A Fly on the Wall
Viewing comments for Chapter 8 "On Showing Up"A journal musings and assessments about situations
30 total reviews
Comment from Phyllis Stewart
Yes, I think you're right about showing up. I hate funerals and would never go anywhere near the casket, but I went to offer my sympathy and support to the families. Now that I can't get around without a wheelchair, I have an excuse to skip the funerals of so many of my old friends and family members that are dropping like flies at my age and beyond. :)
reply by the author on 02-Jun-2019
  |
Yes, I think you're right about showing up. I hate funerals and would never go anywhere near the casket, but I went to offer my sympathy and support to the families. Now that I can't get around without a wheelchair, I have an excuse to skip the funerals of so many of my old friends and family members that are dropping like flies at my age and beyond. :)
Comment Written 02-Jun-2019
reply by the author on 02-Jun-2019
-
I didn't know you were in a wheelchair, Phyllis. As my friend Ann (in the picture) says, "Old age is not for sissies!" xo
-
Oh, is that ever the truth!
Comment from juliaSjames
Beautifully written. You have a flair for drawing readers in with your first sentence, and for bringing your characters to life. ( Except the one in the casket, which would have made this a totally different tale)
I realize that you use your writing to underscore important messages. Delivering social sermons so gracefully that the reader absorbs without resistance. Very nice!
Yes, showing up is important. My goodness, I still recall my disappointment and dismay when my mother didn't attend a high school activity. I've forgotten what the activity was. But those bad feelings linger in my psyche.
Thanks for the incidental therapy. It's good to share after so many years.
reply by the author on 02-Jun-2019
|
Beautifully written. You have a flair for drawing readers in with your first sentence, and for bringing your characters to life. ( Except the one in the casket, which would have made this a totally different tale)
I realize that you use your writing to underscore important messages. Delivering social sermons so gracefully that the reader absorbs without resistance. Very nice!
Yes, showing up is important. My goodness, I still recall my disappointment and dismay when my mother didn't attend a high school activity. I've forgotten what the activity was. But those bad feelings linger in my psyche.
Thanks for the incidental therapy. It's good to share after so many years.
Comment Written 02-Jun-2019
reply by the author on 02-Jun-2019
-
Have you ever heard this saying (I think it's Maya Angelou): "You might forget exactly what someone said to you or what they did, but you will NEVER forget how they made you feel." It's the first thing that sprang to mind when you mentioned the high school activity your mom missed. Kind of remarkable, isn't it?
I especially appreciated your comment "delivering social sermons so gracefully that the reader absorbs without resistance." That's quite the compliment, and I couldn't appreciate it more. Thank you.
I also loved "(Except the one in the casket, which would have made this a totally different tale.)"HAHAHAAH. I was grateful I wasn't drinking anything when I read that, or I'd have spit it everywhere.
Thanks for a really great review in every way. I totally appreciate it. xo
-
My pleasure to read and review.
-
My pleasure to read and review.
Comment from damommy
You are so right about the importance of being there. It matters a lot!
You're mother is a lovely woman. Cherish the time you have with her. I lost mine last year. She was 96.
reply by the author on 02-Jun-2019
|
You are so right about the importance of being there. It matters a lot!
You're mother is a lovely woman. Cherish the time you have with her. I lost mine last year. She was 96.
Comment Written 02-Jun-2019
reply by the author on 02-Jun-2019
-
I adore her, and I do cherish every moment I get. I'm sorry to read that yours has passed, though, damommy. What was she like?
-
She was a little lady, like yours. We had such fun together, traveled a lot, did needlework together, had sleep-overs, we did a lot together. We were very close - I'm an only child. Or is that was an only child? Thank you for asking.
-
That makes the loss so substantially more painful, I'm sure. I'm glad you had such a beautiful memory-making life, though.
-
Thank you, sweet lady.
-
You are welcome, equally sweet lady. xo
Comment from Alex Rosel
This is a lovely, reflective piece. I think most people will be able to relate to the sentiments expressed. And it's written in a clear, concise manner that makes the reading of it a pleasure.
