Have you ever wondered, what's in a real blokes shed?
I bet you thought them full of junk, but I'm telling you instead.
I've had the privilege to peruse, such a shed one night,
It's owned by mate Kenny, who opened up my eyes.

There was carpet on the floor, compressors by the door,
Nuts and bolts, fishing rods, and Fosters cans galore.
And if you wanted any oil, like sewing, sump or mower,
Just look around you'll find it stored, an ice-cream tub's the gower.

A pair of boots a little tight, he'll fix for future toil,
As Kenny's way to make them fit is dip the toes in oil.
And when I asked " what's that you've got" hidden under wraps?
A photocopy machine he said, and next I'll need a fax.

Oh what delights this shed has brought, all useful stuff in here,
There's even shinny rolls of foil, that holds your can of beer.
I looked around and then I spied, a cot upon the wall,
In storage now, he'll pass it on, to elder son named Paul.

A yellow bird cage for the day, a bird he may pick up,
But have no fear, Jeanette my dear, the feathered kinds enough.
Next to the cage, a machine to sew, a little worse for wear,
But Ken still keeps it just in case, his overalls might tear.

Equipment plus and flashing stuff, in draws quite neatly stored,
And tucked away a paper too, in case you're ever bored.
Although it's news has come and gone, of what, why, when and how,
This 97 edition's rare, a collectors item now.

However in this shed don't smoke, no ashtray can be found,
It's tucked away, so if you must, just butt upon the ground.
And for those dark and dismal days, a torch you may require,
Ken has several he would lend, if ever you enquire.

When talking old but useful parts, yes most still have a spare,
In case of breakdown of the first, of course that would be rare.
Kens shed has lots of shi........ny gear, some new quite fit to hock,
But parting with equipment here, for Ken would bring on shock.

So hear now folks and listen well, a real blokes shed has all,
It's contents stored on bench or floor and even up the wall.
And if you ever need a bit, of this, or even that,
Go to a real blokes shed you'll find every bit of crap.

Christine