The Incomparable Fanny Barnwarmer
Viewing comments for Chapter 16 "Incomparable Fanny Barnwarmer 16"America's First Female Comic
27 total reviews
Comment from LJbutterfly
It's funny you mentioned dinner in your notes. I made dinner, but wanted to read your script first. I thought I'd have the answers to the puzzle, but I'm glad there will be more. This script is totally captivating. By the way, congratulations on being awarded Script of the Month for July.
reply by the author on 01-Aug-2022
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It's funny you mentioned dinner in your notes. I made dinner, but wanted to read your script first. I thought I'd have the answers to the puzzle, but I'm glad there will be more. This script is totally captivating. By the way, congratulations on being awarded Script of the Month for July.
Comment Written 01-Aug-2022
reply by the author on 01-Aug-2022
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Thank you, Lorraine, for reading and for the congratulations. I think I'm the only one who writes plays. Or the only one who promotes them high enough to get the ATB, needed for Script of the Month. But the 25 member bucks does come in handy.
You make me so happy to know you find my script captivating. Thank you for the compliment.
Comment from Terry Broxson
LOL, You just dragging us along like a bell cow bringing the herd in at dusk. If nothing else, you deserve a gold medal for chutzpah and another for dialect. Good job. Terry.
reply by the author on 01-Aug-2022
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LOL, You just dragging us along like a bell cow bringing the herd in at dusk. If nothing else, you deserve a gold medal for chutzpah and another for dialect. Good job. Terry.
Comment Written 01-Aug-2022
reply by the author on 01-Aug-2022
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I SO want this to be over. But you know what? There are a few out there who really love Fanny and don't want it to end. They're not the one writing her dialect, though. I'm not kidding -- I found myself talking to my dog in dialect. Thanks, though, for reading. And for understanding.
Jay
Comment from Katherine M. (k-11)
I should give you the sixth star just for your rapid and careful editing. It's immaculate, and I can read it easily now. It's horrifying the difference the squiggles make. It is a breathtaking read and when you juddered that curtain I wailed out loud ''oh, no''. I understand why you have to do this, but I'm just greedy for more. What will I do when we do get to the end? Maybe the same as with Harry Potter. Start again, without being constrained as to when I put it down. As per my understanding of your instruction, I am (with reservations) holding back on the six until you reveal... whatever hides in the wings. Kate xx
reply by the author on 01-Aug-2022
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I should give you the sixth star just for your rapid and careful editing. It's immaculate, and I can read it easily now. It's horrifying the difference the squiggles make. It is a breathtaking read and when you juddered that curtain I wailed out loud ''oh, no''. I understand why you have to do this, but I'm just greedy for more. What will I do when we do get to the end? Maybe the same as with Harry Potter. Start again, without being constrained as to when I put it down. As per my understanding of your instruction, I am (with reservations) holding back on the six until you reveal... whatever hides in the wings. Kate xx
Comment Written 01-Aug-2022
reply by the author on 01-Aug-2022
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Ha-ha! I had told so many people during the previous scene that this one would definitely be the last. But like I said in the remarks to this one, I had to really light a fire under Juniper to motivate her enough to avenge her father's death when she didn't remember her father's lynching and she had only just heard than her mother had planned on assassinating Thurston Flourney. But don't expect a major surprise in the wings.
Comment from amahra
I read your Author's Notes and am about to hang you up to dry. LOL! But I get it. And you're right. I do the same thing. That's why my recent chapter has a part 4 coming up. We can't hurry to the end without justifying every detail before getting there.
I enjoyed this chapter, Jay. Great job! I particularly like the little fainting spell you gave Fanny. It made the chapter even more realistic. Now, just a little concern below:
--�¢??thet she's a�¢??--�¢??oh! [ Jay, you must find out how to substitute this gobbly-goo with something similar on the fanstory writing site. Example: my computer has a long dash I use instead of commas, but it transfers in gobbly-goo, so I delete them and use the fanstory (--) double dash instead.]
reply by the author on 01-Aug-2022
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I read your Author's Notes and am about to hang you up to dry. LOL! But I get it. And you're right. I do the same thing. That's why my recent chapter has a part 4 coming up. We can't hurry to the end without justifying every detail before getting there.