Just a couple of points that you might like to consider:
This was a bonafide newsflash to me. -- spag? Bona fide? The Chicago Manual of Style, seventeenth edition, 7.83, recommends open compounds.
To Do list -- spag? And here it's the opposite. To-do list.
The distinction is the entomology. Here, to-do is a single adjective created by combining two words. The previous, bona fide, is a direct import into our language from the Latin bona fide which has always been two words.
reply by the author on 02-Jun-2019
|
This is a lovely, reflective piece. I think most people will be able to relate to the sentiments expressed. And it's written in a clear, concise manner that makes the reading of it a pleasure.
Just a couple of points that you might like to consider:
This was a bonafide newsflash to me. -- spag? Bona fide? The Chicago Manual of Style, seventeenth edition, 7.83, recommends open compounds.
To Do list -- spag? And here it's the opposite. To-do list.
The distinction is the entomology. Here, to-do is a single adjective created by combining two words. The previous, bona fide, is a direct import into our language from the Latin bona fide which has always been two words.
Comment Written 02-Jun-2019
reply by the author on 02-Jun-2019
-
As always, Alex, I appreciate your help with edits. Thank you! xo
Comment from Colin John
Hi Rachelle, this is just a wonderful story with emphasis on your mom and your hubby and bet they sure appreciate you also. Thanks for sharing , Kind regards Colin X
reply by the author on 02-Jun-2019
 |
Hi Rachelle, this is just a wonderful story with emphasis on your mom and your hubby and bet they sure appreciate you also. Thanks for sharing , Kind regards Colin X
Comment Written 02-Jun-2019
reply by the author on 02-Jun-2019
-
You always say exactly what I need to hear, Colin. Thank you for this delightful review. xo
Comment from susand3022
Hi Rachelle! Here you are... putting it out there in a straight forward way so everyone can just "get it." I don't like wakes... or funerals either really, for that matter. I don't like saying goodbye. I don't want to be around a bunch of people when I fall to pieces, I'd rather be either by myself or with one or two other people... not in a crowd! Luckily for me, I have only had to attend one wake and not too many funerals... (those have all happened out of state). My parents are getting way up there though and I'm not looking forward to those tears... they will be numerous when that time comes. Hopefully after that... I won't have to deal with any for a good long time... (maybe I'll be next and I won't have to deal with any!) :)
reply by the author on 02-Jun-2019
|
Hi Rachelle! Here you are... putting it out there in a straight forward way so everyone can just "get it." I don't like wakes... or funerals either really, for that matter. I don't like saying goodbye. I don't want to be around a bunch of people when I fall to pieces, I'd rather be either by myself or with one or two other people... not in a crowd! Luckily for me, I have only had to attend one wake and not too many funerals... (those have all happened out of state). My parents are getting way up there though and I'm not looking forward to those tears... they will be numerous when that time comes. Hopefully after that... I won't have to deal with any for a good long time... (maybe I'll be next and I won't have to deal with any!) :)
Comment Written 02-Jun-2019
reply by the author on 02-Jun-2019
-
Whoa!! That is quite the final statement there, Woman! For sure, your PARENTS would not want that! Or your friends, children and other loved ones.
Thank you for the thought-provoking review. xo
-
Hey... I'm not talking about tomorrow here!!! Just saying that 30 years from now it wouldn't be bad to be the next in line so I don't have to go through any more of this crap after my parents are gone... lol
-
Much better!!!! : )
Comment from Bill Pinder
Excellent commentary on the importance of showing commitment to people by showing up for certain events. That is an important thing to be passed on in today's society. Thanks for sharing this reminder.
Bill
reply by the author on 02-Jun-2019
|
Excellent commentary on the importance of showing commitment to people by showing up for certain events. That is an important thing to be passed on in today's society. Thanks for sharing this reminder.
