Comment from adewpearl
perfect pairing of artwork and poem, which is in good senryu format
an insightful look at the nature of too many marriages where the couple truly do seem to have nothing left in common except the children they've created together
Brooke
reply by the author on 11-May-2014
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perfect pairing of artwork and poem, which is in good senryu format
an insightful look at the nature of too many marriages where the couple truly do seem to have nothing left in common except the children they've created together
Brooke
Comment Written 11-May-2014
reply by the author on 11-May-2014
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Thank you, Brooke, for this very insightful review. I am delighted you like the pairing of the artwork and poem.
Comment from WordsPoeticallyWorth
A nice piece that I enjoyed reading. Well done. It's hard sometimes to write to a specific structure. Nice picture to accompany it.
Thank you. Love love, Andrew. Bye.
reply by the author on 11-May-2014
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A nice piece that I enjoyed reading. Well done. It's hard sometimes to write to a specific structure. Nice picture to accompany it.
Thank you. Love love, Andrew. Bye.
Comment Written 11-May-2014
reply by the author on 11-May-2014
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So glad you enjoyed. Thanks for reviewing.