FanStory.com - Santa's New Christmas Plan by Terry Broxson

BACKGROUND

The history of Santa Claus, his magic, and the wonder of Christmas have been well documented. However, some details about planning, logistics, and organization have been left ambiguous until now. Santa gave permission to Terry Twinklestar, historian for the Santa Cultural Museum, to record previously unknown aspects of life in the most magical of places.

A NEW PLAN

The big calendar on Santa's North Pole workshop flipped over from November, and the countdown had begun. Tension arose in the air. This year was going to be different.

Santa had told everyone in the January review meeting he wanted to improve the method of distribution.

"We need to modernize. I have been watching what Jeff did. He grew up and started Amazon."

Mrs. Claus says, "I love Amazon, and Prime is a great deal. I get fast delivery and a ton of videos. I can watch Miracle on 34th Street three hundred sixty-five days a year."

"That is lovely, dear, but we must improve our delivery system. We don't need to copy what Jeff did because we have Santa's Christmas magic. But we need some regional facilities to improve our efficiency. I want us to spend the next several months strategizing a new and better plan."

And so, Santa's challenge for 2022 would be the first significant change to Christmas in over one hundred years.

Pinnacle Niche held the title of Executive Vice President of Operational Services. The only other elf to have his level of responsibility and status was the lovely Regina Gayla. Regina served as the Executive Vice President of Reindeer Services. Both elves reported directly to Santa.

Pinnacle and Regina had been tasked with planning and implementing the new delivery system. In January 2022, Pinnacle and Regina held their first session to achieve the goals Santa had outlined.

"Regina, you look so elegant in your orange dress and sweater. After so much red the past couple of months, it's nice to see something different."

"Thank you, Pinnacle, and you look dashing in the royal blue waistcoat and trousers."

"I've been looking forward to hearing your ideas for the new methodology Santa desires."

"Okay, my thinking is we build off the current reindeer modus operandi we have in place. It should not be too challenging to add Santa bag refill stations next to reindeer exchange stables."

"Holly, sweet gum drops! That is exactly my thinking."

"Excellent! let's get some Big Chief Tablets and a few boxes of Crayolas and put the details on paper so we can present it to Santa."

HISTORY OF THE REINDEER STATIONS

There are not eight tiny reindeer plus Rudolph that pull Santa's sleigh. Actually, fifty-six teams are stationed throughout the world.

Santa adopted what the Pony Express had done in the Old West to deliver the mail more quickly. Santa rightly figured if he had new teams of reindeer to replace tiring teams, he could make his annual trip around the world faster. Over the years, the number of teams expanded.

Today, there are fifty-six Cupids, Donners, Blitzens, and so forth. Over the years, using Santa's Christmas Magic, training, and experience, the reindeer exchanges were seamless and very quick.

Regina explained to historian Terry Twinklestar, "Santa only has to remember eight names. It also comes in handy when we hold the reindeer games to determine which team wins THE STANTA CUP. We never have to change the names on the cup, only the team number."

RUDOLPH

Rudolph's history and his shiny red nose are a delight to all. Santa needed him to guide his sleigh one foggy Christmas Eve night. But that was not the end of the story. There is only one Rudolph on the sleigh each Christmas Eve.

The fact is the son of Rudolph replaces his father every three years. The succession strategy ensures the leader is young and strong for the arduous trip. More than a dozen retired Rudolphs provided instruction and wisdom for navigation. They are known as the Wise Council of Rudolph.

Contrary to popular opinion, Rudolph does not actually participate in reindeer games. He is the Grand Marshall and, along with Santa, presents THE SANTA CUP to the winning team.

SANTA MAGIC

Some elves believe Santa has more magic than is known. That is because he occasionally does things no elf has ever seen before. For example, when he created a rocket ship, for young Jeff one Christmas, out of multi-colored jelly beans.

The most amazing thing about Santa's magic is how it refills his bag of gifts and toys. The best way to explain it; is that a sort of "Worm Hole" between the North Pole and Santa's sleigh opens when Santa's bag needs a refill. Santa opens the connection, and the toys and gifts fly from the North Pole to the bag.

It takes hundreds of refills during the trip. The magic, of course, is very fast, but sometimes the distance required for the refill takes more time than Santa wants. This is the reason Santa wants a new delivery system.

SANTA GETS THE PLAN

Pinnacle and Regina's presentation to Santa used one hundred twelve pages of Big Chief tablets. It was color-coded and beautifully drawn and illustrated, as only elves can do. The heart of the proposal called for fifty-six distribution centers next to the reindeer stations.

Each warehouse will have all the gifts and toys necessary for a designated geographical area. Santa's magic will be used to restock Santa's bag from the warehouse and therefore save time through shorter distances than refilling from the North Pole.

Pinnacle and Regina declared, "Santa, we will reduce our refill time by an estimated fifty-two percent!'

"Ho, Ho, Ho, that is wonderful news. Mrs. Claus will be so happy to see me before the sun comes up."

Pinnacle and Regina look at each other, and Pinnacle says, "There is only one problem."

"Problem, you know I don't like problems."

Pinnacle explains. "Santa, it's a technical issue; I won't bore you with the details. The relay connection is weak over Texas. It will affect the deliveries in Mexico and South America. We have a solution. But it will require your okay."

"We can boost our connection by having a sub-relay between a spaceship and the warehouse to the sleigh," Regina says. "But we can not use NASA. Because it would involve the government, which is against your principles."

"Yes, I can't have governments interfere or be involved with my mission. What do we do?"

Pinnacle says, "We ask a private citizen to help; Jeff Bezo's spaceship, Blue Origin, would be perfect. If we time it right, it will work."

"Excellent, Jeff is still on the good list. Let's contact him and see if he will get on board."

SANTA and JEFF

Santa uses his new Sphone22 to call Jeff. Santa's ringtone is Here Comes Santa Claus.

Jeff says, "Santa, is this actually you?"

"Yes, it's really me. I must say I've been very pleased with what you have accomplished. But I need your help."

Jeff excitedly responds, "Whatever you want, Santa. Just tell me how much and where to send the check."

"Look, I appreciate the offer, but I don't need money. I need your spaceship. I only need it for about three minutes at an altitude of 62 miles over Texas on Christmas Eve."

Jeff responds, "Santa, that will not be a problem. What kind of crew do I need?"

"You don't need a crew. We will place an electronic relay black box, except ours is red with Christmas cookies and candy canes, to help with my deliveries. The relay will be quick; I don't expect any issues."

"Santa, it will be my honor. I will pilot the Blue Origin personally."

***

CHRISTMAS MORNING, DECEMBER 25, 2022

The North Pole is buzzing with excitement. Santa has called a meeting of all the elf executives, managers, and line workers at the North Pole and set up a Zoom meeting with all elves in the warehouses and reindeer stations worldwide, including Jeff in Texas.

"HO, HO, HO! We have set a record for the fastest delivery ever. Fifty-one minutes better than our best time recorded two years ago! Congratulations to everyone!

Tiny Tim says, "God bless us, everyone!"

Regina asks, "What is Tiny Tim doing in this story?"

With a wink of his eye, Santa replies, "Why not? It's Christmas."

Sunday, December 25, 2022.

Faithfully Recorded

Terry Twinklestar

Historian

Santa Cultural Museum