Bill
Comment Written 02-Jun-2019
reply by the author on 02-Jun-2019
-
Thank you for this very supportive review, Bill. I appreciate it. xo
Comment from Patty Palmer
This was enjoyable to read and hit home to me. You have to go to other people's gatherings if you want them to attend yours. I think of that whenever there is a funeral or some other engagement that I should attend but don't feel like it. Then I think about would want them to come to mine. So, I go!
reply by the author on 02-Jun-2019
|
This was enjoyable to read and hit home to me. You have to go to other people's gatherings if you want them to attend yours. I think of that whenever there is a funeral or some other engagement that I should attend but don't feel like it. Then I think about would want them to come to mine. So, I go!
Comment Written 02-Jun-2019
reply by the author on 02-Jun-2019
-
Exactly!! Thank you, Patricia, for hearing what I'm expressing. What writer doesn't love THAT?! xo
Comment from judester
Great little glimpse of your life. I am glad that you decided to show up at the wake, physically and emotionally. A powerful lesson learned. I love the photo of you and your mom, she looks great.
My mom is 92 and proud of it. Sometimes I tease her and say, "oh, my friend's mom is 93! and she goes, "whaaa" ...like no one can dare be older than her, haha. Have a peaceful Sunday, cheers, j
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 02-Jun-2019
|
Great little glimpse of your life. I am glad that you decided to show up at the wake, physically and emotionally. A powerful lesson learned. I love the photo of you and your mom, she looks great.
My mom is 92 and proud of it. Sometimes I tease her and say, "oh, my friend's mom is 93! and she goes, "whaaa" ...like no one can dare be older than her, haha. Have a peaceful Sunday, cheers, j
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 02-Jun-2019
reply by the author on 02-Jun-2019
-
HAHAHAHA!! I love your mom's spirit...and yours, you little tease!
Thanks for the wonderful review. xo
Comment from LisaMay
Nice story, important message well written. I can see why having Ann turn up would be such a delight. And lovely Bobby, what a rock. Now tell me, what is the Jewish take on open caskets? why is that a no-no?
I was pleased to see no wee marks on the carpet this time.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 02-Jun-2019
|
Nice story, important message well written. I can see why having Ann turn up would be such a delight. And lovely Bobby, what a rock. Now tell me, what is the Jewish take on open caskets? why is that a no-no?
I was pleased to see no wee marks on the carpet this time.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 02-Jun-2019
reply by the author on 02-Jun-2019
-
In Judaism, we have only closed caskets. In the Talmud it is written that it is forbidden to gaze upon the face of a dead person. On a more everyday level, it's done as a way to keep from losing respect for the deceased.
-
I have heard of some cultures where it is taboo to look at photos of dead people. I saw a warning sign in a museum notifying that there would be images of the departed.
I have a story I must write some time about going with a friend to pay my respects to a dead friend in an open coffin at an undertakers... we were both so overwhelmed that we got the giggles and ended up nearly hysterical and were asked to leave... not very dignified. Our dead friend would have thought it was funny though.
-
I can absolutely understand that. Bobby's office helper recently passed [during tax season, no less! What was he THINKING??!], and there was an open casket. Bobby's comment on the way home was, "Andy was wearing make-up! They made him look like Cesar Romero." And then we laughed for the rest of the ride home. But, just like your friend, Andy would have found that hysterical, too.
Somber just isn't for everyone.
-
HAHAHA. I just now saw the comment about no wee marks on the carpet! You are so bad.
-
What an upset for Bobby's office. Trust you to see the black humour of Andy's timing and to cackle about his looks!!
Cesar Romero was definitely a pretty boy. I found a couple of quotes: I'm 86 and my doctor used to tell me to slow down - at least he did until he dropped dead.
George Murphy tagged that name "Butch" on me years ago. We were all at a party and he went around tagging names on people that didn't fit them.
-
So bad!!! So hilariously bad. See why we were meant to be friends, LisaMay? It's probably better for civilization that we live continents away from each other.