The Incomparable Fanny Barnwarmer
Viewing comments for Chapter 13 "Incomparable Fanny Barnwarmer 13"America's First Female Comic
32 total reviews
Comment from giraffmang
Hi Jay,
this is an intriguing piece. I've missed a few so I'm in the midst of catching up.
Fanny needs to keep the reporter on his toes here. lol
All the best
G
reply by the author on 25-Jul-2022
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Hi Jay,
this is an intriguing piece. I've missed a few so I'm in the midst of catching up.
Fanny needs to keep the reporter on his toes here. lol
All the best
G
Comment Written 24-Jul-2022
reply by the author on 25-Jul-2022
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Yes, this play would have wilted on the vine if it weren't for the balancing act of Robert Holmdahl.
Jay
Comment from Liz O'Neill
Wher yever git this here sayin'? I luvit:
"Ya c'n crank y'alls neck in, Robert." Never herd it afore, cept the las time you used it. Still luvit. Fanny always does a fine job with her dramatic similes and metaphors. Oh my, this is good. Am I sensing days of darkness ahead OR will miss Fanny get involved in somethong else? In the meantime ...A+ for you Jay
reply by the author on 13-Jul-2022
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Wher yever git this here sayin'? I luvit:
"Ya c'n crank y'alls neck in, Robert." Never herd it afore, cept the las time you used it. Still luvit. Fanny always does a fine job with her dramatic similes and metaphors. Oh my, this is good. Am I sensing days of darkness ahead OR will miss Fanny get involved in somethong else? In the meantime ...A+ for you Jay
Comment Written 13-Jul-2022
reply by the author on 13-Jul-2022
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Did you read the author's notes where I gave credit to the fine lady who gave me that quote? Hmmmmm? Thank you, my dear, for your kindness and the six stars!
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Guess I better luk it up
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Whoa I'm honored, mighty honored
Comment from Father Flaps
Hi Jay,
How are you doing? I'm assuming you've found your way out of the Covid forest. I'm mighty glad of that. My youngest son, Luke, and his wife, Leslie, and 2 year old daughter, Isla, are just coming out of those same woods. Leslie is a nurse in the Dialysis Department at the Regional Hospital here in Saint John. She brought the virus home to Luke & Isla. It hasn't been fun for them, as you'd expect. We've taken over groceries, suppers, iced coffees, and a few new toys for Isla to cheer them. But Covid is no walk in the park.
I was hoping you'd soon be able to get back at Fanny's tale.
I enjoyed the addition of Herbie. His arrival with the suitcases reminds us of the nearing hour of the reporter's departure, and the end of Fanny's story. As she continues with the "rest of the story", there's tension in the air.
Fanny tells the reporter how the judge retreated to a southern state after the trial, bad publicity and all. And Thurston Flourney moved to Brady City where he bought land and cattle. I enjoyed the part about the cartoons in the newspapers ... "cartoons with his big coat pockets an' with jedge Weitherton hangin' outta one' of 'em".
I also liked the part about Mrs. Albright hiring the Pinkertons to find out where Thurston relocated. But it was sad that she gave up on taking revenge herself, but instead slowly shifted that reckoning onto her daughter. The assassin would be Juniper. Mrs. Albright didn't give thought to what the outcome would be for her daughter. She was only thinking of herself. She wanted to make Thurston pay for her husband's death.
You know, Jay, I'm just thinking... when the reporter has to run to catch that train, it might be nice to have Juniper's ghost return, sitting in that rocker, and Fanny turning her head to acknowledge her dear friend. Together. Satisfied. The one waiting for the other... "stepping out of the shadowed area, JUNIPER, in a long white gown, a misty nimbus of light surrounding her..."
And off goes the reporter with his suitcases and a scribbled story.
Looking forward to the closing scene, Jay. I know you must be worn out from Covid, but dig deep and polish this play off in fine fashion. You can do it!
