Caught Out
The Missus will always notice.12 total reviews
Comment from Raul1
She caught him for stealing and now Ronnie feels guilty. I find your story very humorous. Excellent work! Congratulations on winning Second Place! Nice job.
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She caught him for stealing and now Ronnie feels guilty. I find your story very humorous. Excellent work! Congratulations on winning Second Place! Nice job.
Comment Written 16-Feb-2020
Comment from Sharon Haiste
I think this is a good entry for the 100 Word Flash Fiction writing prompt.
This short story tells of a thief in the night.
Well done and I wish you luck with the contest.
Sharon
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I think this is a good entry for the 100 Word Flash Fiction writing prompt.
This short story tells of a thief in the night.
Well done and I wish you luck with the contest.
Sharon
Comment Written 16-Feb-2020
Comment from rockmann
Even the smartest crooks make mistakes, isn't that right Ronnie? Ha, he should have known better than to try to trick his wife. I really like the first paragraph, it set the tone perfectly. Good luck in the contest.
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Even the smartest crooks make mistakes, isn't that right Ronnie? Ha, he should have known better than to try to trick his wife. I really like the first paragraph, it set the tone perfectly. Good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 16-Feb-2020
Comment from Susan Larson
Cute story and cute ending.I love your hook. "Ronnie's urge was strong. Gwen didn't like what he did," It really got me engaged and made me want to read on. Good luck in the contest.
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Cute story and cute ending.I love your hook. "Ronnie's urge was strong. Gwen didn't like what he did," It really got me engaged and made me want to read on. Good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 16-Feb-2020
Comment from Katherine M. (k-11)
This a very readable flash fiction. It has a strong beginning (desire to do more than misbehave, versus detection) a well-developed middle (preparation, misbehaviour and its consequences, the bulk of the story) and a twist in the tale at the end (the surprising detection). Simple but effective.
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This a very readable flash fiction. It has a strong beginning (desire to do more than misbehave, versus detection) a well-developed middle (preparation, misbehaviour and its consequences, the bulk of the story) and a twist in the tale at the end (the surprising detection). Simple but effective.
Comment Written 16-Feb-2020
Comment from Shirley McLain
Very nice story. You did a great job on this flash fiction. You told the story in very few words and it contained the components of Flash Fiction. Good luck in the contest. Shirley
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Very nice story. You did a great job on this flash fiction. You told the story in very few words and it contained the components of Flash Fiction. Good luck in the contest. Shirley
Comment Written 16-Feb-2020
Comment from BethShelby
Cute flash fiction. I imagine waking up to a black face when it should be white would give you quite a start. She didn't seem too upset. Maybe some new jewelry would calm down her reaction negative reaction.
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Cute flash fiction. I imagine waking up to a black face when it should be white would give you quite a start. She didn't seem too upset. Maybe some new jewelry would calm down her reaction negative reaction.
Comment Written 15-Feb-2020
Comment from Janet Foor
Cute story for the 100 word flash fiction writing prompt with a fun twist at the end.
Very nicely done and good luck in the contest.
Blessings
Janet
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Cute story for the 100 word flash fiction writing prompt with a fun twist at the end.
Very nicely done and good luck in the contest.
Blessings
Janet
Comment Written 15-Feb-2020
Comment from Jannypan (Jan)
Yes, the wife always knows, Anon. I enjoyed your contest entry. Good job with the prompt. The ending first and was unexpected. Thanks for sharing. Respectfully, Jan
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Yes, the wife always knows, Anon. I enjoyed your contest entry. Good job with the prompt. The ending first and was unexpected. Thanks for sharing. Respectfully, Jan
Comment Written 15-Feb-2020
Comment from Mr.write_4u
Ha! She would have known even if he didn't forget the makeup. They know everything. Seriously, I enjoyed the read. For a short story, you had me anticipating. Well done. Good luck.
Happy writing,
Larry
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Ha! She would have known even if he didn't forget the makeup. They know everything. Seriously, I enjoyed the read. For a short story, you had me anticipating. Well done. Good luck.
Happy writing,
Larry
Comment Written 15-Feb-2020