I enjoyed this chapter, Jay. Great job! I particularly like the little fainting spell you gave Fanny. It made the chapter even more realistic. Now, just a little concern below:
--�¢??thet she's a�¢??--�¢??oh! [ Jay, you must find out how to substitute this gobbly-goo with something similar on the fanstory writing site. Example: my computer has a long dash I use instead of commas, but it transfers in gobbly-goo, so I delete them and use the fanstory (--) double dash instead.]
Comment Written 01-Aug-2022
reply by the author on 01-Aug-2022
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Thank you so much, Amahra. Please don't tell me you reviewed it for 2 cents. I'm afraid you did. You see, I hadn't even intended to post it until next week, but somehow it slipped through, and for 3 hours (until I found out about it) it was un-promoted. Now it is all cleaned up and is on the top of page 1. Sorry to put you through all that.
Jay
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That happened to me a couple of times. LOL! No problem.
Comment from BethShelby
I like how these characters start to take over your story and change things to suit themselves. Peter didn't want be left out, and that's good cause I wasn't anxious to see this story end. I hope you don't let Ms Fannie die or nothing. It looked like she was about to have a stoke there fore a minute. I know Evil Eddy played around with a lot of dialogue when you transferred your play to FanStory. I don't know if they is a way to fix it.
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reply by the author on 01-Aug-2022
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I like how these characters start to take over your story and change things to suit themselves. Peter didn't want be left out, and that's good cause I wasn't anxious to see this story end. I hope you don't let Ms Fannie die or nothing. It looked like she was about to have a stoke there fore a minute. I know Evil Eddy played around with a lot of dialogue when you transferred your play to FanStory. I don't know if they is a way to fix it.
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The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 01-Aug-2022
reply by the author on 01-Aug-2022
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It's already been fixed, Beth. I'm sorry you had to struggle through it in its unedited form. I was not even aware for about 3 hours that it had posted. I was going to post it next week. I hope you didn't have to read this for 2 cents. (but I think you did)! Sorry!
Jay
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I didn't look to see what it was paying and I assumed I got the usual amount but I get the unedited version. I'm glad it was fixable I enjoyed it.
Comment from lyenochka
Well, I don't know if you got this cleaned up but my reading has all those FS gremlin characters.
You're doing a great job with helping us see the psychological transformation. I think the stress and inflection directions could be done by bolding or capitalization as actors often don't like that kind of specific direction.
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The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 01-Aug-2022
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Well, I don't know if you got this cleaned up but my reading has all those FS gremlin characters.
You're doing a great job with helping us see the psychological transformation. I think the stress and inflection directions could be done by bolding or capitalization as actors often don't like that kind of specific direction.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 01-Aug-2022
reply by the author on 01-Aug-2022
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Damn it! Excuse me, but it was not supposed to be released. I hadn't even begun editing it. Sorry
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Darn! I knew it wasn't like you to release it before getting those squiggles out. But oh well, I was waiting at the dentist office so you helped with the wait!
Comment from barbara.wilkey
So, the report came right out and asked if Juni told Peter before Elizabeth had her stroke of her plans. I can't wait for the answer. This is another good post.
seed it in her face thet day they step off th' trainâ??--â??thet she's aâ??--â??oh! (EE had played with your post in numerous areas.)
reply by the author on 01-Aug-2022
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So, the report came right out and asked if Juni told Peter before Elizabeth had her stroke of her plans. I can't wait for the answer. This is another good post.
seed it in her face thet day they step off th' trainâ??--â??thet she's aâ??--â??oh! (EE had played with your post in numerous areas.)
Comment Written 01-Aug-2022
reply by the author on 01-Aug-2022
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Barbara, thank you, but this was not supposed to even release.
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Hmmm, it was