Cheers,
Kimbob
p.s. Oh, by the way, loved that bit about the "crack in th' chamberpot"!
reply by the author on 13-Jul-2022
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Hi Jay,
How are you doing? I'm assuming you've found your way out of the Covid forest. I'm mighty glad of that. My youngest son, Luke, and his wife, Leslie, and 2 year old daughter, Isla, are just coming out of those same woods. Leslie is a nurse in the Dialysis Department at the Regional Hospital here in Saint John. She brought the virus home to Luke & Isla. It hasn't been fun for them, as you'd expect. We've taken over groceries, suppers, iced coffees, and a few new toys for Isla to cheer them. But Covid is no walk in the park.
I was hoping you'd soon be able to get back at Fanny's tale.
I enjoyed the addition of Herbie. His arrival with the suitcases reminds us of the nearing hour of the reporter's departure, and the end of Fanny's story. As she continues with the "rest of the story", there's tension in the air.
Fanny tells the reporter how the judge retreated to a southern state after the trial, bad publicity and all. And Thurston Flourney moved to Brady City where he bought land and cattle. I enjoyed the part about the cartoons in the newspapers ... "cartoons with his big coat pockets an' with jedge Weitherton hangin' outta one' of 'em".
I also liked the part about Mrs. Albright hiring the Pinkertons to find out where Thurston relocated. But it was sad that she gave up on taking revenge herself, but instead slowly shifted that reckoning onto her daughter. The assassin would be Juniper. Mrs. Albright didn't give thought to what the outcome would be for her daughter. She was only thinking of herself. She wanted to make Thurston pay for her husband's death.
You know, Jay, I'm just thinking... when the reporter has to run to catch that train, it might be nice to have Juniper's ghost return, sitting in that rocker, and Fanny turning her head to acknowledge her dear friend. Together. Satisfied. The one waiting for the other... "stepping out of the shadowed area, JUNIPER, in a long white gown, a misty nimbus of light surrounding her..."
And off goes the reporter with his suitcases and a scribbled story.
Looking forward to the closing scene, Jay. I know you must be worn out from Covid, but dig deep and polish this play off in fine fashion. You can do it!
Cheers,
Kimbob
p.s. Oh, by the way, loved that bit about the "crack in th' chamberpot"!
Comment Written 13-Jul-2022
reply by the author on 13-Jul-2022
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DAaaaamn! Your creative mind doesn't slow down, does it? That idea about Juni's re-appearance is gold! And it also ties in ... in some wonky way with Fanny's memory lapse about the wedding. I'll see if I can work it in without adding another scene.
Last night I finished my final dose of the Covid anti-viral meds and I'm in fine fettle this morning! My heart goes out to your loved ones who are working through that mire.
Don't give up on Elizabeth Albright's humanity quite yet.
Thanks, Kimbob, for the review I always wait for -- and of course the six stars.
Jay
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Can't wait to read it, Jay!!!
Comment from nomi338
History has taught me that revenge is never sweet when it involves killing someone. The taking of a human life does something to you that never goes away. I changes you in a profound way. I believe that God who is the creator and prolonger of life put something into man that acts as a punishment to prevent wholesale killing.
reply by the author on 12-Jul-2022
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History has taught me that revenge is never sweet when it involves killing someone. The taking of a human life does something to you that never goes away. I changes you in a profound way. I believe that God who is the creator and prolonger of life put something into man that acts as a punishment to prevent wholesale killing.
Comment Written 12-Jul-2022
reply by the author on 12-Jul-2022
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I think you are right about that, Nolan. Call it conscience or whatever, it keeps us from being total brutes.
Jay
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Amen.
Comment from lancellot
The story continues. I think you do a good job with limiting the stage directions to simple movement and observations of the actors. Everything looks well written to me.
reply by the author on 12-Jul-2022
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The story continues. I think you do a good job with limiting the stage directions to simple movement and observations of the actors. Everything looks well written to me.
Comment Written 12-Jul-2022
reply by the author on 12-Jul-2022
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Like I said to you a few reviews ago, if it weren't for the internal commitment to complete this ... I'd have let it slip into obscurity several scenes ago. Thanks for weighing in, Lance.
