Show and Tell
A student gets a bit too creative.27 total reviews
Comment from GregoryCody
YES!! HAHAHAHA. I knew I liked you ;)
This is a Great FF. First, you introduce the characters, then you set the scene, plot, then you have the GREAT twist. Your writing is succinct and it flows well. Awesome story teller. You can hear a voice in it, due to the humor imo. I love FF and I have never read a funny one that was written so well. Tight. Not one word unneeded or needed. Perfect form.
reply by the author on 06-Sep-2021
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YES!! HAHAHAHA. I knew I liked you ;)
This is a Great FF. First, you introduce the characters, then you set the scene, plot, then you have the GREAT twist. Your writing is succinct and it flows well. Awesome story teller. You can hear a voice in it, due to the humor imo. I love FF and I have never read a funny one that was written so well. Tight. Not one word unneeded or needed. Perfect form.
Comment Written 06-Sep-2021
reply by the author on 06-Sep-2021
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Thank you so much for a grat review. This one was no longer active but I appreciate your reading and I thrilled with the six stars. I'm so glad you found it funny. I've never wtitten much flash fiction and was delighted that people seemed to like it.
Beth
Comment from Pantygynt
This is very clever because it is also an example of writing that shows and does not tell. I think most of us will have guessed what the object is even before reading the note, which I think you should remove as this contest is for 'fiction' and your note really says that it is not. With it removed, the only reason for this not to win this contest would be if something better were to be posted. I think that is very unlikely.
reply by the author on 31-Aug-2021
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This is very clever because it is also an example of writing that shows and does not tell. I think most of us will have guessed what the object is even before reading the note, which I think you should remove as this contest is for 'fiction' and your note really says that it is not. With it removed, the only reason for this not to win this contest would be if something better were to be posted. I think that is very unlikely.
Comment Written 31-Aug-2021
reply by the author on 31-Aug-2021
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Thank you so much for the excellent review and comments. You're the second person to tell me I should remove the notes so I will. I especially appreciate this review because it is the 26th which should get it recognized. The six stars is another bonus.
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At 26 it should get ATB you only need 15 for recognition.
Comment from Bill Schott
This one-hundred-word story, Show and Tell, has the required word count and -- I mean -- Can you imagine? Ha ha ha. One knows what the SHOW is, but can only imagine what the TELL was.
reply by the author on 31-Aug-2021
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This one-hundred-word story, Show and Tell, has the required word count and -- I mean -- Can you imagine? Ha ha ha. One knows what the SHOW is, but can only imagine what the TELL was.
Comment Written 30-Aug-2021
reply by the author on 31-Aug-2021
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I think the teacher confiscated the show before the tell could began. I'm glad you got a chuckle.
Beth
Comment from Valerie Fish
Best laugh I've had all day, I could picture the scene ...
I was a teaching assistant for many years and both 'Show and Tell' and Monday's 'Weekend News' were often rather revealing.
We once found a packet of condoms in a child's lunchbox!
An entertaining story, well done .
reply by the author on 30-Aug-2021
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Best laugh I've had all day, I could picture the scene ...
I was a teaching assistant for many years and both 'Show and Tell' and Monday's 'Weekend News' were often rather revealing.
We once found a packet of condoms in a child's lunchbox!
An entertaining story, well done .
Comment Written 30-Aug-2021
reply by the author on 30-Aug-2021
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Thank you for the review and comments. Speaking of condoms, my daughter found a pack in a drawrer in our master bedroom room. She opened it and decided it would be the perfect raincoat for her Barbie. Her twin borther told her not cut it because it was balloon. I may use that for another flash.
Beth
Comment from J.R. Michael
So many times flash fiction can be so serious. Im t was a pleasant surprise to get a nice laugh out of this. Great pace and great zinger. Good luck with the contest.
reply by the author on 30-Aug-2021
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So many times flash fiction can be so serious. Im t was a pleasant surprise to get a nice laugh out of this. Great pace and great zinger. Good luck with the contest.
