Reviews from

The Bard of Bel Air

Viewing comments for Chapter 21 "Meet and Greet at the Blackwell's"
A homeless man sees more than people realize.

15 total reviews 
Comment from Selina Stambi
Excellent
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... The tension rises AND the plot thickens...

A great final line about the snake pit ... SO true!

Well done, Mikey !

Until next time,

Sonali :)



would grab the victim(')s head with both hands and

She has a cool(,) calculated man(ner) about her

Not many wom(e)n will stand up to me like

hell is she doing working as a nanny(?)

wicked witch of Bel Air(,) honey

as though he fantasized (about) something

 Comment Written 08-May-2014

Comment from Tatarka2
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This is a 5 1/2 for me. Just a few SPAGs (spelling), but nothing to worry about. This is moving so fast, and is so intriguing, that I really think you have something important here. Just the right juxtaposition of dialogue and action, and the characters are all clear-cut and interesting in their own right. This chapter is very well-done, I think.

 Comment Written 06-May-2014

Comment from Sankey
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hehe funny and good chapter. Raving on stiff but I love it mate. You got me in ok! Plenty of imagination going rife in here.
Just a small spag.woma(e)n out of there

 Comment Written 06-May-2014

Comment from GracieAnn
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Mikey, great description: Lucy felt like she had walked into a dog-fighting ring, where none of the dogs had noticed each other yet. The humor is laced throughout and makes it interesting. I don't have any suggestions right now, but keep up the good work. :0 GracieAnn

 Comment Written 06-May-2014

Comment from l.raven
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OMG Michael, it's a WWF wrestling match...who's going down first...all are greedy...when they find out they are all going to explode...LOL...next chapter should tell a lot...things will have to start coming together...who who??? liked this Michael...a great write...luff Linda xxoo

 Comment Written 05-May-2014

Comment from ProjectBluebook
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I hate snakes, they are creepy! Only snake I like is a King or Garder snake. King snakes eat poisonous snakes! Now, for the story. Kill 'em all! Let God sort them out. I guess things will change when Jr finds out that Sr is alive! They all got him dead, there are gut-wrenching, already got a will, looks like a cat fight. Cochroaches come out of the woodwork when there is money involved. Sr will probably be happy to see Ruby dancer and Diamond. The wife can taste that money, don't give a hoot if Sr was dead. Sorry for my tardiness, busy today. I got California weather. Ever see Californiafication? David Duchovney. Good one mate. Later days Lion King.

 Comment Written 05-May-2014

Comment from seaglass
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I can't wait for DNA testing. I still say they will find Lilith is a tart and those boys aren't Harpster's. Of course under USA law, any child born to a couple while in matrimony is considered a legal child but in a will situation, it could clear the murky waters.



"So, (Hope) Diamond here is your..." Did you mean for (hope) to be capitalized?

 Comment Written 05-May-2014

Comment from ravenblack
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One suggestion- get the Bard back together with Tenyaya. And who knows, in addition to being a chopper pilot, maybe the bard was a green beret and will kick Winston' s ass.

 Comment Written 05-May-2014


reply by the author on 05-May-2014
    Agree. You mentioned that a while back and it stuck. They are good together. I've been spending a few chapters getting them back in the same area. Hahaha. Yep, he's as bad as Winston and just as crazy!!
Comment from nancy_e_davis
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she is two years older that [than] you. I saw that one little nit.
The situation is getting very tense, dog fight is right and I love what the Bard said at the last. It's a snake pit. Yes it is. LOL Well done. Nancy

 Comment Written 05-May-2014

Comment from Nosha17
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Very smartly written-an intricate plot to be unravelled cleverly, with all the characters competing for the spoils. The action will soon begin, with Lucy in on the kill! Great write, Faye

 Comment Written 05-May-2014