Emerald Isle
Viewing comments for Chapter 2 "The First Course"Invitation to Paradise
8 total reviews
Comment from Ulla
Exactly, Lori, one can only magine what will happen during the second course. I can't wait to see what it will bee. Lol. I'm already busy writing.that chapter. I hope it will be out on Wednesday.
Meanwhile, you've set the scene for a lot of intrigue and deception. Wery well written. Ulla xcx
reply by the author on 17-Mar-2025
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Exactly, Lori, one can only magine what will happen during the second course. I can't wait to see what it will bee. Lol. I'm already busy writing.that chapter. I hope it will be out on Wednesday.
Meanwhile, you've set the scene for a lot of intrigue and deception. Wery well written. Ulla xcx
Comment Written 17-Mar-2025
reply by the author on 17-Mar-2025
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Thanks Ulla for the six stars and positive review! Looking forward to
Wednesday! Lori
Comment from barbara.wilkey
You have a great story line. I enjoyed reading. Please keep an eye out for the action tags.
"Yes, I'm sorry about that. Just an untimely case of butter fingers," trying to down play the whole thing (You have an action tag following dialogue, try --"Yes, I'm sorry about that. Just an untimely case of butter fingers." She tried to downplay the whole thing.)
"Lighten up everybody. Just trying to keep you on your toes," he chuckled, (toes." He chuckled. It's not a speech tag, but an action tag.)
"Cheers to that!" and with that everyone clinked glasses. (action tag not a speech tag, that!" Everybody clinked their glasses.)
reply by the author on 17-Mar-2025
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You have a great story line. I enjoyed reading. Please keep an eye out for the action tags.
"Yes, I'm sorry about that. Just an untimely case of butter fingers," trying to down play the whole thing (You have an action tag following dialogue, try --"Yes, I'm sorry about that. Just an untimely case of butter fingers." She tried to downplay the whole thing.)
"Lighten up everybody. Just trying to keep you on your toes," he chuckled, (toes." He chuckled. It's not a speech tag, but an action tag.)
"Cheers to that!" and with that everyone clinked glasses. (action tag not a speech tag, that!" Everybody clinked their glasses.)
Comment Written 17-Mar-2025
reply by the author on 17-Mar-2025
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Great edits! Thx so much! Lori
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I fixed them! Thank you! Appreciate you tidying it up!
Comment from Cecilia A Heiskary
Lori,
This is a great chapter that continues nicely. I see that things are starting to heat up as time goes on. I bet the second course will serve up some of the same.
Well done
Cecilia
reply by the author on 17-Mar-2025
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Lori,
This is a great chapter that continues nicely. I see that things are starting to heat up as time goes on. I bet the second course will serve up some of the same.
Well done
Cecilia
Comment Written 17-Mar-2025
reply by the author on 17-Mar-2025
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Thanks, Cecilila! Your review means a lot to me!
Comment from JohnnySnowblind
"Despite entering 'The First Course' without prior context, I was immediately intrigued by Lori Mulligan's elegant and tense resort setting. Eve's strong reaction to Max, described as a 'bombshell' in a 'librarian guise,' was a highlight, hinting at a compelling backstory. Max's charismatic mystery, though, left me with a sense of unease. The writing is vivid, creating a clear picture of the luxurious atmosphere. I'm eager to see how the character dynamics and plot threads, including the separated couples and Mark's behavior, unfold in future chapters. The brief mention of Ulla and Chapter 3 was a nice touch, giving a small glimpse into what's to come. I'm looking forward to reading more."
reply by the author on 16-Mar-2025
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"Despite entering 'The First Course' without prior context, I was immediately intrigued by Lori Mulligan's elegant and tense resort setting. Eve's strong reaction to Max, described as a 'bombshell' in a 'librarian guise,' was a highlight, hinting at a compelling backstory. Max's charismatic mystery, though, left me with a sense of unease. The writing is vivid, creating a clear picture of the luxurious atmosphere. I'm eager to see how the character dynamics and plot threads, including the separated couples and Mark's behavior, unfold in future chapters. The brief mention of Ulla and Chapter 3 was a nice touch, giving a small glimpse into what's to come. I'm looking forward to reading more."
Comment Written 16-Mar-2025
reply by the author on 16-Mar-2025
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Wow! Thanks for such an amazing review! I’m so glad you're hooked. I'm sure Ulla will do an excellent job! Can't wait to see what’s next! Thx for shiny sixth star!
Comment from Michael Ludwinder
Your chapter pulls me in right away! The tension is thick! The characters are so interesting. Max is both charming and unsettling in the best way! And that moment when Mark gets caught was brilliant! I can already tell things are about to get even more interesting. Can't wait to see what happens next!
reply by the author on 16-Mar-2025
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Your chapter pulls me in right away! The tension is thick! The characters are so interesting. Max is both charming and unsettling in the best way! And that moment when Mark gets caught was brilliant! I can already tell things are about to get even more interesting. Can't wait to see what happens next!
Comment Written 16-Mar-2025
reply by the author on 16-Mar-2025
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Thanks for such a great review! Can't wait to
See where it goes next!
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Would you be game for writing a chapter? If so, message Carol (Begin Again)
Comment from Begin Again
Food is the best way to get people talking and I wonder what else they seem to be doing...almost openly already. You did a great job of setting up the first dinner together, and I can't wait to see where it goes from here. Especially with Eve dropping her glass of wine when she saw their host. Here we go!
Smiles, Carol
reply by the author on 16-Mar-2025
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Food is the best way to get people talking and I wonder what else they seem to be doing...almost openly already. You did a great job of setting up the first dinner together, and I can't wait to see where it goes from here. Especially with Eve dropping her glass of wine when she saw their host. Here we go!
Smiles, Carol
Comment Written 16-Mar-2025
reply by the author on 16-Mar-2025
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Thanks, Carol! You set me up well to have a lot of fun with revealing a few things here and there! Thx again!
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Hope we can get some more people interested. Ulla is next and I sent her a message but then we don't have anyone asking about it. Fingers crossed.
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Well, we've gotten good reviews so hopefully we will get some takers.
Comment from patcelaw
This is very well written and I very much enjoyed listening to it. It moves very well when it is read aloud. Your sentence structure, your paragraphing and your punctuational make it for a wonderful piece to listen to. Patricia.
reply by the author on 16-Mar-2025
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This is very well written and I very much enjoyed listening to it. It moves very well when it is read aloud. Your sentence structure, your paragraphing and your punctuational make it for a wonderful piece to listen to. Patricia.
Comment Written 16-Mar-2025
reply by the author on 16-Mar-2025
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Thanks Patricia for your positive, well-rounded review.
Comment from Marilyn Hamilton
This sounds like the start of a cool story. Most of all I wad impressed by the menu options and wish I was invited. Lol can't wait to see what the others bring to the following chapters. Thanks for sharing.
reply by the author on 16-Mar-2025
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This sounds like the start of a cool story. Most of all I wad impressed by the menu options and wish I was invited. Lol can't wait to see what the others bring to the following chapters. Thanks for sharing.
Comment Written 16-Mar-2025
reply by the author on 16-Mar-2025
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Yeah, I thought the food sounded pretty yummy too. Thx for the positive review! Can't wait to
See where it goes too.