Comment from SAPIRE

Excellent

I must express my utmost delight and admiration for the exquisite children's poetry crafted by these young minds. Their imaginative verses ignite a vibrant tapestry of emotions and inspire boundless creativity. With rhythmic precision and charming simplicity, their words transport us to whimsical realms where dreams flourish and laughter dances. These young talents possess an innate gift for storytelling, effortlessly weaving vivid imagery and heartfelt messages. Each line is a brushstroke of pure innocence, depicting unadulterated joy. Their verses are like rays of sunshine, illuminating the path to wonder and discovery. The future of literature shines brightly through their captivating words, and I eagerly anticipate their blossoming journey as poetic prodigies.
Signed [SAPIRE]

 Comment Written 01-Jun-2023

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reply by the author on 01-Jun-2023

Thanks so much for your feedback!
Xo
Jessica

Comment from godlucifer

Excellent

its always sad to leave behind memories as a kid. i think time will heal all wounds as the kid familiar themsevles with the new place. your poem was well described. thanks for the read.

truly
godlucifer

 Comment Written 31-May-2023

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reply by the author on 01-Jun-2023

Thanks so much for your feedback!
Xo
Jessica

Comment from jmdg1954

Excellent

Fun-tastc poem. I felt like I was walking besides Molly from line to line.

We moved once when our three kids were little. They were sad leaving friends behind. But certainly made a lot of life long new ones,

Great contest entry.
John

 Comment Written 31-May-2023

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reply by the author on 01-Jun-2023

Thank you so much, John, for your feedback!
Xo
Jessica

Comment from Terry Broxson

Excellent

I think this is a very well-done poem for this contest. We never had children. But it seems to me you did capture some of the feelings and emotions a child might have with a move. I loved the things she wanted to take but couldn't. Excellent. Terry.

 Comment Written 31-May-2023

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reply by the author on 01-Jun-2023

Thanks so much for your feedback, Terry!
Xo
Jessica

Comment from Boogienights

Excellent

This is truly awesome. I love how you captured the feelings of a young child, starting somewhere new. The rhyming is on point, the story well told and inventive. Thanks for sharing. :)

 Comment Written 31-May-2023

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reply by the author on 01-Jun-2023

Thanks so much for your feedback!
Xo
Jessica

Comment from Paul McFarland

Excellent

This is a really good children's poem, Jessica. I'll bet that many of us have gone through that same experience. For me it was moving from an uninsulated camp into a regular house. I looked forward to that move.

 Comment Written 31-May-2023

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reply by the author on 01-Jun-2023

Thanks so much for your feedback, Paul!
Xo
Jessica

Comment from Pearl Edwards

Excellent

I like how Molly tried to pack away the things important to her, like her growth marks, and her footsteps in the concrete. This is a lovely children's rhyming poem Jessica, well told.
Typo - A a perfect climbing tree.
Good luck in the contest, cheers,
valda

 Comment Written 31-May-2023

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reply by the author on 01-Jun-2023

Thanks so much for your feedback! And thank you for the catch, I'll fix that! :)
Xo
Jessica

Comment from Sanku

Excellent

This is a lovely poem for the children .I admire how you portrayed her discomfort of leaving a place of familiarity and shifting to a new house. I smiled when I read that she could not move the wall or door! all the best for the contest...

 Comment Written 31-May-2023

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reply by the author on 01-Jun-2023

Thanks so much for your feedback!
Xo
Jessica

Comment from RobertaLee

Excellent

Adorable child's perspective ... such innocence to try to take the concrete. Your story telling is consistent, as is your rhyme scheme. The flow of some stanzas was a bit inconsistent; perhaps counting the syllables would be helpful. All together a poem I would read to my grandchildren with joy.

 Comment Written 31-May-2023

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reply by the author on 01-Jun-2023

Thanks so much for your feedback!
Xo
Jessica

Comment from Jannypan (Jan)

Excellent

You did a great job with your poem, Jessica.
I enjoyed reading it. You shared it well from
the POV of Molly. Your rhyme scheme worked
wonders. The lines flowed smoothly and created
great imagery. You told this just like what a
young child would think. I'm happy for her as
she discovered there would be new adventures.
Thanks for sharing, Jan

 Comment Written 30-May-2023

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reply by the author on 01-Jun-2023

Thank you so much, Jan! I appreciate your feedback!
Xo
Jess