Comment from Fleedleflump
You've done a great job with eking out the revelations so we keep learning more tidbits and seeing more layers of the onion. Loved the dialect as always, and this carried me though without anything hitching of giving me pause. Great work :-)
Mike
reply by the author on 12-Jul-2022
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You've done a great job with eking out the revelations so we keep learning more tidbits and seeing more layers of the onion. Loved the dialect as always, and this carried me though without anything hitching of giving me pause. Great work :-)
Mike
Comment Written 12-Jul-2022
reply by the author on 12-Jul-2022
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Thank you, Mike. I am SOOO ready to bring this to an end. Not that I've fallen out of love with it, but sustaining her dialect is like learning a new language. Also, it's time.
Comment from lyenochka
Or perhaps, Miss Juniper inherited that anger and developed that revenge all her own? I'm worried that they are still talking and the reporter has a train to catch!
Great scene here and I liked that you hinted at Miss Fanny's memory with her conversation with Herbie. It won't be too long until she wouldn't be able to relay her story to the reporter.
One nit:
But You're saying she was driven (you're) unless the capitalization is for emphasis but italics can do that.
reply by the author on 12-Jul-2022
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Or perhaps, Miss Juniper inherited that anger and developed that revenge all her own? I'm worried that they are still talking and the reporter has a train to catch!
Great scene here and I liked that you hinted at Miss Fanny's memory with her conversation with Herbie. It won't be too long until she wouldn't be able to relay her story to the reporter.
One nit:
But You're saying she was driven (you're) unless the capitalization is for emphasis but italics can do that.
Comment Written 12-Jul-2022
reply by the author on 12-Jul-2022
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Join the legions who are troubled by the time. Like a mama looking out for her son ... "You're gonna miss your train!" LOL, It's an unnecessary tension. I'll have to take care of it, Mama! Thank you for the catch. I took care of it.
Comment from tfawcus
Another fine scene in this enthralling drama, Jay. I like the way Fanny is now prompting the reporter to make sure there are no loose ends and important facets missed.
reply by the author on 12-Jul-2022
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Another fine scene in this enthralling drama, Jay. I like the way Fanny is now prompting the reporter to make sure there are no loose ends and important facets missed.
Comment Written 12-Jul-2022
reply by the author on 12-Jul-2022
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I've been worried about you, Tony. I believe you owe us a chapter. I've been holding a six ... but my fingers are getting slippery. LOL, thanks friend for weighing in on this, and of course for the sixer. The play's nearing the end. It's time.
Jay
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Thanks for your concern, Jay. I've been away for a week visiting my daughter in Brisbane and have caught a nasty chest infection from my granddaughter which looks like laying me low for a while.
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Did you test it for covid? The cold I thought I had tested positive for Covid. I'm hoping to be symptom free in a few days.
Comment from Carol Hillebrenner
Excellent job of writing and explaining how Miss Juniper became the assassin. Or maybe not, since this is the cliffhanger you ended this scene on. Looking forward to next scene as the hour winds down.
reply by the author on 11-Jul-2022
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Excellent job of writing and explaining how Miss Juniper became the assassin. Or maybe not, since this is the cliffhanger you ended this scene on. Looking forward to next scene as the hour winds down.
Comment Written 11-Jul-2022
reply by the author on 11-Jul-2022
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Thank you, Carol. We don't know the making of the assassin yet. We do know that the Reporter has asked a question that must be addressed. I'm glad you're enjoying it!
Comment from Ric Myworld
It's almost hard to imagine a West coater who can decipher and write in such a southern dialect successfully, anyone other than you, the word wizard. LOL. Thanks for sharing.
reply by the author on 11-Jul-2022
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It's almost hard to imagine a West coater who can decipher and write in such a southern dialect successfully, anyone other than you, the word wizard. LOL. Thanks for sharing.
Comment Written 11-Jul-2022
reply by the author on 11-Jul-2022
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Please accept my grateful appreciation for your kind words. Yours is one of ten reviews I answered (I hoped) thoughtfully ... only to have them erased after the tenth one. Consequently, this must sound generic, my friend.