Comment Written 30-Aug-2021
reply by the author on 30-Aug-2021
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Thanks for the review. I'm glad you got a laugh.
Beth
Comment from LisaMay
If it was show and tell, I wonder how the child described the item. This is such an excruciatingly embarrassing event - very private item. Kids do things in all innocence that turn into legendary family stories. You've told it well.
reply by the author on 30-Aug-2021
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If it was show and tell, I wonder how the child described the item. This is such an excruciatingly embarrassing event - very private item. Kids do things in all innocence that turn into legendary family stories. You've told it well.
Comment Written 29-Aug-2021
reply by the author on 30-Aug-2021
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Thanks for the review. I don't think she got that far before the teacher teacher confiscated it. She probably planned to show it had a switch to make it vibrate. She didn't what it was. Her mother was humiliated.
Beth
Comment from muffinmama
Oh how embarrassing! Poor woman. Fortunately, the teacher was female; it could have been much worse.
I'm sure someone out there probably told her that one day she would laugh about it.
What's an appropriate punishment for rummaging through mother's private hiding places? LOL
Very funny; good luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 29-Aug-2021
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Oh how embarrassing! Poor woman. Fortunately, the teacher was female; it could have been much worse.
I'm sure someone out there probably told her that one day she would laugh about it.
What's an appropriate punishment for rummaging through mother's private hiding places? LOL
Very funny; good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 29-Aug-2021
reply by the author on 29-Aug-2021
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Thank you so much for the review and the comments. I'm glad you got a laugh.
Beth
Comment from Judy Lawless
This is funny, Beth. I think this might happen often. When I was in a pipe band, one young fellow was telling us about a "massager" his mother had. It vibrated. We couldn't be sure if we were interpreting this right, but it caused a lot of chuckles among the adults. Good luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 29-Aug-2021
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This is funny, Beth. I think this might happen often. When I was in a pipe band, one young fellow was telling us about a "massager" his mother had. It vibrated. We couldn't be sure if we were interpreting this right, but it caused a lot of chuckles among the adults. Good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 29-Aug-2021
reply by the author on 29-Aug-2021
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Thank you Judy. Kids can do a lot of things to embarrass their parents. It is probably mutual because parents tend to embarrass their kids.
Beth
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So true, Beth! lol
Comment from Mary Vigasin
Thank you for the laugh. It is a funny story embarrassing the mom and I bet the teacher too.
It is a family story that will be told for years in the family.
Good luck in the contest.
Regards,
Mary
reply by the author on 29-Aug-2021
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Thank you for the laugh. It is a funny story embarrassing the mom and I bet the teacher too.
It is a family story that will be told for years in the family.
Good luck in the contest.
Regards,
Mary
Comment Written 28-Aug-2021
reply by the author on 29-Aug-2021
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Thank you for the review and comments. I'm glad you got a chuckle from it.
Beth
Comment from Mary Shifman
This sort piece is just terrific. I don't know how you can capture so much in so few words. I have trouble writing anything interesting. I laughed and laughed over this one. I'm sitting in bed and my husband is asleep and I heard him grumbling but I don't care. This is so funny! That poor mother. I bet she made a point of helping her daughter with Show and Tell! Great job.
reply by the author on 28-Aug-2021
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This sort piece is just terrific. I don't know how you can capture so much in so few words. I have trouble writing anything interesting. I laughed and laughed over this one. I'm sitting in bed and my husband is asleep and I heard him grumbling but I don't care. This is so funny! That poor mother. I bet she made a point of helping her daughter with Show and Tell! Great job.
Comment Written 28-Aug-2021
reply by the author on 28-Aug-2021
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Thank you Mary. I appreciate the review and comments. I'm so glad you got a good laugh from it. I thought it was hilarious too when my friend told me what happened. She was so embarrassed.
Beth
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I'm still laughing about that. It's so funny I had to tell the story to my partner this morning! He laughed too.
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I'm so glad you both got a laugh form it.
Beth